Chapter 1
Uncivilized. That was the best way Chrysalis explain how she looked at the moment. Another wave of nausea hit the Queen, causing her to shove her head back over the toilet bowl as she anticipated the following reaction. A dry heave later, the changeling let out a groan as she propped herself up against the bathroom wall. Levitating a bottle of water to her lips, Chrysalis gargled the water and spit it out so she could get the taste of vomit out of her mouth.
After waiting to see if her sickness passed, the Queen stood up before dragging herself into the shower. This has been her routine for the past week. She would wake up early in the morning and rush to the bathroom only to throw up what little was still in her stomach and dry heave for a few minutes. Then, after a hot shower, she’d feel perfectly fine aside from the fact that she could out eat all of the drones in the hive once she got down to the dining hall. There was a knock on the bathroom door as she tried to rinse the soap out of her mane.
“What is it?” groaned Chrysalis. She gave out a low moan as the water worked out one of the kinks in her shoulder. There was a shuffle outside of the door before someone answered.
“My Queen, the doctor is her to check on you as requested.” answered a drone. Chrysalis grunted a response before rinsing herself off. Shutting off the water, Chrysalis used a quick spell to dry herself before brushing through her mane quick to get the snarls out.
Opening the door into her bedroom, a single drone dressed in a white coat stood waiting for her. The drone gave a quick bow before gesturing to the bed. Chrysalis gave a nod before seating herself.
“So what has been ailing you, my Queen?” asked the drone. With a flash of green, a clipboard with what Chrysalis could imagine was her medical record appeared before the changeling.
“I’ve been waking up sick and throwing up last night’s dinner for the last week.” said Chrysalis with a sigh. “Then I feel fine for the rest of the day, but could eat a manticore for every meal.”
“I could think of one thing causing it.” said the doctor, putting down his clipboard. “But it isn’t something changelings usually get. It is more of a mammal trait.”
“Mammal?” asked Chrysalis, watching as the doctor started rummaging through the bag he brought with.
“Yes, mammal.” said the doctor, coming out with a small thermometer looking device. “Have you went to the bathroom yet this morning?” After a shake of her head, the doctor handed the device to her. “I want you to pee on the narrow end of that, wait a couple minutes and we will see what it comes out as.”
Chrysalis raised an eyebrow, but followed his orders. Afterwards, Chrysalis stayed seated as she watched the screen on the device. She did not understand why she had to pee on it of all things, as she was not sure what that would accomplish, but she just wanted to be over with her sickness.
Suddenly, a small red plus sign appeared on the screen. “Its a plus.” shouted Chrysalis through the door, puzzled.
“Are you sure?” replied the doctor.
“Yes, I am not blind.” said Chrysalis with a scoff.
“Then congratulations, my Queen.” said the doctor. “You are pregnant.”
“...Pardon?” The fact that changelings can get pregnant was not unheard of. It normally was after said changeling would come back from a mission where they gained love from more carnal means than just wooing a stallion. However, Chrysalis had not done such a thing, at least not successfully.
“How could that happen?” asked Chrysalis, opening the door to her bathroom. “I haven’t been with a stallion in ages!”
“Well, there are multiple ways. The obvious one, some have gotten pregnant from having seed planted inside them, which I doubt you did, and in extreme cases, powerful magic can carry the genes of the caster as they are using their own essence after a certain point. It could be that if you recently locked horns with a powerful unicorn, it could have caused this reaction.”
Chrysalis thought for a moment. She battled with at least four unicorns recently. She’d hardly call Shining or his sister powerful, and Cadence barely any strength in her when they battled. The only one that took a good amount of energy to battle was…
“Oh shit…”
Celestia let out a sigh, rubbing the bridge of her nose. The past week had been busy after a guard stumbled upon another underground passageway in the castle along with rumors of changelings in Canterlot, again.
