You are Anon, and you've received another letter from Applejack. You're not going to reply to this one, just as you refused to reply to the many letters she had sent you over the years. Unfortunately, Applejack isn't going to let you ignore her any longer. Maybe it's about time you two had a talk.
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Just a short one-shot greentext I wrote a few days ago after seeing an interesting writing prompt. Decided to touch it up and turn it into prose form so I could post it here.
EDIT: Wow, I didn't expect this story to get so many hits in such little time. Thank you to all who read it! Consider giving it a thumbs up (or down)!
Chapters (1)
Adele + Pony literature...Not bad, not bad at all. Thumbs up!
T'was nice. I liked it, I'm a sucker for sad romances.
6869739
Thanks, friend. Fixed those along with a few other typos I caught. Man, and just when you thought proofreading three times was enough. Glad you enjoyed it by the way!
This..... I don't know.
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Care to clarify? I can't tell whether you enjoyed it or not. By all means, if you didn't like it don't be afraid to say so.
6870314 I'm on the fence.
6870315
Ah, gotchya.
The original greentext I wrote was kind of on the spot and written in just a few hours, so I'm not surprised some people might not dig the story. Plus, I'm sure some people are far past bored with most HiE/AiE stories by this point.
6870328 No it's not that. It's.... the ending and where it went. You promised romance but I feel cheated out of it.
6870330
Interesting, I got the complete opposite reaction when I originally posted it. Perhaps that's just due to the difference in reader mentality, though. I kinda wanted to take it in a direction some people might not expect. Maybe that would have worked better without the second person perspective though. Ah well, ya live ya learn.
Plus, this story was vaguely inspired by my own real world experiences. I wrote this straight from the heart. Still, I can understand being on the fence about where it turned up in the end. Either way I'm just glad you read it.
This hit me very hard, I've been through what Anon has suffered, except the person was very cruel about it. Begging to take a person back never works, and when someone shatters your trust like that, it never can truly be brought back. Even if they want you back, what they did will always haunt you and make you paranoid (for good reason). I'm glad Anon stuck to his guns, but we should tread carefully. I've been through the friends with ex-gf thing and I do NOT recommend it to anyone! Good story man, instant upvote.
6870342 This hit me straight in the heart, I too have had pretty much the same stuff happen to me that Anon went through. Glad he said no to getting back. My ex tried the sob routine, and I hated it.
I can't really quite see why he'd want to be friends with her after this. If anything, he has more reason to be angry than before. She never says why she actually broke up with him and she never so much as apologizes for it if she really didn't have a good reason. She tells her story and doesn't even seem to see the obvious parallels there. It seems so blatantly egotistic of her.
This was a great fic, but i am a bit dissapointed that Applejack didn't tell him why she ended their relationship, sure he told her he knew why she broke up with him, but it would have been nice if she herself explained to him why she did it.
Also, i knew it wasn't her intention, but the message i got from Applejack when she met up with him again was
"Sure i broke up with you, and i had this awsome time with Another Stallion, but i felt it really didn't work out so we broke up, and that really bummed me out, so i thought, hey, i should try to go for you again!"
That aside, a nice read this was, keep it up!
6870743 Dude, welcome to women! The majority are actually like that! This fix is just super in capturing that train of thought.
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Considering I'm probably old enough to be your father and still think this is unusually self-absorbed, I think I'm gonna have to disagree.
6870743
I didn't really want to end the fic on a depressing note. I was more going for bittersweet. Plus, its implied that the two were inseperable friends before they started dating. Hence why Anon is as forgiving as he is when he finally sees AJ again after so long. You definitely have valid points though, and it probably could have been handled better if I took more time to write it. Thanks for the feedback!
6870743 I can. I've been there. On the outside, it's easy to think rationally with a clear head and understand when an individual avoids responsibility for their wrong doing in a relationship. But when you're that person who was in it, you remember the positives and the connections you made. Your brain remembers that and triggers your feelings of love. Putting your emotional stock in an individual is a very risky thing and trust is an essential part of it.
Sometimes it's simply hard to move on and you'll always want to remember the good things, which explains Anon's struggle. But you're right, it was incredibly selfish of Applejack to want him back when she dropped him like a brick of shit. She wanted the benefits of keeping his company and expecting him to give her extra emotional needs. People who do this are selfish. Notice I didn't say just women. I've seen asshole guys do the same.
