• Published 2nd Mar 2017
  • 3,261 Views, 143 Comments

Land of Equines - Daddy Joe



Who would've thought that being at the wrong place at the wrong time would bring something so surreal.

  • ...
36
 143
 3,261

PreviousChapters Next
The Landy

The Landy
December 3rd, 2012

I took the same path that Twilight showed me when we first went to Zecora’s. I had to think for a while to fully remember the route because the forest does get denser the more I go in and the snow covers up some areas that would indicated if I were close or not, but I eventually found the right path. Shortly after, I came across Zecora’s hut again. I knocked on the door and Zecora opened it.

“Ah, I see the potion has been put into motion.” Zecora said while smiling.

“I know, right? Not only did it increase my strength, but it also increased the size of my skeleton for some reason.” I said.

“Very puzzling. Please come in.” Zecora said. “Can I get you anything?” she asked.

“No, thanks.” I replied.

With that, she picked up a piece of paper and pencil with her mouth.

“Caleb. Do you feel any different at the moment?” Zecora asked.

“How do I feel? Uhhh, I feel very energized than I did before I took the potion.” I answered.

“Okay.” Zecora said as she wrote my words down on the piece of paper. “Can you move your limbs well?” she asked

“Definitely. Moving my limbs feels so much easier than I originally could.” I said while I quickly waved my hand upward which made a fairly loud woosh sound.

“Very good. What was it like when the effects took into effect?” she asked.

“Oh God. It was the most intense pain I could’ve ever gone through." I said. "First, it felt like my body was literally on fire on the inside and then my body basically went into a coma for three weeks which was the time it took for me to grow to this size." I said.

“Oh my, I am truly sorry for having you go through such suffering. I deeply apologize.” Zecora apologized.

“Apology accepted.” I said.

“That’s all I need to know. Strange how this potion takes a great deal of time to work.” Zecora said.

“Do your other potions work faster?” I asked.

“Not only fast, but more of an instant. This potion requires more tinkering.” Zecora said.

“Right. Just find out a way to make it quicker minus the searing pain.” I reminded.

“Indeed, that is needed very much.” Zecora said.

Zecora then showed me some of her potions that were much more fast acting and well looked at. One looked like milk and was used for looking into the past through your own eyes, which was pretty cool.

“Alright Zecora, I should be going. Nice to talk to you again.” I said.

“Likewise. Before you go, I must mention something.” Zecora said.

“What would that be?” I asked.

“In the young of the night, two days ago, bright anomalies could be seen flashing throughout the woods not far from my home.” Zecora said.

“Bright anomalies? Were they blue?” I asked, curiosity.

“Why yes. How could you have know?” Zecora asked.

“Let’s just say i’ve had encounters with those before.” I said. “Where did you see these lights at?” I asked her.

“To the north.” she answered, pointing out the front window.

“I’ll check it out.” I said.

“Use caution, Caleb.” Zecora heeded.

“I will.” I replied.

I opened the door and headed back out to the cold outside world. While heading toward the direction of the lights, I remembered that the bright blue was a characteristic of the portal that sucked me into the world. Then it hit me. Maybe another person was sucked into Equestria. And it really begs the question; is the portal still active back on earth at this time? Seriously, i've been here for over a month and the portal may still be active.

I ran towards the supposed direction of the lights while looking in all directions for anyone, but couldn’t find anyone.

When the forest became less dense, I noticed something in the distance. It was color that was mixed between cream and snow white. When I got closer, I noticed black wheels at the bottom and quickly pieced it together, it was an automobile.

I went up to it and looked into it to see if anyone was inside, but no one was, unfortunately. I examined the exterior and the body was slightly caked with dried mud on the side. The wheels had no hub caps on them and the tires looked like one’s meant for off-roading because they had the right treads and stated “All Terrain T/A” on the side of it.

I also took notice of a roof rack that had a set of 5 lights on each side of the rack. On the front were added offroad lights that read “Maxtel 4x4” on each light. The back had a spare tire attached to a door, but the license plate however wasn’t American, it was from a foreign country. All in all, it looked pretty badass.

I then went to the driver's door and pulled the door handle and it opened. I tried to fit myself inside the vehicle, but my head hit the roof and my knees were right up against the steering wheel. To fix these problems, I pulled a little bar under the seat and slid the seat all the way back and lowered the seat downwards until it reached its limit. Doing that helped out somewhat. My position would probably be comparable to an average person sitting in an unadjusted car seat.

The transmission was a manual and thankfully I knew how to drive manual, thanks to my father for being someone who grew up in the 70’s and 80’s. The glove box was stuffed with newspapers, so I took out one of the newspapers, but I couldn’t read anything because it was in Norwegian. While digging through the mound of newspapers, I found the driver's manual which clarified the name of the car. It read 1998 Land Rover Defender 110 w/300tdi.

