Dear Rainbow Dash,
I thought this week couldn't get worse. I mean, I put up with the fact that Luna and I had lost our substitute pillows to her pets' dragonfire. Shortly after that discovery, half of the nobles in court that day are sitting in the burn ward after unceremoniously deciding to stage the single worst castle raid in the history of castle raiding. With dragons roaming about the halls. The outcome was pretty much mandatory.
Other than the pillows, the castle was perfectly fine. No burn marks anywhere except for a few spots in the garden! Our fireproofing did the trick, so outside of paying for a few noble medical bills with their own tax money, issuing a VERY stern warning to not go snooping around my castle ever again without my express permission, and going around the castle replacing what must have been over a hundred potted plants and vases, the castle still stood tall. Nothing as permanently damaging as a destroyed tower or anything.
I believed that would be the end of the damages this week... until Cloudsdale piped up with a special report on you, Rainbow Dash. Specifically, somepony saw you in their factory wrecking their machinery, and eventually causing a meltdown that had not only brought winter to Ponyville too quickly for reasonable preparations, but singlehoofedly crippled the ONE town capable of generating winter for other towns not in the proper climate regions!
Winter is now delayed for every other town they haven't visited for a few months, at minimum. That is the extent of the damage you've caused, Rainbow Dash. And, simply put, there aren't nearly enough funds in the Harmony Fund to cover even a fifth of the costs at present time--it barely covers a fifth of the cost of rebuilding a new factory from scratch.
This has left me with little options--putting you through the court systems on crimes of extreme weather tampering and destruction of city property, is one method that would most certainly see you visit my cells in record time. While the city of Cloudsdale would see their justice done, you and I both know that doesn't suit either of us. I don't want to see you in court, and you don't want to sit there in a fancy suit with your wings tucked in like a restrained pigeon.
However, I have a far better option, one that will directly fix the damage you caused, in addition to providing a safety net in case something like this ever happens again. Simply put, Rainbow Dash, you will assist in the relief efforts for damage the factory explosion on Cloudsdale (lucky for you that Ponyville only got snow, and not hail, or you'd be helping there too). In addition, I've crammed a proposal down the Cloudsdale Council's throats in the creation of a second Rainbow Factory, separate from the town itself. Once they realize exactly how necessary that is--and how dumb I told them it was for them to just keep one and pray it doesn't fail--they'll approve it, and you will further repent for your misdeeds by aiding in the construction of this new factory.
This will, quite obviously, take place over a period of time far longer than the winter season, and you'll be spending a great deal of time away from Ponyville whilst on the job. However, I think this a far better solution than seeing you cry yourself into a puddle in my dungeon. Plus, you'll get to be with your pet turtle on weekends! You know, as opposed to meeting them through reinforced mythril bars once a month for visiting hours.
I think the choice is obvious here, but it's yours to make in the end.
Best regards,
Princess Celestia
Hello, Luna. What's wrong?
...what do you mean the sugar is all gone? You're telling me you DIDN'T fireproof that?!
Well, you thought wrong! Come on, let's get going to the store before it closes! I need a cake tonight, and I'll be sent to Tartarus before letting a sugar shortage curb my craving! You keep watch over your sugar-melters while I fly away from this balcon-YYYYYYYYYY!
...yes, I'm fine. These bushes are quite cozy. Also, whoever put that carpet over the hole in my balcony is going to get a VERY important lesson on why covering up problems just makes them worse when they're discovered!
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Rainbow Dash is basically a terrorist.
A very important lesson indeed. Celestia in this 'verse does not seem big on letting shenanigans go unanswered.
6078323 Well, a sabatour, anyways. Being a terrorist implies you're trying to cause fear. As for singling out RD, a lot of the ponies have done something Very Bad.
while I fly away from this balcon-YYYYYYYYYY! Oh I am a bad dragon. I can just see this. White feathers everywhere, with Celestia plot over tea kettle in the bushes with little pegasi flying around her head, mostly gray with blond mane and tail with a few blue ones.
6078323 the term terrorist carries a LOT of connotations, including intent to inspire terror, that simply do not apply to Rainbow Dash. She did something incredibly stupid, to be sure, but...honestly, when all it takes is one lighting jar getting knocked over to set the whole room off, and you take into account all the other insanity that ponies survive (Getting struck by lightning, falling anvils, fireworks that melt all the nails in a house while blowing it up [comics], getting punted through walls), it's clear that nopony's life was in serious danger...just a bunch of equipment of unknown value. (Tank's life, maybe, but he's not a pony.)
