The Great and Powerful Trixie-Tones

by overlord-flinx

Chapter 1: Breaking Up (facts) and Making Up (stories).

Magic? Yes-yes, I, The Great and Powerful Trixie believe in it. Half near everyone at Canterlot High has to at this point. But even if a she-demon spouting hot air and slinging sparking spells hadn't blow up the front of our school; even if three soul-sucking harpies or whatever they were calling themselves didn't come out from the blue to try and turn us all against each other; even if the Great and Powerful Trixie hadn't seen her classmates sprout pony ears out from the tops of their heads-- Even if ALL of this never happened, the Great and Powerful Trixie would still believe in magic. Why? Why, what other force in the world could produce something as show-stoppingly astounding as moi? Someone as brilliant, talented, divine, graceful, and with such stage presence. Surely none can hope to be such a brilliantly glowing trifecta of perfection. But, modesty aside... Magic. Oh, yes. Magic.

Normally, the Great and Powerful Trixie would just ignore someone else trying to use magic to out perform her in anything. The Great and Powerful Trixie sees no competition when she's simply the best at it. BUT! Oh-ho-ho-ho, but indeed. Normally, the Great and Powerful Trixie isn't ROBBED! Robbed of her night in the spotlight! Robbed of her just reward! Robbed of... VICTORY! The Great and Powerful Trixie never takes such a travesty like some layabout. I am NOT second best; I am a six course meal, not burnt toast! So... The Great and Powerful Trixie forced principal Celestia to hold another battle of the bands! With prizes, true tests of skill, and no evil harpies to steal the spotlight from The Great and Powerful Trixie! She, of course, agreed... Pay no mind to the ramblings of the rest of the students that will tell you that there was a petition for all of that. The Great and Powerful Trixie stands by the fact she did it all by herself.

And you can't prove her otherwise.

Now, the Great and Powerful Trixie would usually avoid subjecting herself to this sort of mediocrity again. But... As it turns out, Principal Celestia has thrown down a gauntlet this time around that the Great and Powerful Trixie cannot ignore. A prize that only The Great and Powerful Trixie can truly enjoy. It would be an outright defiance against nature itself if she ignored this call or even let another lay their hands on such a glorious prize. Surely, only Trixie alone can collect this prize so meant for her...

"--winner will receive a year supply of Peanut Butter Crackers."

...There can be no compromise... I sooo want this. However, now I run into a very big wall. You see, while the Great and Powerful Trixie did sweep away the competition last time around; this time, Trixie is all alone. Last time she had her Illusions to provide music and backup to her wonderful singing and guitar playing; but now she is without Illusions. I told the two of them I would require their assistance yet again, but noooooo. They had to "go study" and "go to collage"; selfish. But, no matter... The Great and Powerful Trixie will just simply start a new band. A band much greater than the last. And, dare I say, more powerful?

Victory shall be mine. ALL MINE! MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

---

Oh, hollowing discourse, for what err didst I do onto this blemished world to hark upon my bones the sundering of flesh and sinew? Nay dost the night raven call the sweet ambrosia of that whispered name I once treasured; leaving now but the plucked torture of the starved crow and its murder to tear my flesh and leave my body stripped. Stripped of bone, of blood, of love and of heart. I ask my dissenter once more upon faded lips; hollowing discourse, for what err didst I do onto this blemished world to hark upon my bones the sundering of flesh and sinew? To what ends didst I cast my own existence to weeping murmurs and deafening screams? Near and now, my only solace, the sweet ichor of the slaughtered cow to wash away my thoughts and my dreary existence. For I knew no love, like hers...

...I think I drank a little too much there. Blah! What does it matter? I'm so alone... SO ALONE! The world is CRUEL and UNFORGIVING! Like a stray cat living in a cardboard box... What's that even mean!? I don't even know anymore! The world is flat, left is right, cheese is green, and I'm wearing SOCKS! Nothing makes sense anymore! Urrrr... Ohhh... Pull yourself together, Lyra. The next battle of the bands is starting up -like- the day after tomorrow if tomorrow was today... So, I got -what?- three days? No? One day...? Eh, who cares... I wasn't gonna win anyway. NOPE! I can't PLAY with a broken heart.

