• Published 20th Jun 2014
  • 2,393 Views, 109 Comments

The Last Keeper of Harmony - Rammy



Spike wants to know his destiny, what his role is. The price to be paid to find out may be too high...

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15
 109
 2,393

Epilogue/Sequel

Three Keepers sat upon a roof of a building watched the setting of the sun.

"Beautiful isn't it?" Harmony admiring the shifting colors.

"Enjoy it while it lasts. With the Nameless One now released upon this world for some it will be their last." Golden Heart spoke chilling the air a bit.

"Do you have any ideas on what to we should do?" Harmony asked turning to address Golden Heart.

"I have some but for now I want to think of this sunset before the darkness that will come soon enough." Golden Heart responded still staring out at the sunset.

Silence again overtook them. Only until long after the sun had set that one spoke.

"Sadly the sequel will not have me tagged as a character." Discord quipped

"He of Laughter!" Golden Heart growled, Harmony laughed.


End of Book 1

Author's Note:

The world darkens. But there are few left who have the strength to combat it. While dragons have the power to aid in tipping the tide they are of little help. Outside of the dragon migration dragons tend to be a fractured and solitary. Golden Heart, a Spark Dragon and the Dragon Keeper of Harmony, has a lot of work ahead of him. For if he doesn’t succeed all could be lost.

Golden Heart is not alone the alicorn Harmony the only pony who has ever been "friends" with dragons will join him in his quest to get the dragons to cooperate. However a change is coming for him that will test his resolve for his adopted people.

Hopefully Golden Heart and Harmony have enough time to prepare for whatever is coming.

Comments ( 9 )

(Before I give a review, I want to apologize for taking so long to respond! My occupation keeps me quite busy...)

This review is brought to you on behalf of the group: http://www.fimfiction.net/group/197295/authors-helping-authors

Name of Story: The Last Keeper Of Harmony

Grammar Score: 7/10

Pros:

- Spike's one of the major characters. I don't really like him, but that doesn't mean he doesn't deserve the spotlight on him.

-It's got originality! The Dragon Culture and going into detail of why Discord went evil (and the fact that he used to be one of the good guys to begin with is a nice touch).

Cons:

-Grammar and Typos...there's a lot of them throughout the story. It was enough to kind of mess up the story for me.

-The Author notes: You give away what happens in the next chapter, and it messes up reading it. The fact that we know Spike 'died' before we even get to read it is a kill joy (not that him dying is good). Just let your story do it's thing and hey, if people don't know what's going to happen next, they're more opt to hang around and wait for the next chapter.

Notes: This story has good potential, and if you just make a few tweaks and kinks to it, it can turn into something even greater!
And no matter the negativity you may get, just keep your head up and don't worry about them. Half the people talking bad don't even write stories themselves...just keep that in mind.






Cons (list three cons)
Example: You have some issues with advanced grammar and capitalization
You tend to get wordy at times.
I thought Twilight was slightly out of character when she went crazy
Notes Section (how you can improve your fic, at the very least an elaboration of Pros and Cons section)
Example: I think you may want to try to give more reason for Twilight's descent into stress mode. Possibly try to involve Inky Jay a little more. I like how wordy you get, but sometimes a simple sentence shall suffice in certain situations, such as the romantic scene between Inky and Rainbow Dash. As for the advanced grammar and capitalization, I would be happy to point them out in a private message and would recommend you to a proofreader for future reference.
Enjoy your review! Please help me out by looking at my story/ this story: Example. Vren55 in Canterlot

I like the story as a whole but I dont think I like the new not spike

7066791 you are not the only one... I think though you should keep going though you may be surprised what twists I have for the Keeper triology

7066810. Ok then I shale read the sequal then

7066432 oh ok it makes sense now thank you

I haven't read this yet but I gotta know first...

Is this another spike gets betrayed by the six story or spike betrays the six kind of story? Is it

9285975 Nope its a Spike finds his destiny story and there will be no betrayal between Spike and the Main 6 (I don't particularly care for betrayal fics...)

9287282
Neither do I, thank you man. I shall read the trilogy then. :twilightsmile:

I bet it'll be cool :rainbowdetermined2:

9287299 Well I hope you enjoy it!

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