• Published 2nd Mar 2017
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Land of Equines - Daddy Joe



Who would've thought that being at the wrong place at the wrong time would bring something so surreal.

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The Train Ride

The Train Ride
December 5th, 2012

My deep slumber was disturbed with the ringing of wind up alarm clock that indicated today is the day that I go to Canterlot. I looked over at the clock and it read 7:00 AM, which is probably considered abnormal for a time that I wake up to.

“Twilight….” I said, groggily, only to find out that Twilight was already up and lively. “Geez Twilight, I don’t know how you can get up so early.” I said while yawning.

“When you’re Princess Celestia’s pupil, it’s best to get up early.” she explained.

“Welp, might as well get up.” I said while slowly raising myself upwards.

“That’s right. Today’s the day you meet with the princesses!” Twilight said, cheerfully.

“Yep. If someone were to ask me if I would ever meet two pony princesses, I would probably say: 'Are you mentally stable'?” I said, which made Twilight laugh.

“I can probably see that from your species point of view.” Twilight said.

“Oh yeah, no doubt about it.” I said

After I finally got up like a sloth, I headed into the bathroom and took a quick shower, brushed my teeth and all that kind of stuff. For the final touches, I combed my hair into that Mr. Big Shot fashion and slipped on the tux.

“How do I look?” I asked while coming down the stairs.

“Like a million bits.” Twilight complemented.

“Heh.... mare destroyer.” Spike snickered.

“Spike!” Twilight hissed while covering his mouth.

“Don’t worry, Twilight. I’m just eating up Spike’s puns.” I said.

“Okay, i’ll stop with the puns, Caleb.” Spike said.

“Thanks, baby dragon.” I said quickly.

“Special Agent Ape.” Spike shot back.

“Oh, so we’re gonna go that far?” I questioned.

“Alright guys, let’s just drop this and move on. Okay?” Twilight said.

“Okay then. Truce?” Spike said while extending his arm.

“Truce.” I said and we shook on it.

“Good. Now let’s have some breakfast. I made blueberry waffles.” Twilight declared.

Me and Spike looked at each other and sprinted to the tables like children on Christmas morning. Twilight smiled and rolled her eyes in response to the actions.

“C’mon Twi, it’s blue waffles. Who could hate those?” I asked.

“Blueberry Waffles.” Twilight said with smirk.

“Oh, sorry. I’m still a bit tired.” I said with a chuckle.

While we were chowing down on our waffles, Twilight told me that she actually grew up in Canterlot with her parents and brother who is actually a captain of the royal guards.

“So wait, your brother is a captain of the royal guards?” I asked, surprised.

“That’s right.” Twilight responded.

“The royal guards that protect the princesses?” I asked again.

“That’s him.” Twilight replied.

“Dang! Lucky him.” I exclaimed.

“Yeah, but I haven't seen him in such a long time.” Twilight said with her voice sounding down.

“How long?” I asked.

“Ever since I was six years old.” Twilight replied.

“And how old are you now?” I asked.

Twilight let out a sigh and said that she was seventeen old. So, she’s one year younger than me. So interesting, but so odd at the same time. I say this because Twilight has the maturity of a full grown adult and then you have me who's older and almost at full maturity. Back in high school, you would probably rank me as one of the popular kids from a social standpoint, but I digress.

“Damn, that’s pretty rough.” I said while putting my arm around her.

“Yeah, but we still write letters to each other. So it’s not all that bad.” Twilight said.

“Good. You know what, if I see him there, i’ll tell him you said hi.” I offered.

“Thanks, I would like that.” she said.

“What does he look like?” I asked.

“He has a white coat, blue hair with a light blue streaks, and a unicorn.” Twilight described.

“Hm. I’ll try to find a unicorn that fits the description.” I said.

After we finished our breakfast, I looked at the clock and it read 8:10 AM. Forty minutes before the train arrives.

“Hey Twilight, can you show me the way to the train station? Because I have no idea where its at.” I asked.

“Of course I can, I wouldn’t leave you hanging like that.” she responded.

“Alright then, let’s go.” I said.

All three of us bundled up for the frigid temperatures outside and headed off to the train station. The day was sunny and the sunlight glimmered in the snow which sort of messed with my eyes for a moment or two. We decided to walk instead of taking the Defender because I didn’t want it out in the open for someone to steal. We came across Lyra and Bon Bon on the way there and I told them I was heading to Canterlot to meet the princesses, much to to their surprise. Sometime later, we made it to the train station even though we got turned around a few times here and there.

“How much time is left?” I asked Twilight.