“I scored big time!” I said to myself.

I then climbed out of the Defender, closed the door, and waited for anybody to come back to the vehicle. I waited and waited for a long time and still nobody came.

Curious, I opened the door and checked for the keys, but couldn't find them anywhere. The previous owner back on earth must have it.

I once again got out of the car and left it behind to alert Twilight and Spike of the situation. When I arrived back at the library, I asked Twilight and Spike to follow me back to where I found the Land Rover.

“Hey Twilight, want to see something cool?” I asked
.
“What did you find?” she asked.

“I’ll show you. It’s not far from here.” I said.

After Twilight and Spike put on their winter clothing, we headed back to my previous location.

“So what did you find?” Spike asked as we walked.

“What if I told you it’s technology from my world.” I said.

“Really? What is it?” Twilight asked with enthusiasm.

“It’s what us humans use to get to point A to point B, or to just move around faster. They’re called automobiles.” I explained.

“Automobiles? So…. it moves on its own?” Spike asked.

“Yes, precisely.” I said.

“If it moves on its own, then it must be powered by something. Right?” Twilight asked.

“Yeah, about that. There’s a slight problem.” I said.

“What’s the problem?” she asked.

“Firstly, I need the specific key in order to start up the damn thing and I need diesel to refuel it when it runs out. Also, I need oil to keep the engine working properly.” I said.

“That's quite much to keep it running.” Twilight said.

“I know, right?” Spike said.

Twilight then had an expression on her face that showed that she was thinking of something.

“Actually, you might be in luck, Caleb!” Twilight exclaimed.

“You do? What do you have?” I asked, enthusiastically.

“Since i’m a unicorn and know many advanced spells, I have the capability cast a spell on the automobile and give it power if you show me the power source.” Twilight revealed.

“Twilight, it’s not that easy. The car has an ignition switch that needs to activated by switching the lock with a key.” I explained.

“Okay, okay. Umm, if you show me where the switch is, I can figure out a way to have my magic act as the key and switch it on.” Twilight said.

“You can actually do that?” I asked.

“Mmm-hmm.” she replied.

“That helps. But what about the fuel and oil?” I asked.

"You got me there. I might need my spellbook to answer your question." Twilight said.

I also questioned her how would I turn it off without a key, she didn’t have an answer to this. We thought for quite sometime before I remembered something that I learned in driver’s ed class.

If I could find the fuse box and remove the fuel pump fuse, I can shut off the engine just like that. Yet again, another question lurked out of my mouth. How would I turn it back on without a key? Conveniently, Twilight said she can make the power magic become residual. If the energy is residual, it will reside within the components needed to start the Land Rover and will activate again when I put the fuel pump fuse back in the fuse panel. The fuse will pretty much be the new key. After we walked all they way back for the spell book, we finally made it to the Defender.

“Holy Guacamole! This thing is huge!” Spike exclaimed.

“It reminds me of the carriages we use.” Twilight said.

“I can see that comparison.” I said.

“What’s with all the lights?” Spike asked.

“Those are for driving around at night.” I said.

“Huh, nice.” Spike replied.

“Alright, let’s get to work.” I said.

I opened the driver door and Twilight hopped onto the seat while inspecting the speedometer, tachometer (etc.) She then fiddled with blinker and wiper handles like a child with a new toy. I flicked the front hood handle upwards and lifted the hood up which revealed the engine and the battery.

“Spike, be a pal and keep a look on this engine right here, okay?” I said while pointing at the engine.

“You got it.” he replied.

“Alright Caleb, show me where the ignition lock is.” Twilight said.

“It's right in there.” I said while showing her the key switch.

“Okay. Just let me get in the right position.” she said while lining her horn up with the key lock.

"Wait, wait, wait!" I halted.

"What is it?" Twilight asked.

"The fuel and oil, I almost forgot." I said.

"Oh, right." Twilight said.

"Have any idea on how you're going to make that work?" Spike asked.

"Let me look in my spellbook quick." Twilight said as she opened the book.

Twilight then flipped through numerous pages in the spellbook until she stopped on one.

"I got it!" Twilight exclaimed. "If I use a regenerative spell on the fuel and oil, if there's any in there, then I can make it regenerate over time whenever levels gets low." Twilight said.

"Great!" I replied.

"But I will have to have total silence when I do this. It's a very advanced spell and I need to concentrate deeply." Twilight said.

"Sure, no problem." I said.

"Now show me where the fuel goes." Twilight requested.

Me and Twilight walked behind the Defender and the gas cap was on the left backside of the truck.

"Right there." I said.

"Okay. Now I need silence." Twilight said.

"Fire away." I replied as I stepped back.

Twilight's aura began to light up on her horn and she grunted as she gave somewhat of an effort to conjure the spell. She continued to grunt in effort and shortly after, the sparkling purple aura turned into yellow-like magical liquid substance that went down to the gas tank. Twilight let out a sigh of relief as she finished the spell.