Anon was right for leaving, small towns are difficult to live when you go through this type of thing. Totally avoided responsibility and my ex did the same when she wanted me back after avoiding me for almost a year. A guy would get no sympathy for doing this, as he should. No reason why she should either. Anon is going to have to be careful, women or mares in this case, can be awfully tempted to use sex to entice you back!
I approve. Take my like, fav and a follow.
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Glad it was helpful. In all honesty, I think there should be more stories like this in general. Everything is always those happy-sappy shipfics where everything always works out in the end, no matter how little sense it makes. Life is rarely actually that convenient, though. There's not much in the way of well-written tragic romances that reflect this, though, despite those being often enough the much more interesting type to both read and write.
Incidentally, I think that Anon's decision in the story was very much the mature one - this kind of thing really hardly ever works out if you try. You haven't changed, your ex hasn't changed, whatever made the relationship fail in the first place hasn't changed and under the bottom line, it's really just wishful thinking that's doomed to fail and ultimately just hurt everyone involved more. He made the sensible choice there, even if he wasn't still feeling some personal resentment for her over it.
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I suppose I can sympathize with that. No one is really at their best when it comes to making that kind of decision. It probably would've been more appropriate to say that I think he should be more angry now than before, based just on what's actually being said (and not said) in that conversation.
My goodness, this FIC hit me in the feels all over. Great writing.
aww man. i mis-read the last line. i thought it said "the mare you'd never see again." it'd be kinda a bastard move.
but this got to me, bro. at least you didn't have him go the pity sex route.
Applejack seems all over the place emotionally in this story.
Other than that, not bad.
Goddamn i wish i read this fic a while back. Real good job man i was dreading reading the conclusion since it seemed like you were gonna go the cliche/ bad writing route of making anon throw out reason and negative feelings because " im too damn stupid and in love" and forgive AJ right then and there. Real glad you went the bittersweet way.
Most people go with the "human forgive everything cos i i hate sad stuff" kind of stories. I really like stories that are about rejection or break ups. Not many do it right and just go with straight up romance and it makes the point of having a rejection or break up pointless. Great stuff dude you get a fave and follow for this.
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Thank you for your kind words :)
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I would like to point out that I had the opposite experience that you had. I had three long term girlfriends on my short life. Two of them are still friends of mine, and good ones, better than we were before we dated.
6903555 Glad you were able to work it out. Hopefully that won't be an issue when you date again.
6903610
My friends, my past, my dreams, my ideals are part of me. If a date doesn't like them, they were not meant for me to begin with. But thanks for your wishes. I too hope better experiences for you too.
This seems to move a little too quickly.
It feels like the reconciliation between Anon and AJ came a bit too easy, especially after the focus on how heartbroken Anon still was.
Now I'm not objecting to them becoming friends again, I've been lucky to have remained friends with my girlfriends after breaking up with them, even if it sometimes took a bit of time, so I can fully appreciate and sympathize with the situation you're presenting.
I suppose what I'm trying to say, in my roundabout way, is that I kinda wished the story had went on a bit longer.
Anon just felt kinda bitter and sad, so the ending feels like it could have gone on for longer. That's the main point; it's mostly the ending that could have used a bit of expanding, just to make their reignited friendship flow a bit more naturally. His acceptance also seems a little rushed considering we never get to know exactly why AJ actually did dump him, since she denied being ashamed of him, and also that for a moment, she seemed to be looking to Anon to be her rebound guy; even if that wasn't her intention, I know from experience that that feeling can sting.
I'm not saying I didn't enjoy reading this though. In fact, I gave it a well-deserved thumbs up. Because despite what I've said, I think it's well-written and -excepting what I said about the ending- it's very well-paced. Anon's plight and emotions are understandable and relatable. I'm glad that you didn't have them just get back together, instead focusing on the harsh realities of a damaged relationship without it getting too heavy and showing that you can work around it and at least remain friends.
And I love that you didn't demonize AJ, as is often common with break-up stories when depicting the one who did the dumping, and even though I still would have liked to have gone deeper into her reasons for ending the relationship, I still feel enough sympathy for her to keep her from the stereotypical "callous-ex-who-only-realized-what-she-had-after-she-lost-it"-troupe.
