When an accidental discovery turns into something more, dark forces soon arrive in Ponyville and the rest of Equus is soon pulled into a terrible battle for not only the survival of equinekind but ultimately all worlds survival as well. When friends and loved ones can become enemies, and your closest confidants could possibly turn on you, who is really on the side of heroes, anti-heroes and villains? Who really will survive?
(A Kamen Rider Dragon Knight crossover with an alternate season 5 universe with background ponies as the focus)
Chapters (1)
Not masterfully written overall: of note, I caught a sentence essentially saying "she tried to wake him up by trying something to wake him up"; also, the paragraph separation could be better at times. Still, there's enough of a story peeking through to stick around and follow. Consider me on board.
>Be me
>Read Title
>Expect Xcom 2 Crossover
>Sheer Disappointment abound
BioniclesaurKing4t2, thanks for your input and letting me know of a problem in my writing (I wasn't expecting this to be one of the great MLP crossover fics but it's good that people are interested in it and willing to tell me some constructive criticism) and do you think I should try to get an editor for this fic? I wasn't sure I needed one, but they way you're wording things what's your opinion?
7908850
As someone who's always done their own editing during the writing of the story itself, I'm not sure of my authority on the matter of telling someone to get an editor.
Hmm I'm gonna critique this as best as I can, but so far, I have to say that the pace feels a bit off and the ton of exposition, while I understand its purpose to inform those unfamiliar with Dragon Knight, is rather distracting from the flow of the story. I suggest trimming it down a little.
That's the best way I can put my impressions on this. That said, I'm intrigued by what you have planned for this. And also because I was a fan of Dragon Knight.
8912633
I appreciate your constructive criticism, instead of just telling to me don't write crossovers as some people have said. This is both (as stated) my first attempt at an MLP fic and an MLP Crossover. Right now it may going briefly on hiatus because of real life issues. It has not been abandoned however. Suggestions on how to improve, I'll gladly take.
Wait a moment. You're giving the Advent Decks to ponies even less deserving of that power than the ones Shiro Kanzaki gave to?
And if no one knows who that is, watch the real Kamen Rider Ryuki (what Dragon Knight is based on).
9423589
I had a little bit of trouble finding out who he's giving the Advent Decks to. I watched Kamen Rider Dragon Knight, and I researched Ryuki too thanks to the YouTuber Marcosatsu doing a History of Kamen Rider Series. So who's getting the Advent Decks that are unworthy? Because as far as I can tell, the decks aren't present yet.
9699783
The Advent Decks never should have existed too begin with. So I feel no one deserves to have them. But that's just me.
9699881
Well, that was kind of the whole point of Ryuki's ending. Plus, almost everyone in that show was either annoying, an asshole, or an idiot. Then again, I wouldn't call Ryuki, the show or the main rider, true Kamen Riders. It's part of why I picked Dragon Knight to base a future project of mine on.
Wonder if this fic will continue? Its pretty interesting.
Is there anything planned for Spike too?