Since the invasion, both the residents of the city and the guard have been paranoid about another attack. Even Shining Armor called off his honeymoon to chase the rumors of changelings, much to the annoyance of his wife. Every day a new supposed threat or rumor was brought to her attention, the list seemed to go on for miles.
“I’ve had the guards check the new passageway multiple times for changelings and posted a guard at both entrances.” said Shining Armor. Next to him, Cadence stood annoyed as she was initially there to talk to Celestia about something. “If any changelings try to enter the castle, we will know.”
“And we didn’t close off the entrances and put wards on where they used to be to detect magic use, why?” asked Celestia, raising an eyebrow. “If we continue to waste resources on supposed rumors and putting soldiers where we don’t need to, we won’t be prepared if, and I mean if, there is another attack.”
“But if we keep guards at the entrances, we can catch them sneaking in!” countered Shining.
“No, that's why we have wards. If you want to catch them, guards will make them steer clear so we can’t catch them.” said Celestia with a sigh. “No one is that stupid to try and use those entrances now.”
Almost on cue, the door opened as a group of guards escorted in Queen Chrysalis. She wore a magic limiter on her horn and had multiple spears pointed at her. “Princess, we caught her trying to use the cave entrance.”
“Ha! I told you so!” said Shining Armor as he trotted towards his new prisoner. “I’ve always awaited the day of your capture.”
“Get any closer and you will need a seeing-eye dog.” growled Chrysalis, causing Shining to take a step back, much to Celestia’s amusement.
“So, instead of proving Shining Armor’s point, why did you return so soon after your failed invasion?” asked Celestia. “Surely you knew our security would be tighter.”
“I came because I had a message and I came in peace.” said Chrysalis. “I tried to explain it to these dunderheads, but they seem pretty poke-happy with those spears.” Celestia nodded and the guards lowered their spears, but did not leave her side.
“There, now what is this message that you have?” asked Celestia, staring at the changeling. Chrysalis took a deep breath before answering.
“I’m pregnant.” The room fell quiet as all eyes fell on Shining Armor. The stallion looked around before starting to panic.
“W-what?! N-no! I swear I didn’t do anything!” exclaimed Shining, turning to Cadence. “Caddy, please! You have to believe me!”
“It’s not you, dumbass.” said Chrysalis, rolling her eyes. “You couldn’t even make it past foreplay.” The changeling started making her way towards Celestia. “The only way I could get pregnant is by connecting magic with a powerful unicorn. Since Spineless over there is only good with shields, and his little sister wasn’t any better, that only leaves one option.” Chrysalis stopped just at the foot of the throne, quickly surrounded by guards. “It’s yours, Princess Celestia.”
“...What?”
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OH MY GOD YES, FOLLOWED
please credit lopoddity.deviantart.com for the cover art!!
Wait, if it's rare for changelings to get pregnant, how do they reproduce?
9019370
The source goes directly to the page but alright I guess
9019396
Semi similar to reptiles. They lay eggs. Chapter 2 will kinda explain more.
hmmm....
*tries to sneak follow in*
This has potential...
...Oh, why do I have the feeling I'm going to be laughing my ass off here?
9019626
My own, nothing to do with Lopp's verse
9019750
Terribly hilarious
Mmm, this looks interesting. I'll wait and see how things will play out with this little big revelation.
Ya, this will be a hit, maybe.
How often will you update?
Who else laugh their asses off at this paragraph, cuz I did!
This looks absolutely hilarious. I'm tracking, but you need an editor.
Ya, i like this.
BRING ON THE CUTE!!!!
Interest piqued. Let's see how this goes.
This oughta be good.
I laughed from all shining-Chrysalis sentences, it was perfect
Fun concept, but it's written like crack. Fast paced, blasé, and with far too much humor injected into everything. It feels like the story is only there to lead to the next joke or laugh; like you're rushing through the actual plot points so you can have a character snap off another witty one liner.
I suggest a comedy tag so readers understand this isn't a serious story.
Dis gon be good
so...... whens the wedding *u*
9019401
How fast will the chapters be coming out? Just a rough estimate no rush.
