• Member Since 23rd Jan, 2015
  • offline last seen Nov 6th, 2017

StayedGolden


T

Anon Orange, coming from a pretty awful life in the city, is forced to visit his extended family in some backwoods town. Never having met them before, he's pretty uncomfortable with the notion. His arrival isn't too happy, but pretty soon he finds himself fitting in, especially with his youngest cousin, Apple Bloom. They go on adventures, sometimes with others and sometimes not, and Anon's heart begins to heal from past wounds.

Chapters (8)
Comments ( 10 )

Why is this story rated M?

I would have advised not posting all of this story at once.

Ain't nobody got time to read all this.

the only real issues i can see with this are the paragraph size (ergonomics aren't just for controllers), the fact you'd commonly "lead into" a new paragraph with an unfinished sentence, as though you were quoting the next speaker, and a few instances throughout where tenses and just who the narrator was got a little mixed up.

other than that, cool story, bro

i'm serious. its no small thing to get a reader to feel so in sync with a character's emotions, and you better believe i was grinning like an idiot toward the end

whats with the romance tag?
Theres no romance. So far. Im only on chapter 3

AAAAWW!!:rainbowkiss: THAT'S SO CUTE!!!

Wonderful read! Thank you.

Wow you made your MC creepy as all fuck in the beginning of this chapter like fuck man, Iv never seen or heard anyone act like your character does unless they were a soon to be sex offender. I was kinda okay with his character at the start of the story but you made it clear your MC has zero problems being a creep, then you have him creeping on AB then actively say shes his cousin a second later when its clear as day he gives zero fucks.

Thank you for the beautiful and sweet story, very much. It's very kind, and is a treasure.

Kissing-cousins huh? This is part on what it means to be a 'Brony?'

Login or register to comment