BON-BON! Why'd you do me like this!? I don't even wanna live anymore, why would I want to play bass or anything? Bonny... I miss my Bonny! But she's gone...! All the way in France on an exchange tour! She leaves me all alone with so French kid. Get outta here, Frenchy! Tryin' to take Bon-Bon's place... YOU CAN'T FILL THE VOID! NOTHING CAN! Except maybe my milk. Milk numbs the pain... SO MUCH PAIN! Oh... Oh the pain... Sad Lyra. So sad...

B-But... HOPE! Yeah, hope. That battle of the bands thingy-ma-boopy. V.P. Luna posted up on the wall some of the benefits of doing it. I could snore off all the extra curricular points you get... BUT! But. But... Right here, listen to this: "Higher probability of being accepted into exchange programs"...

Bonny! Lyra's comin' home! Keep the croissants and fries warm for me! But, uh... I think I'll need a team first... Pretty sure I can't rock the school all on my own. Last time I had Bon to help... Oh... There goes my sadness again... BON-BON!

---

If you want something, you try. Simple, easy, to the point. You don't shy around it, you don't duck the issue, you don't send someone else to do it for you. You just pick up all that you are and charge in at your goal in a bull-rush. All cards on the table, no room for dancing around it. You just... Do it. Confront it, wrestle it down, and swallow your pride. That's my advice to anyone and everyone. I mean, look at this battle of the bands. Last time, I didn't go for it at all. Because I just wasn't interested in it. I mean, look at me. I'm an athlete, not a musician. But, after seeing what I saw on that stage last time... Well, I think it's time for me to blow off the dust on my old guitar and see if I still have that old Spitfire charm. I could care less about the prizes or the glory of it all... I just want to play up against the Rainbooms. That Rainbow Dash's got the stuff of a champion... So I wanna see what happens when titans clash. No other reason needed.

...They said there's gonna be free food at sign up. I want free food! But I can't go alone... So I asked Spitfire to team up with me. She can play all her music stuff, and I get the free food. OH! I hope there's a taco bar... This is gonna be so fun! WOOO!

Comments

[Tatsurou]

Nice start!

But...where's the fifth member?

[overlord-flinx]

5127833 We'll get to that. But there's a reason why Vinyl doesn't talk here.

[Tatsurou]

5127837
...wasn't she mute in the movie? I keep hearing about that...

[ConningOfficer]

Okay, loving the setup! Now, I have to (like everyone else)..... wait for it.... there's always a surprise when Trixie is involved. I just know you have a hysterically funny one ready to go.

[Hidden Scorpius XI]

Near and now, my only solace, the sweet ichor of the slaughtered cow to wash away my thoughts and my dreary existence.

What a beautiful way to say "Lyra is eating her heart out on burgers"
*growl* ...
I'm hungry now.

Great start, buddy.

[Raistlin]

I liked more the original version.

[overlord-flinx]

5128251 Sadly, the original is out dates and near unusable.

[ColdGoldLazarus]

Huh, interesting start. This should be good...

[the frank]

How did you get this idea? I mean... you started writing "the original" last july and it was a premonition of at least 1/3 of the movie... are you psychic?

Anyways, loved the original, and I love this.

[RK_Striker_JK_5]

Good start on this.

[Mooncalf]

Starting out well. Shame about having to give up the first story, but I'm certain second try's a winner. And I do agree that Trixie was totally robbed. But this time the Rainbooms won't have their walking purple deus ex machina to cheat, so nothing can go wrong. Ganbatte yo!*

5128018 It's worse than that... she's binging on milk!

*Japanese for 'May your enemies suffer burning blades though their guts and their bicycles claimed by soulless repo men'. Japanese is a nasty language.

[Karzox]

It's a shame the originals gone; it was one of those stories I wanted to read, but always got lost in the sea that is my read later list.

Well 'Nil Desperandum'. Least with you remaking it I now have no excuse to not read it. Not a bad first introduction to the whole story. Sets the characters up nicely and Lyra's section made me laugh quite a bit.

I await the next installment eagerly!

[ShadowLDrago]

THis should be fun.