• Member Since 16th Feb, 2016
  • offline last seen 9 hours ago

booksmart


Published Author looking to expand out side of hit comfort zone by wirting from different perspectives with input from others with the risk of personal jugement.

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After Rainbow Dash left to become a Wonderbolt Applejack finds herself working too hard and slipping into depression in the absents of her marefriend. After a hard year an near catastrophic breakup Applejack and Rainbow Dash struggle to pick up the pieces while the girls deal with their own relationships.

A big thanks for Doughnot_followmoi for all their help with editing this piece.

My first attempt at a fanfic please comment I want to improve as much as I can!

No I do not own the cover art.

Chapters (18)
Comments ( 32 )

I'm kind of surprised that no one has commented on this story so far...I guess I'll be the first. I think the plot of the story is great and I like how you leave me wanting to read more after each chapter. I personally love the sides romances and other conflicts outside the appledash. Just cuz I'm a sucker for the stuff :pinkiecrazy:. My only compliant about this story is the grammar. I know you said your not worried about it right now but you should go back and proofread. It makes the story harder to enjoy when your constantly stumbling over errors. Besides that, its pretty good for your first story.

(Sorry if I don't go into detail, this is actually my first time criticizing anybody's work) :twilightblush:

On another note...ain't Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo just adorable! :scootangel:

Like you said, grammer isn't what makes a story good. You have a really good story here, but I think that proofreading it would make it better than it already is.
I would even be happy to help you out with that if you'd like...even if i'm not exacly sure what im doing.
But I hope to see more very soon!

Damn Rarity, you made that situation awkward really quick. :raritywink:

aliecron mussels...:twilightblush:
Seems like I missed two...alicorn and muscles.
Sorry. I'll double check next time.

7003027
Fixed those errors and I finally have a understanding of how to spell Alicorn!:twilightsmile:
Thanks for the help.

Applejack struggled to catch her breath. She didn’t think Dash would like her father walking in on them in this position let alone knowing about them at all, “Dash Granny’s in the kitchen–”

“I’ve told you, she doesn’t really care about it,” Dash interrupted running her hoof through Applejack’s mane, “I thought you we were going spend time together today?”

“Dash I–”

“Rainbow Dash!” a stallion's voice boomed behind them. The weight on top of Dash quickly vanished as the pegasus flew up and banged her head on the ceiling.

“DAD!?” she shrieked.

Smooth Dash. Real Smooth.

“Twilight dear,” Rarity called, trying to end the scene that was attracting a few spectators. Twilight then seemed to take note of where she was. Her face lit up in an adorable blush but the anger behind her eyes was still clear.

The Princess of Friendship looked at her assistant, “Enjoy your marefriend Spike,” she spat, “You can find somewhere else to sleep till I cool off.” With that, Twilight vanished

Two words for both these scenarios:

Uh - oh.:twilightoops:

No Stupid feather brain! Applejack doesn't thinking like that!

Applejack isn't thinking like that...
Or
Applejack doesn't think like that.

I can't wait for the next chapter!

ooo, I wonder what's going to happen??

This is a great chapter. And Please tell me RD is going on a date. Oh my gosh, that would be amazing!

Also, I'm really sorry I havent been able to help edit your story anymore, but if you'd still like me to, I should be free for the next couple of weeks, since it's summer and my summer program is taking a break. So if yes, Pm me, if no, sorry for letting you down.

7386396
I just sent you the link for the next Chapter. I hope your course are going well.
Thanks.
BookSmart

“This filthy mongrel of an earth pony has manipulated our daughter in a relationship,” Rainbow Blaze stated. Twilight stared at the stallion who seemed very proud of having brought what he thought was a momentous problem to a Princesses attention.

You’ve got to me kidding me.

Ok, that got my up vote. XD

Does this end well for Rainbow and AJ? :fluttershyouch:

“This filthy mongrel of an earth pony has manipulated our daughter in a relationship,” Rainbow Blaze stated. Twilight stared at the stallion who seemed very proud of having brought what he thought was a momentous problem to a Princesses attention.

Geez, is Rainbow's dad mega-stupid, or what?!:facehoof:
(That's actually a rhetorical question, folks.)

I foresee a Twilight explosion at the featherbrained bigots (i.e., Rainbow's idiot parents) incoming.

Preferably in the next chapter.

You’ve got to me kidding me.

Little typo :twilightsheepish:

I'm with Twi on this one.

this was a good chapter xD

I'm with Dash :rainbowlaugh:

I had a few instances when I did want to comment but this story is too complex to be able to really comment anything productive (which is how I used the comment section).

I do like the complexity though, its a nice change from the simpler one-shots i usually find.

I was hopping something like this would happen.:pinkiehappy:

What is it with Rainbow Dash and rape? It like the most popular background story she has in fanfics.

I think she is going to a club to pump herself full of alcohol and then get raped, again. Because that is the tradition for Rainbow Dash.:ajbemused:

OMGoodness! I can't stop laughing:rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh: This so hilarious!:rainbowlaugh:

MORE PLEASE!!!!

One mistery solve and a new one! Onwards!!!

Comment posted by Nira Lightshine deleted Aug 14th, 2018

Is this story complete or not?

Comment posted by booksmart deleted Sep 2nd, 2018

9146401

Oops sorry my bad. I forgot to update the status. The story is unfortunately finished. I have updated it now.

Thanks for pointing that out!

I swear Cadence and Pinkie are related.

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