• Member Since 31st Oct, 2016
  • offline last seen 3 hours ago

Banshee531


I've always been a lover and writer of fanfiction, but it wasn't until I got into MLP that I really found something I loved writing about. Hope you all enjoy.

Sequels1

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This story is a sequel to Flash Sentry, Crystal Darkness


After their battle with King Sombra, Flash and friends are hoping to go back to Ponyville and relax. However, things are never what they seem, as the Elements of Harmony soon find out that new adventures and threats are just around the corner. And as these encounters make themselves known, they soon find out that it'll take more than the Elements to take on these new enemies.

Edited by KingJoltik

Now on TVtropes

Chapters (20)
Comments ( 236 )

I tend to have a quiet birthday myself.

Still a simple and fun chapter.

Well, he did ask for a surprise.

Good to see Flash had a Happy Birthday. Hope your birthday goes well too when it gets here.

an interesting start.
I wonder how Flash will take Celestia's want to release Discord.

Wait...

"That Sombra...he was not part of any vision I had and yet he almost killed him!"

... WT............................................................ (comment cut short)

"Don't take me out coach. I can still play..." Springer replied, his head shaking back and forth. "I mean it coach. Don't replace me with the yellow mouse..."

This made me laugh so hard. :rainbowlaugh:

Is this season going to be the same length as the last two or are we getting a short season?

Also, what did Flash's mom foresee that convinced her to give up her kids? And if she didn't foresee Sombra then what is Flash's connection to him? So many questions! :applejackconfused:

Hey, this is being featured!

8926815
That yellow mouse keeps haunting Springer.

8926815
(Reads your last statement) Hi, TFS Dragon Ball Abridged Imperfect Cell :pinkiehappy::trollestia:

Why do I get the feeling that when Banshee gets to his Pokemon fix, Pickachus will be the bane of Springer.

Side note, believe it or not everyone's favorite electric rodent's design was based on a squirrel and there was a form beyond Raichu he could... 'evolve' into, gorochu.

8927095
If only you knew the truth about Springer and his war with the yellow mouse.

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So, is the yellow mouse real or just an entity that haunts his dreams and hallucinations? :rainbowlaugh:

Hold on. Banshee, were you planning on having Scootaloo use Flash as a trampoline or did you borrow the idea from my comment in Crystal Darkness? :applejackunsure:

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I'm not sure, but I do know one thing. I wrote all the stuff with the yellow mouse in this story, including the scene in the first chapter of season 2. That's why I did that reply when he said Banshee getting his Pokémon fix.

8927251 You're idea. Thanks for that.

Awesome start. I guess in season 4 or 5 we will meet Flash's parents. Great job here. I can't wait to read Flash's reaction when Twi ascends. To be honest, what I think should happen is Blueblood or other nobles come to court Twi, and Twi just thinks about how she wants to get away and have fun with Flash, While Flash is grinding his teeth, as we is told he can't be an overbearing guard to Twi.

I just realized that this is the first one of your bigger stories that has a Romance tag. This IS the season that changes everything! :pinkiehappy:

Good job. That flashback was a little depressing, but it is nice to see Scootaloo has Flash and Rainbow in her life now.

"Pfft! Are you serious?!" The mare yelled as she landed by the filly, leaning down till her muzzle was almost in Scootaloo's. "You're gonna take the advice of some egghead like that?! He doesn't know a thing!" The mare then tapped Scootaloo's chest with her hoof. "Listen kid, if you really wanna fly, then you gotta try. That's all there is to it."

:facehoof::twilightangry2: Okay, I know doctors have gotten prognoses wrong before and that people have found ways to beat the most impossible of odds, but you can't just tell people, especially little kids, to completely disregard medical advice like that. I'm sorry if I'm taking this too seriously, but this part kind of angers me as a medical student.

Hmm, I was sort of expecting Shade to make an appearance, but I guess this works too.

:pinkiegasp: "stunned silence" I don't even know where to begin. That ending. "more stunned silence"

Twilight, who was shakily clutching Flash, nodded. "My whole life flashed before my eyes. There were so many books..."

