Just think a year and some change ago things were business as usual, now though I can barely remember what it was like to not have fight everyday just to survive. Its been a long year and a hard winter hopefully I can get a break sometime soon.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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https://youtu.be/P3ALwKeSEYs
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https://youtu.be/dQw4w9WgXcQ
10337867
Thank you
These transitions are top notch
10337946
I try
either alicorns are made of paper or Hank has decided to focus on a Strength and Endurance build.
he has been killing a lot of enemies to get the exp to upgrade his skills via dark souls like progression.
10338007
My somewhat flimsy reasoning is everything went perfect for Hank and everything went wrong for Celestia. Hank rolled a nat 20 and Celestia rolled a 1 lol
I don't usually do this but I really enjoyed this chapter the transitions gave me a kek every time and I do really enjoy a Zecora x human relationship especially the way you do it. I also enjoyed how you gave a summary of what happened to Celestia and her growing relationship with her sister. Long story short good job friendo.
10338007
10338040
Also could be the bacteria making him stronger. You never know with magic.
That... took a while to update, anyway i haven't spotted any mistakes or typos then again English isn't my main language so i bet i missed a couple of them (that or you simply haven't made any) ,i really liked the chapter and maybe Celly (finally) will come around after that punch. In terms of complains, well the only one i could give would be the update shedule... but that isn't really the best excuse for i quote "I Want MOOOAR" autors update when they feel like it whether i like it or not
EDIT: i got off track even faster than usual... great
Love the chapter, we’re getting some power development and minor character development, can’t wait to see how feral my boi gets.
Firsely, hell yeah, an update, secondly, whats been keeping you from updating bro
10338165
I'm glad that you've continued to enjoy the story and always give feedback, means a lot.
10339614
Well with how the world has been I've actually got more hours at work, my laptop died, stuff has just happened. Plus this chapter sucked to write I didn't really have the desire to work on it ever.
10338623
Yeah I just got a bunch going on, glad you're enjoying it when I do update though.
A solid chapter. I like it. Unfortunately I can see that Shining Armor is going to be a complete dick head about this, as is the norm in these stories. I wish it were not so.
Hey, I'm alright with conversation but I can get wanting to jump back into the action. Thanks for the entertainment regardless!
10341075
I gotta follow some tropes you know lol.
10341102
Me as well my friend and I shall. Also you're welcome.
10337867
It's a shame I know that url by heart now.
10341177 You really don't. You have broken dozens already.
10341187
But I follow the main ones: edgy and OP even though I've tried to avoid the first one but I dunno it's meant to be I guess.
10341280 Blegh! The old tropes are so cliche and idiotic. They always make Shining Armor out to be a senseless idiot hell-bent on murdering the non-pony. Why not make him actually smart for once? Why not make him intelligent? Why make him some moronic, half-witted murder-hobo wannabe?
10341315
I'm trying to make him smart but opposed, due to how Hank has treated his sister. I try to give every decision characters make a reason but I docunderdrsnd and realize that trope. It just came naturally I guess.
10341336 After Celestia openly admitted the fight was her fault AND knowing that despite rumors, he would have access to the after action report of the rescue, would ha really try murdering Hank? I can see being untrusting and cautious, obviously, but to have him ignore facts and rely on his emotions and prejudice feels insulting. Hank never injured Twilight and we already know he is aware of the bank robery Hank foiled. Is it truly so unthinkable that Shining Armor would use his brain?
10341340
I mean I haven't said anything about him trying to kill Hank yet. He wants him gone and dead sure but I haven't made it seem as if SA was going to do it himself. Have I? Is this a disconnect I've created?
10341359 No, but you already confirmed the direction. I'm just giving you something to think about. Anyway, I still love the story. Ttyl.
Lovin’ this!
Бля заебись как всегда :)
Just got caught up again and whoo this is a long one and I loved every part of it
Keep up the good work
More ass smacking!
10343399
This is meant to be read in a playful tone.
I wouldn't change it.
You will never make everyone happy, if you try you'll only loose your hair and spend all your free time rewriting and re rewriting chapters.
Personally i think its a refreshing change from the generic cookie cutter Rambo types that most 16 year olds write about.
I also appreciate that you didn't make him a sexual shut-in so I wouldn't change that either.
You wrote an interesting character thats refreshingly different, and you did it in a way that meshes perfectly in the story. Of course in the end, it is your story and should you change or completely remove anything is completely up to you.
Oh, just a small point. Its been 26 chapters. It would be nice to see a relationship officially form with someone by this point. Either with a stallion or a mare. He is after all a red blooded male who hasn't gotten any in a very long time, and Zecora is pretty much in the same boat. I think its unrealistic that they havent made the beast with two backs by this point. Even just to blow off some steam. Hell, I spent about a month living in close quarters with a close female friend of mine back in high school. We were remodeling an old house she inherited and we ended up camping out in there quite a few nights after working our buts off. We ended up doing the horizontal tango after particularly stressful days. And Im by no means strait, so If that can happen with us under normal life stress, then our hero, by the stress levels in the story, really should be playing hide the pickle with someone by now.
Just a thought more than a criticism.
