Fast Hack is walking through ponyville and finds a mare who he loves and he talks her into going out with him.
Chapters (1)
Fast Hack
Joined 21st Jul, 2012 ·
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I cried.
scranton.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/rsz/mlfw4309_small.jpg
I feel like I'm reading a newspaper article than a story.
Wat
Have your seventeenth thumb-down.
I hope you where not being serious about this......
oh Gawd WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT! no paragraphs, terrible punctuation, no description what so ever, names not capitalized, words at the begging of sentences are not capitalized , terrible grammar, and the plot was shit.
I SWEAR A 7 YEAR OLD WROTE THIS!....( unless this is a troll-fic then i say well done)
950388 should this require another video of the tf2 classes saying insults
I wish the mods would not approve such abominations of literature. Shame on you.
950448
This requires Left 4 Dead insults.
950463 oh how long will that take
it's a wall of text,
one single wall of.......
text.....
Why would you do this to me.
reads fic *pulls out 9mm pistol and blows brains out*
950467
I'm not good at making insults. So probably there won't be a video.
My eyes!
950457
"Well, um.. It's got ponies... And, um, it's over a thousand words..."
*clicks 'approve'*
950463
"I hate poorly written fanfics"
- Francis L4D1
950488 nooooooo when is that other video going to be made again
My opinion
950519
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MaXe4ubdX8o
Please refer to :06
950545 link is broken
950517
"I hate pony fanfics. Actually, I hate ponies."
"What the hell are you talking about, Francis?"
"Unless they're vests. I wouldn't hate that."
950557
Not for me. What do you mean by broken?
950577 the link doesnt work for me
950577 just tell me the videos name and i will search it
Pony vest hmmm I should ask pinkie for one
950524 Couldn't have said it better.
950590
"Two different versions of the same scene playing at the same time".
950596
VESTS: A Tragic Story
Waaaaaiiiit a minute, I get it! It's not just a troll fic, it's a troll account!
Think about it- Fast Hack? This was clearly written super fast, likely a single sitting, by a hack writer.
On a side note, the heck am I looking at? When I look at his profile, it says that he was last seen an hour before he registered here. How is that supposed to work?
950638 KILL THE WITCH
Guys, this sucks too much to be a troll fic. This makes troll fics look like my little dashie, it sucks that bad... Go stick this fic in a toilet, that's where shit goes, not on here.
10 months two kids wow that is fast!
Oh god this is so bad, I can't stop laughing
WALL OF TEXT!
If you were seriously trying to write a decent fan fiction, I'm afraid you seriously failed at it. I didn't even bother reading it all the way through. Never fear! You can still improve! You should try to follow basic grammar and spelling rules (not being sarcastic here). Watch your punctuation and spelling. Try writing your fic in Google Docs first then import it. That way it doesn't look like the Eldritch abomination that is that wall of text. But before you make your fic public, post it on a forum or board asking for help editing. People can help point out the mistakes you missed.
)
As for the actual story, characters, etc., it needs some serious improvement. I can't write out an entire guide, but here's a good one if you are looking for one: http://tinyurl.com/cpdkgkn
I hope this helps and best of luck!
(If this was a troll fic, then lol
This story is fucking amazing. The emotions, the characters, the format, they all blended together in glorious fucking harmony. SEQUEL!
This sucks, it's horrid, makes no sense, and I fucking love it! It is beautifully horrendous, no other fan fiction can honestly make me say, "It's so bad, that it's entertaining!"
*Starts to shake* PLEASE STOP IT!
since nopony liked this fanfic how can i make my next one better?
953365 ok sence i see no one else is answering you i shall do my best to help
(note that im not the best author myself but i will try to give advice to the best of my ablity)
first i'd like to address the wall of text try spaceing out your story makes it easyer to follow so just hit enter once or twice between speakers
second paceing try not to rush your story but try not to go to slowly either
lastly proofreading make sure to proofread your work(or the grammer nazis will find you) bad grammer can ruin a story i know because it ruined mine
for your effort i will throw a watch your way and hope that you will not be discouraged from trying again
Can't you at least consider grammar...?
yea I'll try
This has potential, but definitely needs some help:
1) Slow down! Your story is going way too fast. For example, knowing Fluttershy, it's going to take a lot more time, prodding, and convincing to get her to go out with Fast Hack, let alone be able to converse with him easily. Didn't read the whole thing, just the first few sentences (and a blurb in the middle), but I could tell that you have included way too much information and time in the relatively small number of sentences/words. Slowing down will let your reader relax, let your reader not feel like he/she's on a rollercoaster, and let you develop your ideas much more fully.
2) Please, please break your story up into paragraphs! It makes it so much easier to read, it's less exhausting for the reader, and less intimidating to the reader than a single solid block of text. Whether you do block paragraphs or indent is completely up to you, as long as there are breaks. Also, each character gets his/her own paragraph when he/she speaks--even if it's just one word.
3) Edit, edit, edit! Check your spelling, check your punctuation, and check your grammar. Also, get a second or third pair of eyes to look over your piece before you submit it. That way, they can help you flesh out ideas, or suggest something that works a lot better grammatically or otherwise.
If you would like, you are more than welcome to PM me (and we can exchange e-mails or something) if you'd like me to edit this and help you out. Spelling and grammar are some of my strong points (my college writing professor even called me her editor-in-training a few times.
) and I would be happy to help you out. Like I said at the beginning, this story does have potential; I mean, who knew that Fluttershy might finally work up enough courage to develop a relationship with a stallion? 
953365 Well, it was a bit rushed. You could split this up into a few chapters so that you can get into the character's emotions. You need to check spelling, punctuation, etc., and make sure to start new paragraphs when needed. (If you're not great at that stuff, I can help
)
You've got a nice idea for a story here, but I don't think that it can be done in just over a thousand words.
And people. SERIOUSLY. Isn't the brony motto "love and tolerate?" I don't think that you're exactly loving and tolerating in the comments here.
999334 i know i was just so mad i forgot about it
950267 Tears of joy in the fact that you have finally found the perfect fic? Me too
You are a god among mear mortals. I LOVE THIS FIC AND I LOVE YOU.
I came and cried at the same time. Thank you, good sir.
999334 I have to agree, it was a bit rushed but it is still quite enjoyable and could benefit from a more developed sequel.
I find it hilarious how the mods let this shit-turd pass inspection.