And this is why you don't dismiss the only pony who knows anything about how to properly visit a working military facility and coerce him into letting you have your way. :ajbemused: Why would you even do that, Twilight, especially when Flash clearly had the more reasonable argument? But I guess in your defense, Pinkie was about to reach dangerous levels of insanity.
I hope Flash's possible trauma-induced attitude change gets addressed soon. He's kind of starting to scare me. :twilightoops:

You know I agree with Firebrand/ JoshScorcher, Spitfire isn't intimaditing enough to be a Drill Sergeant.

Besides, since she's effectively the Wing Commander of the Wonderbolt she's to high up to be a Drill Sergeant. I always think a pony version of Sergeant-Major Williams would have worked better.

But I have to say, I like the dynamic between Soarin and Spitfire.

Alright, I've been waiting for this particular episode! Where do I begin?
I loved the My Hero Academia reference you sneaked in, that was funny. But for the actual plot, I like how much Soarin's presence changed everything, just by convincing Spitfire to make Rainbow the lead pony. Also, Lightning's attitude. In the show she comes off as a "Bitch in Sheep's Clothing", but since she didn't get her way here she is just an angry bitch. I wonder if she'll show up again eventually since she swore revenge on Rainbow?
Finally, Soarin and Rainbow's relationship was beautiful. That ending scene with their first kiss was great. You really do a great job handling my two favorite ships. I hope we get to see more of Soarin soon.

8954317
Hold the phone. In Crystal Darkness, I commented that I had a feeling that this season was going to turn out like Shadow Gates. Banshee just gave us Lightning Dust being a heartlessly awful beast to Rainbow Dash and her friends. She even swears revenge on Rainbow Dash and everything. This is turning out like Shadow Gates.
:pinkiegasp:"sudden realization" Shadow Gates had some similarities with the Siege of the Crystal Empire arc in the comics. Chrysalis, Flim and Flam, and Lightning Dust working with Sombra. Check. Sombra getting redeemed at the last minute. Check. No wonder Flash has been getting serious. It's like he's subconsciously aware that his life is about to get dark and that his near-death experience in Crystal Darkness was just the previews. The movie hasn't even started yet. :fluttershyouch:

"I won't deny that you may be right, Flash," Twilight flatly said as a magic aura fully covered her horn, "But, I also want to support my friends, even if the one in front of me is in even deeper trouble right now." A small tinge of sweat could be seen going down Flash's face now, as he then saw Twilight's face morph into one of anger as she continued, "And guess who's both in trouble and going to help us?!"

Hey Twilight, your BBBFF is in the military, how do you not know protocol? ..Book horse is a stupid horse...

Honestly... I felt that this was lacking, the episode was about Rainbow's growth and having her be the lead pony up front doesn't challenge RD, Lightning Dust is meant to be a dark reflection of RD and RD being the lead of the two doesn't allow for RD to see what she could be.

8955921
I agree that the original episode was about Rainbow's growth, with Lightning Dust being much like how she was before her character development except without any of the positive traits. But I believe this version is about introducing Lightning as a possible future antagonist and developing Rainbow and Soarin's relationship.
In the show, Lightning was cocking because her recklessness was being rewarded at first, but here when she is made wingpony instead of Rainbow she is very hostile due to not getting her way and ignores all attempts to be taught teamwork, which was the whole reason Soarin convinced Spitfire to make the change. Plus it is interesting to see how the episode and characters change by simply including Soarin and having him vouch for Rainbow.

8956300
I still find this take lacking because Rainbow already knows how to lead, she doesn't know how to take or follow orders and when not to. That's something that she really does need to learn if she wants a successful career as a Wonderbolt.

8956349
I'm not going to deny that Dash needs to learn how to take orders, but does she really need to learn how to take orders from a--for lack of a better word--misanthropic jerk? Besides, I think Flash's talk and seeing Lightning Dust beat her out at all the preliminary exercises did knock her ego back a few pegs.