The monk
“Not telling you too much about humanity's special power, but I can give you a big hint! It is pure, concentrated spite.” -Knight Breeze
Thanks again ThePhoton for another awesome chapter. Love all the POV switches in this story so I hope we get to see more in future chapters. I'm glad to see Hank and Zecora become closer now. You don't see to many Zecoraxhuman shipping's in fanfics so seeing the two together is nice. I'm also excited to see how Hank's and Celestia's relationship turns out from this point on now that they kind of have things set strait between the two of them after their fight. I can't wait to see your next chapter and am excited to see where you take the story from here on, especially with Discord escape from imprisonment coming up soon I'm guessing. Good luck with your next chapter, and as always have fun writing.
10344110
Thank you much man, I'm happy you've enjoyed the story so continuously.
10343528
Yeah I'm just gonna modify how it's written so it doesn't come across as fetish like. And that stuff is coming soon... very soon.
I'm happy that you're still kicking and still writing on the story keep up the good work man also I thought you'd like to know that because of your story it inspired me to work on my own so thank you and I can't wait for the next chapter.
10345622
Then by saying that my job has become complete, that's all a writer of any sorts can hope for. I'm humbled, thank you, and I hope the best for you.
10346021
Thanks for that I was wondering are you planning to open a Discord server of the fans of your series and do you accept fanart?
10346032
Nah, I'm no where smart enough to run a discord or online enough even. Plus a discord for five people seems impractical at best. But I of course accept fan art if anyone feels like they want to put time into making it for a story that dont deserve it.
10346248
If any of the stories I come across like yours make it into my library of stories it's totally worth it and I accept it to be 20% Cooler.
10346285
Well glad you think so.
10346295
All right also if you're ever interested I have a bunch of stories that I have registered and gone through already if you're ever bored check out my library I have a lot of it labeled and easy to find certain the stories that you're interested in but check out the 3 top 10 that I have on my thing you might be interested in one of those.
Now excuse me I need to go find someone who's in my neighborhood is burning plastic and shoot them with a Airsoft Minigun.
With a new chapter read, I can see that you've done a lot of experimenting with differing POV's. A nice fresh approach on your end, and its an interesting development on how you shape it all to third person.
Now, my general thoughts.
Its nice to see both sides. Specifically on how Celestia finally registers that how she has behaved in the last chapter was wrong. She got physical and she was dealt an answer by Hank, tit for tat as it were.
We get to see how she thinks about the events, what the consequences were, the general viewpoints and points given by secondary cast members. Shining Armor shows that protective personality of his, I am sure this isn't going to go well for him but Celestia made the right call of telling them to do nothing, but also in my opinion, did the wrong thing of not giving a little more information but knowing what came up later in the chapter about her injuries, it explains that a lot more so I won't hark too much on that. Only that she will need to explain further eventually. She can't outrun that fact forever.
And Hank, oh boy Hank. We get to see how he's fairing. Hangry is a very appropriate word there when switching scenes. Hank talks about going on a vacation, which I approve. He needs a change of scenery. He needs a change of location. He needs something new and hopefully not get himself hurt. I know that you talked about not liking to write a lot of dialogue, I can understand that but its also a necessary part. Hang in there! You can do it!
I do want to remind of the ideas said before on my end in regards to the bounties, petrol and whatnot. I know you said where you'd like to take things, but blame me for being invested but I think those big highlights matter. If you think otherwise I will respect that. But while I am otherwise not corrected, here we go.
The Minotaurs first of all. I still think its a good idea that he's approached by a representative of their kingdom. Either tracked down or demanded to be contacted through Celestia in some way or fashion. Since Hank took down fugitives from their country, I think they'd be very invested in learning more, but that is simply my opinion.
The petrol second. Now here I think in his little vacation he can go investigate that rumor further. He doesn't have unlimited stores and in his trip it'll be an investment worth checking out on with the Humvee. And in that way, he can also feel perhaps a little assured that he will be able to procure enough in the future.
Third, the Zebras and Gryphons. If I remember correctly, they were mentioned as well since those Minotaurs were notorious through those countries. I think they would be more slow to approach Equestria on this, or Hank himself would honestly go to those nations just to get away from Equestria. There I am not sure so I am leaving that statement as just a verbal shrug.
Where things go is entirely up to you, but these are at least something I wanted to point out once more since it has been a long while since it was discussed, and figured it wouldn't hurt.
All in all though. I like where it is going. Conflict is good but Hank also needs a bit of space in between, or at least, the conflicts he gets into need to be dispersed a little since he tends to get very, very violent, and I am sure that after the Diamon Dog incident, give it a few days and he'll have a new legend or rumor said about him.
I am interested, I am intrigued, and its good to see you posting once more! Excited to see what you have cooked up.
Always your avid reader, Dave.
10347255
Extremely well thought out and in depth response, exactly what I love to see. I will not say anything to spoil what is coming up but it seems as if the next few chapters are quite obvious which makes sense, there are only a few main plot points left. I appreciate your comment immensely and thank you for your readership.
Now reading this the second time. Celestia using the relationship between Luna and Hank as a bludgeon is super gross. This is good storytelling.
10349925
Glad you're liking it dude. I'm trying to make the relationships a bit more organic and natural.
A national leader with a possibility of severe brain damage is at risk of bringing the worst out of their country. Celestia in my humble opinion is quite a big risk right now.
I love this
I thought it was illegal to hunt the does?
10944232
Nah, it's preferred in my opinion. The meat is better and it helps with population control more than taking out a buck. People usually only go after bucks for the racks or for a mount and then they leave the rest of the body out in the woods to rot. That endlessly pisses me off at the amount of waste and lack of respect for the animal.
Zecora before going to hospital : I will tell him how I truly feel.
Zecora now : hmm, yes, Hank here is made of a Hank.