Tatsurou
Joined 13th Dec, 2012 ·
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Each of these chapters would mean less time to writing your other works. So please, discontinue.
Also, I don't think the guy "riffing" that stuff is really worth mentioning. Having fun is one thing, missing very obvious symbolism in pieces he's supposed to read and riff is another, an obvious example being his riff for 120 Days of Blueblood, part 2.
I thought riffverse was banned from fimfic
2789691
Depends on how it's written, really. I could put my name into a story, and it wouldn't be meta since it doesn't refer to me personally.
2789529
Jam as much symbolism as you want into that story, it's still a pretty brutal story with a lot of face value stuff.
2789529
"I don't like the fact that you are wasting your time writing stuff you want to write when you could be writing things i want you to write, so stop writing this stuff and start writing the other stuff I like more than this stuff."
Arrogant much?
What 2789702 said.
2789713 All of my this. You seem to be suffering from a case of Internet Highbrow Disorder. You act as if your opinions and words carry a lot more weight than they actually do.
Nobody's going to discontinue a story simply because you said so, especially with that attitude. You're free to have your opinions, but nobody is entitled to give half a rat's ass about them.
2789529
Regarding your first statement.
The time it takes me to write a chapter of any of my stories - from the moment I have the energy and inspiration to write to posting the completed work - is less than a single day. Within the day I begin writing, it's posted. So this isn't taking time from anything I'm writing, as the reason I'm writing these stories is I have inspiration for them and not my others.
As for your comment regarding Twow443, I happen to enjoy his work, and if I want to write something specifically for him but share it with others, that's my prerogative. You, of course, are entitled to your own opinions in that regard. Besides, riffing has nothing whatsoever to do with symbolism. It is first gut reaction to a story as you read it. If your first gut reaction happens to involve the symbolism, that's one thing. But it's not supposed to be thought provoking.
2789691
I think the reason this works is because I treat the riffingverse as an AU of Equestria, rather than an extension of fimfic. The characters in the riffingverse that represent users are just that - character representations, little more than Self insert OCs. After all, the Twow of the riffingverse is not the twow writing the stories on fimfic, and more than the Tatsurou who will be riffing come Saturday will be the Tatsurou who wrote this.
2789940
Exactly.
2789955
Speaking of that, we still on for my lesson on Saturday?
Also, what did you think of the story itself? So far, the comments have been a debate about whether or not this story should have been written and whether or not it should have passed moderation.
2789990
I couldn't care either way on that argument, haven't checked out the story yet.
I'll probably read it sometime soon, though.
2790034
Please do. I'd like to get some actual story related feedback.
Right then, reviews... reviews, reviews, reviews.
White space? Thought they happened in a lab. Eh, fair enough.
First line is quite telly, though. Let's try this from another approach:
Now, y'see how it delves into his thoughts? Instead of telling the reader about what he's thinking, show them what he's thinking!
I dunno if that word's supposed to be there. Starts with an 'a'.
'Exodus' or 'release' would work here, not 'escape'.
Color me intrigued now.
Another wary word in there, 'escape'.
This is just the first paragraph, and I can already see you have issues with show vs. tell. What you should be doing is describing things a bit more vividly, and delving into Blueblood's brain. You're showing us what you think of the scene, not what Blueblood thinks of the scene. Be the evil prince for a bit and describe the world through his eyes.
You'll end up with a more catching first paragraph.
Now, for the other stuff, suppose I'll give 'er a read...
2790074
Well thanks for the in depth review so far. I certainly can improve this quite a bit, can't I?
2790084
Ohhh, you could EASILY triple the word count here.
2790100
Yeah...it's hard for me to get into a character's head if I don't know them that well...and I couldn't really stomach much of 120 Days.
2789529 Now that just hurt my feelings.
2790394
So, is this one somehow going to find its way into "Saving Twow," or will it be riffed separately?
2789940 Oh, okay.