8955921
My headcanon for why Twilight doesn't know protocol is that Shining Armor used to regularly break it for her back when she was a filly.
pre00.deviantart.net/51ed/th/pre/f/2013/196/b/f/mlp__recruit_shining_armor__commissioned__by_tan575-d6dk9qt.png (not my art; by tan575)

8956846
Again I find the chapter lacking, what made Lightning Dust stand out was how similar she was to RD and how that RD could just as easily become just like Lightning Dust, something that, in my opinion, is better conveyed with Lightning as the Lead. Also missing in this chapter was the point when RD considered letting go of her dream, if being a Wonderbolt meant transforming into Lightning Dust 2.0, then it's not the place for RD. Which wouldn't be a dilemma for RD Ian's the Leadpony, and it was that moment when RD considered giving up on her dreams that made the episode, and this take, just didn't capture it. Again something that RD as the lead wouldn't have. Sure Soarin calling Spitefire's decision into question was nice, and he got some good character flushing out, but it came at the cost of RD's character growth.

8956912
Still doesn't address her as a grown mare, and wouldn't Shining inform at least Cadance how to visit him on base, which Cadance would have shared with Twilight? Shining couldn't have had many chances to leave the base and being AWOL would have hurt his chances to become Captain of The Royal Guard

Overall great chapter. I loved it. It seems like love is in bloom.

Awww. Leave it to Pinkie to get Flash to smile again. :twilightsmile: You know, Pinkie is a pretty tough character to write. Writers can end up making her too silly, and she goes from being the Element of Laughter to nothing but an annoying joke. However, they can also swing too far the other way, and she ends up either losing her Pinkie-ness at best or turning into a crazed serial killer at worse. I think you managed to capture what makes Pinkie Pie and her Element so important.

It's funny.

I'm currently releasing a project on my FanFiction account which is going to include gremlins too. Only a sort of Discworld interprutation of the Roald Dahl and Disney versions.

"You need to move on, got it?"

Twilight, that's not how to help someone through PTSD. Yes getting him to talk about it helps, but that's the first step.

"Laughing, joking, that's how ponies deal with their fear.

Yes and no, but it's the best coping mechanism out there.

All in all, I didn't Flash was mean to Pinkie, he was serious towards her and acted on what he knew and her past behavior.

However, there has got to be a point when Twilight pulls on Flash's ear one too many times, call it callus or harsh, but I expect at some point Flash will slap Twilight when she pulls his ear, saying something to the effect, "You are not my mother, stop treating me like I'm your foal. I am a grown stallion! Spike's effectively your kid, mother him and leave me the buck alone!"

Well, that might just be how I write, many because of all the times Twilight has done it, there should come a point when Flash response physically to it.

Wow, I wonder if that would be like the end of the first part of a two-parter.

But enough of my musing.

Nice that Pinkie was finally able to help Flash get back to his old self. She does what she does best, cheering others up and brightening their day.

Those Gremlins are tough, but apparently they don't like the taste of their own medicine. Just be thankful they weren't on a plane dealing with them or things might have ended badly.

This got me thinking this song while reading. Great chapter dude.

Not bad, but it falls into the same pitfalls the episode fell in.
Namely the matter of 'The Stare' and the reform spells
But it was nice for Flash to thank Discord for in a roundabout way saving Scootaloo.
And Iron's Piecemaker getting popped.... :rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh:

Well, you offically covered one of the biggest episodes of the series. I can't wait to see how Discord will turn out in this universe, especially since Iron and Fluttershy have already bonded with each other, which could lead to many jealous moments with Discord.

Either this is the halfway point of the story due to season 3 being half the length of other seasons, or you have a lot of extra stuff planned for this season and the story is only 25% done. Either way it is good so far.

"Oh, this is not gonna be any fun," Flash said as he blinked at the sight. "I know I'm trying to be more positive recently, but please don't tell me that's what I think it is."

Yeah, that's not going to help his PTSD. :ajbemused:

Iron once again pointed his weapon at Discord. "Put her down! Now!"

Somepony is jealous. :ajsmug:

Said pet rabbit looked horrified at this before rushing over to Discord and grabbing onto his foot, trying to drag him off the couch. Once it realized it was hopeless, it sulked and walked away. Iron patted the rabbit on its head as it passed by. "I know fuzzball, I know."

Aww. I love it when pets get affectionate with their owner's love interests.

"Yup..." Springer added, only to look back at his partner, "Wait a minute, did we just debate over nothing then?"

