• Member Since 19th Dec, 2015
  • offline last seen 39 minutes ago

Penalt


This is my quest. To follow that star! No matter how hopeless, no matter how far.

T
Source

King Sombra has returned, and worse he was already in place when Shining Armor, Cadance, Twilight and their friends went to the Crystal Empire. Outnumbered, an enraged Celestia tries to find the calm necessary to command her forces and avenge Twilight Sparkle and her friends.

This is yet another of my "Song Stories." Stories where I have taken a filk or similar song and woven a brief story around it. Other stories in this series are:

Rock Bottom
Fighting for Twilight
and
Twilight's Friendship

I hope you enjoy this offering and there will be youtube links in the afterword to the songs involved themselves.

Chapters (1)
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Comments ( 10 )

That was awesome!
Very well written, follows a very smooth and comfortable pace and you worked hard to capture all the emotion that comes from immediately before a battle- which is in my opinion so much more powerful than an actual combat (which can be dreadfully stale in the wrong hooves).

I'll definitely be reading your other works, because this was thoroughly enjoyable!

The link to Fighting for Twilight takes to Rock Bottom :twilightoops:

8704639
Whoops! Gimme a sec and I'll have that fixed.

This was a really good story, especially since I'd heard and loved both of the songs. However, that last line killed the mood in my opinion. You'd done a great job with the emotions and with building suspense towards the end, but then the ending is just "he fucked up". Doesn't really fit with the writing style to me. However, that said, I still enjoyed the story, and gave it a like and a fave. :twilightsmile:

8721733
Thanks for the feedback. And ya, maybe something slightly different at the end would have been better. I'll try to keep it in mind for the next time one of these songs grabs onto me and drags me into writing something.

8721900
You’re welcome, and I look forward to whatever you write next. :pinkiesmile:

Incidentally, seeing the title was "Battle Dawn" was what caught my interest. I like the song you see.

8833111
Same here, it got stuck in my head and I couldn't get it out unless I wrapped a story around it.

Best of your songfics by far, I think.

loved it i can actually see the the battle unfold while i was reading it
and sombra is so very screwed

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