- Member Since 12th Oct, 2015
- offline last seen 7 hours ago
ThePhoton
I'm trying my hardest dammit.... Only problem with that is that 'hardest' really ain't that good.
ThePhoton
Joined 12th Oct, 2015 ·
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more killing
For now it is rather boring.
Still boring.
I tried, but i failed at being interested in this story.
So far so good in my humble opinion. Keep it up
*Croak* “Ah fuck off Kermit.”
beautiful
Love this story, can't wait for the next chapter.
will we see hank meet book horse at some time ?
Yep. Although Twilight probably isn't going to have a very positive opinion of him, I don't want to give away too much but there are going to be ponies that like him and some that really don't. Twi is one of those categories.... but which one? She don't like him
I must say the first few chapters were okay but after this one things look more promising
8266086
Thank you. I've been trying my best to improve and read good stories to model after so I'm glad to see that it's working.
After having read everything released so far i must say that i genuinely like this story and i am excited to see how events will unfold,
Good job Mr Photon
This is probably the best chapter so far and while there are many things i would like to comment about i will for now only say that i really like your characterization of Rarity, in most HiE fics Rarity is either super open and generous or she is completly disgusted by the human, but i like that in this fic she is reasonably apprehensive towards Hank, but she is still resonable and generous (heh) in thought to atleast see a another point of view. Like and fave
Not bad, a bit of a rough start which promises worse but it comes out a much better in later chapters. Will be nice to see what is to come.
8367387
Meh, personally? I have seen so many fics in which Twilight went against the human for petty reason and those ended being amazing stories! So, yeah. Meh. I'm with you on the "All bark and no bite" thou. But, if Celestia is against him the chances of Twilight having a similar view are pretty damn high too.
P.S. I do enjoy this story, can't wait to see what the future have in store for Hank.
PS.S. Thinking about adding the other beings living in Equestria? Cause the movie kinda went ballistic on the adding of Mareponies, Anthro Cats, etc. Which all of those were things made by the fanbase and had quite the culture in the "Diaries of a madman" which is one of the best stories in the fanbase that continues being updated.
P.S.S.S. Yep, fucking love this story.
First off, it is blatantly obvious that you have never handled a real gun. Nobody and I mean, NOBODY who has handled a shotgun calls shotgun shells anything but shells. Second, that many weapons on one person is excessive and would weigh you down, give you blisters, and make a fair bit of noise. Putting a magazine in a boot would result either in the magazine falling out, or rubbing your ankle raw. The depiction of combat was not terrible, but it could use some work. In any life or death struggle, people fight HARD on both sides. Also, having a Smith & Wesson .357 Magnum myself, I can twll you it is tricky at best to move it around in your hand like that. It takes a GREAT deal of practice to do it smoothly and since there is no safety on it, doing it loaded is almost as likely to shoot yourself by accident. The depiction of the main character's other gear seems much more realistic and reasonable. Alice Pack, good call. I own an older one myself and they are fantastic if you know how to pack them. The duster, not a terrible idea because the fabric would help to ward off bites and so forth, but it would be REALLY hot on warm days. Still very useful though. I suppose my biggest hangup was the number of weapons he has. One main rifle or shotgun, one back-up hand gun (chest rig is a better idea than a shoulder rig), and the hatchet and knife. Otherwise is it overkill. A good Bowie knife can function as a hatchet and knife and has other purposes as well. I am curious why he did not have a pocket tool or a small bag of tools. If he has to get into places, those things would be handy.
Overall, more realistic than most others I have seen. Not bad. Continuing on.
I have only two things to pick this chapter:
1. The Human teeth and jaw do not pack enough strength to break through the material of a duster unless it is in truly terrible condition (as in literally falling apart).
2. The Human skull is much harder to pierce than movies and television depict. With a square blow to a flat-ish portion of the head, you might be able to puncture it with a screwdriver. Most knives would either break or glance off the bone and would still require some significant strength.
Don't really have anything to bitch about for this chapter except the truly odd coincidence about his house and humvee both somehow landing upright. Other than that and the lack of languaga barrier (but that might just be more of a personal preference) I really don't have any reason to dislike this chapter at all.
Immediately stunned with the amazing taste I began to greedily take gulp after gulp of water only stopping when I ran out of breath. “Oh god is that good!” I exclaim wiping my mouth dry, “I should bottle and sell this stuff! Well I should probably filter it first, just watch I’m gonna get a damned parasite or somethin’..... Oh well, worth it.”.
Helloooooooooo dysentery. Nah, mostly kidding. I ended up having my characters doing the same thing in my story.
Your King's Merrey Olde English needs some work.
That line made me chuckle. It should be, "What hast thee done to our leg?"
Only thing I found online was a Shakespeare translator and now I see how amusing it is that you point it out. I'll come back to this and fix it sometime. May be a while though old English is not my forte, obviously.
Considering the situation Hank found himself in switching the engine and tranny wouldn't be out of the question. It would be extremely logical. Also I am sure a multifuel option has been considered for situations where Diesel isn't readily available. That is something most surival stories tend to ignore or gloss over. Both gasoline and diesel tend to have issues over the long term. Diesel can jell and gas can go stale
8398279
I'll wait and see on the movie but if you accept somehow G1 and G4 ponies are connected then anthro cats and merponies were already there just not shown in the latest version
I only have one problem with this story, there is not enough of it.