"Phew! That took some effort." Twilight said.

"So what now?" I asked.

"Now that liquid will mix with the fuel and basically bind together to form this regenerative relationship." Twilight said.

"That's an interesting way to put it." I said.

"Now the oil?" Twilight asked.

"Yep. This time it's in the front where the engine is." I said.

"Lead the way." Twilight said.

I showed Twilight where the oil was and took the oil cap off. Twilight repeated the same actions she did moments ago and now the oil was mixed with the magic.

"Alright.... done." Twilight said with a pant.

"Good. Now all we need to do is to activate the key switch and we'll be good to go." I said.

“Show me where the ignition lock is.” she said.

“Its right here.” I said while showing her the key switch inside the truck.

Twilight climbed into the Defender and got on the passenger seat.

“Okay, just let me get in the right position.” Twilight said while lining her horn up with the key lock.

Twilight aligned her horn and pressed the tip right against where the key would go in. While scrunching her face up, a light yellow magical aura emitted out her horn and seeped into the key lock. She continued seeing it inside it for about ten seconds before stopping.

The engine started turning over for about three seconds before it died on us.

"Try again." I said to Twilight.

Twilight tried turning the engine on again, but it didn't work once again.

"Shoot. Hope the magic isn't conflicting with the Defender." I said to myself.

I felt deflated for a moment, but I remembered something. I took out the fuel pump fuse earlier.

"Wait a minute!" I exclaimed as I reached into my coat pocket.

I felt around for a small little chip and found it in the back of my pocket.

"Aha!" I said.

Leaning over, I placed the fuse back into its original spot and the engine came to live instantly, confirming that the residual energy works.

The engine sounded like a pretty good sounding diesel engine. Sounded like -- duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh-duh (pretty much every diesel engine) -- if you say that quickly. A little bit loud to be honest, but it’ll do.

“It works!” Spike yelled over the engine.

“Ha-ha! You did it Twi!” I said in joy.

“Phew! That took some effort.” she said again.

I walked over to the engine and examined it. The engine was surrounded by a faint magic aura while the engine did its job. The battery also had some magical energy inside it as well.

"Now what?” Spike asked.

“Now all I have to do is be sure that the residual energy really works or if it was just luck." I answered.

I headed back for the underside of the steering wheel and pulled the fuse out, killing the engine.

“Now let’s see if that residual energy works.” I said as I plugged the fuse back in which brought the engine right back to life.

“Looks like it works! Alright Spike, close that thing!” I exclaimed.

Spike climbed onto the front of the Land Rover and jumped upwards to get a grip on the hood. He grabbed on and dangled all the way down. With that, he clamped the hood back on nice and tight.

“We’re good!” Spike said.

“Alright guys, time to put this to the test.” I said while brushing snow off the windshield and the rearview mirrors.

“How?” Twilight asked.

“Just get in. I’ll show you.” I said.

I hopped into the driver's seat and opened the passenger door for Twilight and Spike. Both of them climbed onto the same seat that fitted both of them.

“Okay guys, ready?” I asked.

“Ready when you are.” Twilight said.

I pressed my foot on the clutch and shifted into reverse while taking off the parking brake. I then applied pressure to the gas and slowly lifting my foot off the clutch slowly and the Defender began to move backwards. I slowly made my way past the trees and obstacles that were in our way until there was a tree that actually hindered our progress.

“Why are we stopping?” Twilight asked.

“There’s a tree in the way.” I said while looking back.

I put the Land Rover in park and walked out toward the tree. The tree was about a foot shorter than me and a little thick. With little effort, I grabbed on the neck, pulled the tree upwards and ripped it straight from the roots.

“Woah. Must be that enhanced strength.” I said to myself.

I lifted the tree and threw it out of the way into the forest. With that out of the way, I hopped back in the car.

“You pulled that tree out like it was nothing!” Twilight said.

“Must be that strength potion.” I boasted.

“A tough guy, huh?” Spike asked.

“Oh yeah.” I said.

“Okay then, see if you can move this thing with your strength.” Spike challenged.

“Spike. This thing weighs like four-thousand something pounds. I may be strong, but I can’t lift that much.” I said.

“You didn’t even try.” Spike said.

“Okay. But if my back gives out, i'm blaming it on you." I said.

I got out of the Defender and placed my hands under the side of the Land Rover. With a quick jolt upwards, I amazingly lifted the left side off the ground and tilted the Defender to the right. Twilight and Spike yelled in surprise as the truck tilted.

“Holy Shit! That’s awesome!” I said to myself while laughing.

“Okay, Caleb. You proved me wrong.” Spike said while staring blankly in regret.

“Ha! Who’s barking now?” I said.

