Letters from an Irritated Princess

by Tired Old Man

Magic Items Tend to be Monstrous. Mirrors are Beastly, for Example

Dear Princess Celestia,

My purse just got hit with a magic orb thingy. Now it's sentient and asking me in a wheezing low voice to wish for things to make my life happier, especially if it involves trapping my enemies within its twisting, hoarding maze-like contents of makeup and vanity products complemented with a seemingly infinite number of pockets.

Should I use this for detention?

~~~

Dear Principal Celestia,

Detention? For you, that is perfect. Heck, I could probably use one of those purse prisons (sounds catchy, am I right?) just to cut down on occupied space in so many ways for all the irredeemable villains in my world.

I don’t know if a purse will fit all of mine, though. Do you know if those things come in a bigger size?

~~~

Dear Princess Celestia,

That’s a silly question.

I have all the tote bags.

Comments

[ShadowLDrago]

Mirror Magic was fun.

[Tired Old Man]

So, I've seen the latest episode, and there's only one thing I have to say:

Anyone that looks at a nonfiction journal and claims it's a "story" deserves to have a piano dropped on their head.

[Osiris Grandeur]

8361863
I absolutely love what you said!
The best part is when the find the parts they don't like in Non-Fiction, and say, oh, this didn't happen, and this is not how the author meant. All I can do then is scream, "THIS IS NOT FICTION!!! THIS IS REALITY, NUMBSKULL!!! ALL THIS HAPPENED!!!"
I mean, come on man. When something is clearly Fact and not Fiction, you'd think there'd be more people who could accept it for what it is, not cherry-pick their favorites.

Also, parts of that episode felt like they were poking fun at our community. Tell me I'm not the only one who felt that.

[Veryveryfluttershy]

8361863 Everyone had the idiot ball this episode.

[Veryveryfluttershy]

8361943 They clearly were. In fact, I'm pretty sure the sole purpose of the episode was to get us to calm the fuck down.

Also, I didn't even consider that part: they're cherry-picking autobiographies.

Idiot ball. Definitely. No question, no doubt.

[KnightMysterio]

8361863
We here at Flim & Flam's Discount Piano Services are proud to provide all your piano dropping needs! Free _{barring insurance fees}crane rental to get good height for dropping pianos on imbeciles! _{Flim & Flam reserve the right to claim the whole thing was your idea and deny the existence of our company in the event of lawsuits.}

[Alex Warlorn]

8362104
Okay, this'll be what I say last too.
It's how I move on since there is no past for me. And nothing I write is meant as a person attack, and I apologize when it does, I'm simply blunt and unaware when I am. I just don't like my interpretation being treated as nonsense.

Spoilers for newest episode.

[KnightMysterio]

8362083
Not in stock, but we do have access to a spell that will greatly enlarge a piano to the desired size! _{Flim&Flam claim no responsibility in the event of total genocide/total global apocalypse.}

[blazikenking]

These letter seems to have been a bit purse-onal.

[Jphyper]

Celestia needs to be on the lookout for big blue boxes.

[Coin Drop]

8361863
A bit off topic, but I can't help but think about how Daring Do had to suffer this stupidity at some point.

[FanOfMostEverything]

The next logical step is to get your prison-bag lost in transit during air travel, thus ensuring that those sealed within are never seen again.

[AyanamiRei]

8361953
I mean maybe they looked at it closer to a memoir where it's more of a fusion between the two or something?

Still, it was a rather hilariously terrible episode. Certainly one that had a lot of good natured poking at the fandom. I think the best part was when that lady was talking about how Twilight was better BEFORE she became an Alicorn Princess

[CaxmtheNobody]

8365877
Episode? What episode?