Most importantly though, your story made me think, very long. That is something that makes more of an impression on me than almost anything else.
I hardly ever comment on stories, almost never; I feel that I'm bad at it, probably because I have some social anxieties, and I hate giving critique because it makes me feel kinda mean. But those few stories that really catches my attention and makes me think, I find that I can't let it go and I just feel like I have to say something.
That's how much your fic caught my interest.
Think it's about time I wrap this up. Thank you for your time and a good read. Wish you the best.
I live by the quote "If you love something let it go, if it comes back to you it's yours if it doesn't it never was." This was a good yet sad story
i hate you dude! you made me cry!
woot!
O-OH GOD! The Heart Break!
I'm tearing up here... Please tell me there's a sequel or at least a bloody spin off where Anon/I get back together.
alas i'm to much of a stoned hearted basterd to get any feels from this takes allot to make me cry tears at all
Dude such truth was spoken that day.
Freankin A+ for creativity and realizim on a fic about lovin a f#$!in horse...pony whatever
For all those who don't know the title reference-
Where is the version where Anon is just vicious and callous to her that she goes back home crying because of how much he hates her for breaking his heart? Where is that version? Shit this guy should be cursing and hating her for the crap she pulled, we need that version badly.
Anon is a better man than I. I would have fallen for the sobbing ex wanting me back.
Guess I haven't been burned that much by the ladies to gain insight on what to do with long term relationships.
I've only had one ex, and all of my other interactions with ladies that I'm interested in, don't make it to the point where I can get her number or I'm friend-zoned.
The current dating pool around me is non-existent (co-workers, clerks at stores you like, and waitresses at restaurants you like, are best put into a "no fly zone" since things can ONLY end badly, and the location is forever ruined and you can never go back without MASSIVE amounts of awkward).
Admittedly, I was a bit distracted by Adele in my head to fully appreciate this.
Gonna need to do a re-read.
.......
HELLO FROM THE OUTSIIIIIIIDE!
*drops to knees*
AT LEAST I CAN SAY THAT I TRIIIIIED.....
I read, and re-read this great story. I have also read all of the comments.
It is likely that this Anon will return to Ponyville and may restart his relationship with Applejack.
Because:
Anon's heart is still broken.
In Canterlon, Anon is not living; just existing. Such sadden people, living in a vastly different culture, do not live long.
However:
Anon must have another 'talk'. If the relationship gets romantic it MUST be in the open.
Applejack has hit bottom (relationship wise). Such people are not look for a rebound mate.
If she stops being in denial and realize that she was hiding her relationship with Anon, then they just might reignite their love...
Or be miserable for the rest of their lives.
It worked for me and my wife.
I think this is the most mature anon I've ever seen. I know I would have had a hard time forgiving her.
Hey I love your fanfic I really enjoyed it and I was wondering can I have your permission to write a sequel please I got a great idea for it please reply.
Well, I suppose people react differently.
Personally, I don't know which way I'd go if I were in Anon's shoes... On the one hand, you don't go back to old flames - things will never be exactly the same they were, and if you expect that, there'll only be disappointment. Semi-clean slate, or rather - starting from scratch - could help, there, but you'd both need to be in perfect agreement about preconceptions (or lack thereof) here.
On the other... you already know each other well enough, and there's that little bit about being able to skip some of the problematic bits (and you're both wiser by at least that much).
I guess if it were me, and I were to stay in Canterlot, I'd say "no"... but if circumstances placed me in Ponyville again, I might be willing to give it a shot. And for one thing, if I really wanted it to happen, I'd make circumstances place me back there. ;]
Fun fact is... nobody can say if Anon is right or wrong, here - we're out in the deep waters, and there's no one measure to grade your performance or initiative. It's honestly up to him... But they clearly had something special there, for a while, if they're both hit this hard by it. I mean, it's been years, and they're still pretty broken up about it. There was something there, and maybe it's worth exploring again.
Honestly, I gotta give respect to anon for his maturity, because I would have been so mad and not be able to forgive her.
That was a great fanfic and I will say its one of the best sad fanfic I had read well its only sad one I read but I listened to some on youtube done by narrators and voice actors