After that, I backed the Land Rover out of the forest and onto the path we used.

“Alright guys, one safety rule about riding in this is that you must put those safety belts around you.” I said while pointing at the seat belts.

Twilight used her levitation magic to buckle herself in. The seatbelts position looked a little awkward, but it’ll do. Spike looked like a little kid without a booster seat in the car due to how small he was. After everyone was situated, I continued to back out of the forest and onto the path that leads to Ponyville.

“Ready to go?” I asked.

“Yep.” they both said.

“Let’s see what this thing can do.” I said, softly.

“What was that?” Twilight asked.

Without warning, I put the gear into first, and pressed the gas halfway down. The tires spun a little at first, but they finally got traction and the engine emitted the loud roar of a 300 tdi engine. Twilight and Spike tensed up from the sudden force of inertia from the acceleration and I was just taking it all in. I shifted into the next gear which made the Defender throw itself forward a little bit, which made all of us thrust forward in our seats a little bit.

I checked the speedometer and I was going 70 kilometers per hour, those tires sure do their job well. Aside from the spinning tires in the beginning, they surprisingly really grip onto the snow real good. And damn this thing is hella' fast for an offroader. I looked over at my two passengers, who were on the brink of yelling

“Can you slow it down a little?!” Twilight exclaimed, hastifully.

“Alright, alright.” I said as I let my foot off the accelerator.

I then slowed down to a more steady 40 kmh. Twilight and Spike took in a deep breath to catch their breath.

“It’s a rush, isn’t it?” I asked.

“Woo, yeah. This thing is fast.” Twilight said.

“How ya doin’ back there, Spike?” I asked.

Spike didn’t respond because he was stuck in this frozen position while tightly gripping the handle on the door.

“Spike!” Twilight exclaimed.

“Is it over yet?” Spike asked while sounding a little panicked.

“Yes, Spike, we’re going more slower now.” I confirmed.

Spike only responded by sighing and going limp as he sat back in his seat. After a short drive, we made it back to the library.

“You guys go on in." Twilight said. "You mind if I take a look at the Land Rover, Caleb?” Twilight asked.

“I don't mind.” I replied.

Me and Spike headed inside and Spike stopped in his tracks.

“What’s wrong, Spike?” I asked.

“Umpf! Something's coming up.” he said while covering his mouth.

Spike suddenly opened his mouth and let out a belch that emitted green flames and a scroll fell onto the floor.

“What did you just do?” I asked.

“Ugh, it happens whenever I get a letter from Princess Celestia." he explained, wiping his mouth. "Wait, you sent a letter to her earlier, right?” Spike asked.

“I did! It must be the response to my letter.” I said.

“Here.” Spike said as he handed me the scroll.

I quickly opened it and read it.

Dear Caleb Barlow,

Thank you for responding to my letter I sent you. The best time for us to meet together is on December 5th at 11:00 AM. You can get here by taking the train that is stationed at the Ponyville Train Station. I’ve arranged the train to leave Ponyville at 8:50 AM, so make sure to be ready for departure. When you arrive in Canterlot, you will be royally escorted from Canterlot Train Station to my castle. The royal guards will then appoint you to me and my sister’s throne room. When we meet, we will discuss whatever you desire with me and my dear sister, Princess Luna. Remember though, me and her might have some questions for you as well. Anyways, I’m looking forward to this day and will be a day in you life and Equestrian history that will be long remembered.

Sincerely Yours,

Princess Celestia

“Spike…. I have two days until I have to go to Canterlot.” I said, flatly.

“Hey, hey, hey. You get a personal meeting with both princesses. Why so down?” Spike asked.

“I’m not down. I need to look good! I can’t walk into a royal castle with casual clothes!” I said.

“You got a point there.” Spike said.

“Rarity! I’ve got to get to Rarity’s place. Maybe she can whip me up a tux or something.” I said.

“She probably will. She just loves making dresses and all of these fancy clothes.” Spike informed.

“Okay, i’m gonna head over to Carousel Boutique then. I’ll see you later, Spike.” I said as I went for the front door.

“See ya, Caleb” Spike said.

"Twilight, I need to use the Land Rover." I said.

“Where are you going?” she asked, flashing the roof lights on and off.

“I’m heading to Rarity’s. I’ll probably be back by dark.” I said.

“For what?” she asked.

"I'm gonna ask her to make me a suit, or at least something that looks high class." I replied.

"Okay. I'll leave your food out for you incase you get back after dinner is done." Twilight said.

"Thanks." I said, entering the vehicle.

With that, I switched the Defender on and headed off to Carousel Boutique.

Author's Note:

Fun Fact: I originally intended Twilight to find a Mossberg 500 in the backseat of the Defender, but scrapped the idea because it was useless to the plot.

Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!
PreviousChapters Next
Join our Patreon to remove these adverts!