8411597
I apologize, I'm starting on the new chapter now though so don't fret!
8411597 Ditto. This is pretty good. Dash's hate is to be expected. Twilight's is saddening, but more or less understandable. I can see it. Celestia's take on it though is a bit striking. One would think that with her experience, she would be more curious and a bit less judgemental. The caution, well DUH! He's capable and lethal and not afraid of much except being truly open with folks about his past. Given the hints at some of the things he's experienced, that's understandable too. Honestly, aside from a few things in the first few chapters and the occasional spelling error, I find myself very much drawn to and enjoying this story. As my Campbell Clan Scottish ancestors would say, 's noo bad'.
If the main OCs in this story were voiced, what would they sound like?
8468860
For Hank I imagine a deep baritone voice that doesn't show emotion too well. He's also from the midwest and as you know has Scottish and Irish parents, so a whole mess of weird accents.
For Clover I'd have to say Eastern U.S. And he is from Filly delphia so that whole deal.
Hope this cleared some stuff up for you. :)
Thank you for using my idea.
an errand*
cue*
you made this mistake twice.
Those were what really stuck out enough for me to mention.
8469258
No problemo it was a great one, I thank you for suggesting it.
8469298
Thank you I will get on those.
I hope he can't transmit the virus to the ponies, viruses don't get killed out of your body like bacteria do. Viruses in all likelihood will stay with you for the rest of your life.
8536996
He can't. I thought about that too but I decided that I didn't want the story to go in that direction. The virus is actually only communicable to humans, all other animals on earth were left unaffected, other than being food for the infected. I'm going to explore this point in the story, don't know when yet but eventually.
8538576
That's a relief. The last story I read that did that was a l4d2 crossover with Ellis in pony land. It got dark in a way that was no fun to read and so I stopped reading it. At least with the creepypasta type of dark the world will keep going, but Ellis literally brought the apocalypse.
8538988
Yeah I've read stories that take that route, and while some like it, I certainly don't. There's still gonna be plenty of fighting but I'm not going to have infected show up in equestria and start killing off ponies while Hank has to fight the infected again.
I guess that "nanomachines" bacteria (you know, because of the inexplicable regeneration that should be impossible because cell quality gets worse as dna degrades through repeated cell devision. Also, the cells that directly cause nerve impulses when stimulated by vibrations don't replicate themselves after the organ is fully formed.) might flush that virus out. Also, if his senses, and by extension cell quality and dna "durability", are getting better, wouldn't he not age and live until killed?
The organ I'm talking about is your cochlea btw
8539142
That could be possible over time and touching on the fact of the symbiotic bacteria in his body now I haven't really decided, he can still die from blood loss, for example if a main artery is cut or burst, also if a major organ is punctured or critically damaged and any physical way. Trauma in general can get him, he's not like dead pool or anything.
That being said he won't be getting any cold or flus, and other sicknesses of the sort. The bacteria does indeed speed healing and coagulation while making repairs to it's host too ensure it's own survival and it may extend Hanks life and slow aging to a point, but grandfather time will still eventually claim him as well. I don't believe it would make sense, not that it does now, for the bacteria to have the ability to completely stop telomere degradation that would be even more hard to believe than it is now.
8539261
It's a magic bacteria though. The --how-- it does that is explained by saying "magic" and doing jazz hands. It's shown effects would indicate it has solved aging for your protagonist, though. And in theory the effect would last until the bacteria evolves enough to lose it's regenerative properties.
I wasn't even thinking about the injury healing.
I was just going off the fact that it can heal parts of him that can only degrade.
8539384
I get how it makes sense for him to be biologically immortal like a lobster, but for the bacteria to mess with telomeres it would have to do things at the chromosomal level. You bring up some good points and have made me reconsider a few things but for the time being the bacteria just as a immune system boost and speeds healing while preventing infection, not stopping infection, but preventing it.
This all may change in the future when I do some more research on aging and things on the cellular level, and even though magic jazz hands is a common excuse in these stories I would prefer to go at it with some thought and try to make sense of it all.
8539787
That's cool. To me Princess Luna is "best pone" so I like to read stories where the protagonist gets immunity to old age. It helps with the scourge that is shipping if one of the shipped won't outlast the other.
I am grinning right now. Thanks for acknowledging the reality and writing this in there. I assume it was for my benefit and I thank you, good sir. Also, BOWS ROCK! I was a three time student state champion competition shooter in Traditional Instinctive style archery.
8542595
You made some insightful points, I even went as far to put a little, un loaded of course, 22 in my boot for a few hours while around the house. It was very uncomfortable and did indeed irritate the sensitive skin of the ankle.
And thank you for the feed back on every chapter so far, feedback helps me more than you know.
Also Three time student state champion? Damn. I only shoot in my free time with a old compound I have, I want to get a recurve though. I feel like it will be more satisfying to hit targets unassisted by pulleys and sights.
8542707 My first recurve was a LUCKY break. It was a custom job that somebody else never pocked up so I was able to snag it for just under $400.00
This is definitely one of the best fics I've seen on this site.
Makes me happy
8574548
Don't know about 'the best' but I really appreciate the compliment. I'm glad you've liked what ever you've read so far.
I think it could work just no overbearing harems alright?