"Why, good day, you Equal ponies! It's yours truly, Starlight Glimmer, here to wish you a happy Hearts and Hooves Day. Yes, you know the day, the day that our culture believes that every mare needs her special stallion and all mares just LOVE chocolate, right? Right? Ah, yes, we still have days like this.
"Hearts and Hooves Day, which should be renamed due to its equine-only name, is a holiday concreted into our society. It is oppressive and intolerant towards those who have no companions and certainly those who wish for no companion. All the billboards, advertisements, stores, and little cards depict heterosexual relationships, showing that Equestria still needs diversity to be represented. Lesbian, gay, bi, interspecies and trans and not represented in such things. However, there is a even more oppressed type that is crushed and repressed by this holiday. If you do not know what I speak of, it is the asexuals.
"Hearts and Hooves Day is extremely anti-asexual. Ponies who have no attractions at all are being bullied by society to acquire a mate for the sake of a holiday. Every mare must dream about what her horny stallion is going to give her and every horny stallion must drool over what he'll give his mare. This is not the case, especially for the asexuals who are marginalized by this particular day.
"Is there a solution for this? Well, there is a solution for everything, as I say. I am a very optimistic pony. First thing we need to do is replace Hearts and Hooves Day with Heart Day. Heart Day will not celebrate sexual relationships only but non-sexual ones as well. The very special somepony doesn't have to be the one who is your marefriend or coltfriend, but it could also be your brother, your classmate, or your friend. Now everyone has a chance to be special on this day.
"Second is to remove all those bloody gifts. It is stereotyping mares that we all seem to gush over chocolate. Not only are some mares allergic to chocolate, some are vegan. By having the stores sell all sorts of fattening treats, these two major groups are bullied into eating chocolate. Since it would be hard to promote all forms of eating, we shall just promote healthy eating. That's what a government does, right?
"Third...wait....what was third? Ah yes, we-"
"Starlight, what are you doing?"
"GAH!"
Starlight turned off the camera before her and looked guiltily at Twilight and Rainbow Dash, who were standing in the doorway of her room in the castle. Both the mares in her doorway shared confused looks and held perplexed expressions. Starlight nervously rubbed the back of her neck.
"What are you doing?" Twilight repeated.
"Um...just sending a message to my followers. That's all," Starlight gulped.
"Really? Sounded like you were talking about some heavy stuff..." Rainbow commented.
"Well, you could say that. Um, why are you two here?" Starlight asked.
"Oh! It's Hearts and Hooves Day and I thought I'd give you a card. You've been shut in her room all morning and I thought to cheer you up!" Twilight explained gleefully.
Twilight walked over to the pink unicorn and magically handed her a pink and red card that said the usual "Happy Hearts and Hooves" stuff that's plastered on every Hearts and Hooves card. Starlight took it in her hoof with a frown.
"Are you saying you love me?" Starlight was confused.
"What? Oh, not like that! I do have a special somepony, but he's not close to here. I just thought to lighten up your day and to let you know that we don't hate you at all."
"But we don't like you neither," Rainbow remarked.
"Hey!" Twilight silenced her.
"I guess that's nice of you," Starlight said slowly. "But I don't celebrate this. Never have."
"And that's fine. Take the card or not, but the thought remains the same," Twilight smiled.
"Why don't ya celebrate it? Ya have to have some coltfriend, right?" Rainbow pressed.
"Nope, never have unless you go way back," Starlight answered. "But yeah, that was before. I then found out that I'm asexual, so I don't have any attractions."
"Asexual? Aren't those types of creatures that reproduce by themselves or something?" Rainbow said.
"No! Rainbow, asexuals, in this sense, are ponies or other species who have no sexual attractions. I have no coltfriend and I don't want one."
"Hmph, likely story," Rainbow giggled. "You just can't get a colt for yourself. That's what it is."
Starlight's cheeks reddened. "That's not it at all!"
"Hmph, think I struck a nerve! Haha!" Rainbow walked away while laughing.
"Ignore her. She can be...mean sometimes," Twilight sighed.
"I fully understand..." Starlight groaned.
Twilight then put her front legs around Starlight and embraced her in a hug. This took the unicorn by surprise and she tried to squirm out of the strong legs.