Yes, and it was glorious. :ajsmug:

I hope we get a backstory about discord from the show soon. I mean, I think that in his past is more simple and basic while the writers can add some detail to it to fill in the gaps. What if when discord was younger, he was bullied, laughed at, and ponies are afraid of him because of his appearance. So that way he had a reason why he has no friends. And I may be a Dislestia ship fan but, unlike ILoveKimPossibleAlot, I think Discord and Celestia's relationship in the past is more like friendship than a couple (not opposed to them being a couple, just want their relationship to just develop). Now, when discord said he never had a friend before and he Celestia used to be good friends, what if Discord meant that he thought he could trust her but thinks she's using him for her own selfish benefits (which is not true of course). See how easy that is? That would bring a message to kids and adults that bullying can affect people, even when they became adults. Also to show that we all make mistakes that we're not proud of, but as long we learn from them, and teach our younger generation to avoid that mistake, we could make the world a better place. Sounds naive and cliche, I know, but it works. Let me know what you guys think. Should Discord have a past or not?

Oh, about time! I was starting to worry with all the skirting around the subject, it never really coming up, etc, etc. This was a good chapter that actually addresses the issue at the heart of things and I love the execution.

Though, the first meanwhile could have been done without. I think it'd be better with a phone call at the hospital about a stallion getting attacked by two mares and the receiver thinking it's a prank call. Maybe it's me or something, but sometimes we don't need the point of view from recurring characters about the scene in question.

This chapter was a misnomer. There was no duel.

Nice to see some tension between Twilight and Trixie and the two come together, but did Flash really deserve a beating, couldn't the mares be left stupified?

Beyond that, did you really have to make Flash oblivi...
Buck it, throw the two into a room they can't get off until they both realize they love one another, this plot thread is dangerously close to overstaying it's welcome.

Wow, I never would have guessed that Trixie would be the one to help Twilight realize her feelings for Flash. Also, that scene when they beat up Flash for his obliviousness was pretty funny. I guess stupidity around girls fits the Woman Scorned trope too.

"What...what is going on?" Twilight whispered to herself, making sure no one could hear her.

Let me spell it out for you. Y-O-U A-R-E J-E-A-L-O-U-S. What does that spell? :ajsmug:

:rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh:
Okay, I know that beating was for comedic purposes, but did Flash really deserve that? I mean, how was he supposed to know that Trixie had a thing for him and that that's the reason why Twilight's jealous? :ajbemused:

Oh wow this is almost as bad as Lina and Gaoury from Slayers. I really hope you move this plot thread along faster than they did. Not sure if you're going to do anything with Equestria Girls, but I'd stop the oblivious lovers thread there. By then it would be really obvious to Twilight about her feelings.

HOLD IT! Is Trixie helping spell out Twilight's feelings for Flash going to be a recurring thing in your stories? The only set where Trixie makes an appearance where this hasn't happened is the Power Rangers series. :trixieshiftright:

YEAH!!!! GO Trixie!!! I hope that Twi and Flash realize there is something between then either after Twilight ascends or when she goes through the mirror.

And we have more Flash abuse. LOL

Then, the gap closed, and the lips locked.

About damn time.:heart::pinkiesmile::yay:

"Thanks," Pinkie replied before pulling out a tray of weird knickknacks. "I've also got a bunch of things we can sell to the crowd." She pulled out an orange stick that looked like it had a fork like appendage on the end, which she pointed at Applejack. "Flank scratcher?"

"Ah told yah before Pinkie, no."

"Flank scratcher?"

"Pinkie no."

"Flank scratcher?"

"NO!"

Pinkie's hair deflated as she lowered the device. "Flank scratcher..."

Peter Griffin from Family Guy has his butt scratchers. Pinkie Pie has her Flank Scratchers.

Owlowiscious however, tried to help by grabbing Winona's leash, only for the border collie to drag her along as well.

him

Heck, you can't even be trusted to take care of a baby phoenix!"

... wow... that one actually hurts...

Honestly, why I get the use of Springer, I sincerely think Owlowiscious' silence was better than Springer's commentary.
Nice call back to Peewee and his absence.

Please, don't do the comedy of error of Games Ponies Plays, or at least have Flash be, "Are you sure this is Ms. Harshwhinny, excuse, ma'am" and call out the lack of forethought on the Mane 6's part.

I liked how Springer was calling out Spike on his greediness. So next we'll see Flash's side of things at the Crystal Empire.

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