I can't belive i am saying this but I wanna see more.
9020353
Really just depends on mood and whenever I finish the next chapter. I got one chapter all ready to post but I haven't finished the chapter after it yet so...
This can't be the only Celestia has been told someone is baring her child.
...right?
Oh, my Celestia Yes Finally! a Celestia X Chrysalis story that is featured and that isn't dead!
I ship it!!!!!!!!
You can almost hear Celestia's brain careen off the tracks at the end.
I love the interactions with Shining.
'That was the best way Chrysalis explain how she looked at the moment' - Chrysalis could explain
'doctor is her to check on' - here
'Then I feel fine but for the rest of the day' - remove but
'rummaging through the bag her brought with' - the bag he brought with himself
'more carnal means then just wooing a stallion' - than
'The only I could get pregnant' - only way I
“And we didn’t close off the entrances and put wards on where they used to be to detect magic use, why?”
This doesn't sound like something Celestia would say.
Love this story so far! Keep going! I think it may deserve a comedy tag!
9020254
I'm going to have to agree with KoB. Chrysalis is caught by guards who just feel justified waving their spears at her... when at their levels of jumpy and retribution for the attack one would think they'd be skewering her immediately, and I can't blame it on discipline because they don't seem to HAVE any. Shining arguing with Celestia, and allowing himself to be intimidated before his ruler as THE Captain of the Guard? Allowing himself to be distracted by personal issues when the enemy leader is a few feet in front of him and her horn is unrestrained?
This doesn't work as a normal story, for the characterization and other issues KoB listed above. However, it can pass just fine as a crackfic with liberal applying of the Comedy tag since that seems to be what you're going for.
Fantastic concept for a well-fleshed story, one I would read as I prefer Celestalis shipping over most other forms of Celestia shipping, particularly when she's in the somewhat more dominant position rather than the submissive. But we'll see how the comedy shapes up.
i feel like this will be a beautiful trainwreck that evolves into something truly glorious.
missing word
Perfect reaction. Absolutely perfect. Also, this line, and the one to which it is a response, can be used to predict the general outline of the story: What the fluff is going on? With a sprinkle of overprotective Chryssi once the foal comes, and a garnish of diabetees.
I read it as
WHAT
XD
This could be amusing, but it needs edited. Some of the dialogue is also oddly stilted. I'm guessing you're translating from another language? Possibly one that doesn't have a large difference between formal and informal speech?
9024150
Nope, just really suck at spelling and grammar
“It’s not you, dumbass.” said Chrysalis, rolling her eyes. “You couldn’t even make it past foreplay.”
That explains why it took 5 seasons for Flurry Heart to be born.
9024463
I was wondering why it took so long!
I don't get why "only being good with shields" makes Shining not a powerful unicorn when his power is literally the reason Chrysalis was able to defeat Celestia. Wouldn't it make even better sense to say, instead of
"She’d hardly call Shining or his sister powerful, and Cadence barely any strength in her when they battled."
"While Shining, his sister, and his wife were somewhat powerful, none of them had been able to put up a good fight."
?
I really like this story so far great job! I like your profile picture btw.
Its so sad to see such a good joke oportunity wasted. She should have said "I'm pregnant... And you are the mother"
You were saying
While i am not sure about the reason for her pregnancy, i find myself not caring all that much, as i believe that this is gonna be hilarious
Agreed Shit!
“It’s not you, dumbass.” said Chrysalis, rolling her eyes. “You couldn’t even make it past foreplay.”
Apply cold water to the BUUUUUUUUURN.
Instant fav and like. Gz.
''It's your's, Princess Celestia''
If someone told me i got them pregnant i would scream, then run, then faint.
wow Celestia is a VERY calm person
9622261
Wait for it~
If I had a nickel for every fic I've read where Celestia was the father of a villain's child I'd have two nickels, which isn't a lot but it's weird that it happened twice.
11627192
Out of curiosity what is the other one.