“I don’t know. We’ll have to head inside to find out.” Twilight responded.

“Thank goodness, it’s cold out here.” Spike said.

We walked up to the loading platform and peered through the window. The clock read 8:41, so nine minutes left until the train arrives. Shortly after, all three of us heard the horn of a train, indicating that it was approaching. I looked to the left and sure enough, here comes this multi-colored train, quite an interesting design and color scheme for a train. The locomotive began to slow down before coming to a halt next to the platform with a “ssssss” from the brake.

The color’s on the train reminded me of Pinkie Pie a lot. The engine car was all pink with a few yellow hearts on the grille thingy that sticks out in the front and the train. The passenger cars looked really small since the designers probably didn’t exactly have seven foot tall humans in mind when they designed the size. All in all, the whole train looked like a little girl's toy, not that I have a problem with that.

“Ready to go?” Twilight asked me.

“Yup. I’ll see you guys later.” I said.

“Shoot!” Spike exclaimed.

“What is it?” I asked.

“You forgot the mare repellent.” Spike teased once again.

“Okay, Spike, you’re oversaturating the joke. Think of something fresh.” I retorted.

“Hmmm. Alright, I will.” he said.

A stallion with a human skin tone coat, a brown mane, a blue jacket and matching hat that read “Conductor” stepped out of the first passenger car and yelled: “Allllll Aboarrrrd”.

“Good luck, Caleb.” Twilight said.

“Thanks. Make sure to watch over the Land Rover while i’m gone.” I said before walking towards the conductor.

"It's in good hooves." Twilight responded.

“Ah, you’re Caleb. Am I correct?” the conductor asked.

“Yep, that’s me.” I said.

“Well it’s an honor to meet you, sir.” he said.

“Likewise.” I said.

“So if you will, please head inside the car and take any seat you want.” he instructed.

“Okay.” I said.

I inched my way through the entrance of the car, almost getting stuck. I finally squeezed myself through and saw nobody else sitting inside it.

“Excuse me, Mr. Conductor?” I called.

“Yes?” he replied.

“Where is everypony else?” I asked.

“This car is for you, all to yourself. It’s pretty much VIP, or should I say VIH.” he quipped.

“Ohhhh, I see what you did there.” I said when I realized the pun.

“Ha-ha, yes.” he said as he stuck his head out the door and waved to the train engine.

The train then emitted the loud horn as it began to slowly move. I turned my head towards the window and waved to Twilight and Spike who waved back. We kept waving until I lost sight of them and now I was off to Canterlot.

I adjusted my posture since my entire body almost took up the entire seat I was sitting in. The conductor then walked towards me.

“Now, would you care for any kind of refreshment for the ride?” he asked.

“You wouldn’t happen to have hot chocolate?” I asked.

“Why, we have it just for the season. Anything else?” he asked.

“Nah, that’ll be all.” I concluded.

“Excellent. Your cocoa will be with you in a couple minutes.” he said.

“Great.” I responded.

“And above all, enjoy your ride.” he said, tipping his cap.

“I will, thanks.” I said with a nod.

With that, the conductor exited the car into the next one. I stared out the window and saw that the train was entering the open plains, which was covered with a blanket of glistening snow. Shortly after, a cute mare in a waitress uniform walked in with what I requested.

“Here you go.” the waitress said as she handed me the cup.

“Thank you, miss.” I said.

“So you’re like the first human in Equestria?” she asked.

“The one and only.” I said.

“You better watch out for those journalists up in Canterlot, they’ll be all over you.” she warned.

“Don’t worry about me, i’m being escorted by the royal guards once we arrive.” I said, taking a sip of the cocoa.

“Oh, well that’s good. Well anyways, i’ll come back for the cup later when you finish.” she said.

“Okay.” I said.

The waitress than walked out and I continued drinking my cocoa. There wasn’t much to look at through the window since there was a whole lot of open plains and that kind of stuff. The only thing to look at were tree’s that were stripped of leaves. Sometime later, I was sitting quietly and it got dark in the car. I quickly looked out the window and realized the train was entering a tunnel. I also noticed that we will moving in a circular motion on the tracks, almost as if we were moving upwards at the same time.

I began to piece everything together and came to the conclusion that the train was inside the mountain that Canterlot is connected to, it all made sense now. That means i’m getting closer to my destination. The sunlight lit up the interior of the car once again for a brief moment as the train moved to an exposed part of the tunnel, but quickly went back into the darkness of the tunnel. This happened for about five more times until we exited into an area with fine cut grass. Just then, the conductor entered the car and announced that we are now approaching Canterlot Train Station while the train horn blew in the background.

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