"Just giving you a hug, Starlight. You need one," Twilight said.
"I can file this as assault! Get off me!" Starlight yelled.
"Naw. You like it. I heard all your talks on Hearts and Hooves Day. I think you kinda forget the point of it. Yeah, I agree that it is pretty shallow these days and it's pretty sappy, but you know, it can be more than that."
"Oh? How?" Starlight was skeptical.
"It's more about showing that you can love another. I agree, it shouldn't be limited to romantic relationships. It's a day to, you know, show your love in a less subtle way. Doesn't matter who it is, if you love them, help them and give them a good day. That's why I'm hugging you now. We may disagree on tons of things, but I consider you my friend, so I'm gonna show you that I'm your friend."
"And hugging me is doing that?"
"Precisely!"
"Ugh! Fine! Just this day though..."
Starlight returned the hug and they both sat there hugging each other. She was still uncertain of the alicorn's actions, but relunctantly went along with it. Twilight was nothing but smiles and kept snugging the unicorn like she was a pillow.
"Happy Hearts and Hooves Day," Twilight said.
"Happy Hearts Day..."
=
And in one quick motion Twilight shows true love and compassion. The sad part is Starlight will probably not have this lesson sink in, yet. Happy Hearts and Hooves Day everypony! May you spend it with those who you care about!
6935760 I didn't go with Heart's and Hooves day because I wanted it to be a little more personal, but now that I think about it, it would be more personal for THEM if I did it. So....phooey.
And yes, Starlight's lesson is probably not going to sink in very much, but at least she has SOME soft side to her.
6935769
Either way you did a superb job getting your message across in this chapter. Terminology aside it was the message that mattered not a few synonyms.
That's something I always say whenever I face a problem.
Weird.
6942326 Same here. Guess it's just how we think
Aww. Starlight gets a happy ending for once! Somehow I was expecting you to zap her with a taser.
6943568 Well, tasers were banned in Equestria by misuse from the Royal Guards and one certain white Alicorn...
"Don't look at me like that. I'll do it again any day! Hehehe!"
But yes, Starlight is not some punching bag. She has feelings too!
6943613
i have to admit I find that hard to believe. No offense but you might take offense, see what I did there? I pulled a Zecora! But all seriousness, I really thought you got a kick out of making Starlight into a punching bag. This fic is funny but I really thought that's why you wrote this.
But it was nice seeing Starlight get hugged... until she ticks someone off again. You should do Zebra History Month.
Also Bad Tia!
6943625 Well, this may surprise you, but Starlight is in my top five of favorite characters and my favorite villain. So yeah....I started writing this because of the Mizzou Protests. Starlight just was the closest character to those whiners and so, I used her!
I know she definitely IS a punching bag in this fic that rivals Spike in the the actual show, but I don't want to have the same exact formula of Starlight says something ridiculously PC and then gets beat up for it in some hilarious fashion. That's why I have the equalist ponies as well. But above all, I want all the characters to be IN character. Even though I take Luna and basically write her Andy Price comic book version. I doubt Twilight would just crap on Starlight for not agreeing with Hearts and Hooves Day (though Rainbow could). Twilight is still the Princess of Friendship and should act like it.
But yes, I do the kicks out of having characters beat the you-know-what out of each other, but I definitely don't want that to be in every chapter. If I want this to be some South Park-esque fiction, I might as well go all routes.
6946660 Starlight is messed up, but isn't the "alicorn rule only" system worse than that?!?! I mean....no diversity....
6943613 That's offensive to people who don't have feelings, you bigot!
6951938 Isn't being offended a feeling?
6954778 a feeling....of righteousness!
6954778 It's the thought that counts.
It is also offensive to those who do not possess hearts.
media-cache-ec0.pinimg.com/736x/20/cc/57/20cc57c299d549fe8e06e3260d169fb7.jpg
6954778 Claiming that one must possess feelings to feel is offensive to non-cerebrate organisms! They feel with localized ganglia and dispersed neural networks, but lack the central nervous systems you elitist vertebrates bought with your 1% riches!
*Bivalves, echinoderms, porifera and cnidarians all stage a protest march... but none arrive since they can't move very fast or survive on land...*