No, the term terrorist is definitely not the correct term to use.
Well, at least Rainbow isn't going to prison. I really don't think she'd like it there.
I loved this chapter.
Interesting that ponies have access to mythril...
And on a different note, why are the bits at the end the most priceless?
6078788
I love making the end bits. Feels like a sweet sundae at the end of a good dinner.
"Or the dessert cake after eating cake for dinner!"
...or that, I guess.
Oh no, it's almost caught up to the show!
I can't wait to see the fallout from this latest development.
...I'll show myself out.
My headcanon is that Dash didn't get caught. That's why she didn't face consequences for her actions-- nobody knew it was her. You'd think such a critical component of the nations infrastructure and ecosystem would have better security (or any security, for that matter).
I was basically going "WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?!" when Rainbow Dash was sabotoging the Weather Factory.
In Rainbow's defense.....
...yeah, I got nothing.
6078893 There was obviously security, or she wouldn't have had to do all the sneaking and vent-climbing. She evaded it, because she's awesome.
6078641
Not everypony! Only of those too stupid to understand what a problem is.
CMC and castles, dragons and bears OH MY!pre14.deviantart.net/8a3c/th/pre/i/2014/343/c/e/cutie_mark_crusaders_demolition_team_by_hillbe-d89add8.jpg
6079050
Hey! I got a defence! And it's the best defence! I'm awesome! What more could you need?
Sometimes Rainbow, you amaze me.
Of course I do! Because I'm awesome!
...
6079851
Your Highness, I argue that my client simply isn't smart enough to wreck such a high tech complex as the weather factory.
Hey!
Case dismissed!
.... I object.
6080005
Objection! No system is idiot proof, therefore Rainbow Dash could easily break your machine!
I thought we were friends!
They're paying me in gems. Sorry Rainbow.
You are so grounded when we get home!
... I'm still awesome though, right? That's gotta count for something!
6080034 Sigh... Spike, you aren't doing it Wright! Phoenix, show the kid how it's done!
-Got it! Watch and learn! OBJECTION!-
See? That is how you object!
6080270
6080034
6080005
vignette1.wikia.nocookie.net/aceattorney/images/0/02/AA5_Holdit.png/revision/latest?cb=20140217023920
Courtroom shenanigans? In MY comment logs?! Order! I demand ord--
Case readmitted! I want to see how this plays out!
Wha-- but Tia, this ain't normal court procedu--
vignette1.wikia.nocookie.net/aceattorney/images/a/af/ZamvJ.png/revision/latest/scale-to-width/185?cb=20140726143516
My court, my rules.
...Fine! The trial may proceed.
6078323 Terrorism arguably requires the intent to cause terror. Rainbow was, at worst, an industrial saboteur.
Well, at least some good came of it. The weather industry will certainly learn not to have a single point of failure. Celestia will make sure of that.
Also, seems like the Crusaders did relatively well in their dragonsitting. Relatively.
Honesty, like Read and Week, this was one episode that would have worked with one of the CMC...
Why the writers just keep making RD dumber and dumber?
6055797 Goshdangit. Now I've got the Oompa Loompa song stuck in my head. FRIIIIICK
See Rainbow, this is why causing Nuclear Winter is a bad idea.
6080511
This reminds me of the courts on Kardassia.
Dear Princess Celestia,
(As I am a young Pegasus, I don't know yet how rainbows are made. Do you know how?
And please excuse my frankness, your Highness.)
There has been a rumor going around Cloudsdale that the Rainbow Factory... Uses ponies to make rainbows. Eurgh. Could you go there to make sure there are no ponies whatsoever being maimed/killed to make ANY weather product!
I would have tried to see what's going on there myself, but I have no protection spells, and I fear that if the rumors are true, I would be ground into rainbow paste.
And if you do go inspect the Rainbow Factory, please do so with utmost caution. Put protection spells upon yourself! I do not wish to think about what the employees at the Rainbow Factory would do to you... Actually, you would make the most spectacular rainbow! Oh dear. Do not take offense to that...
If you do inspect the Factory, after you do so, it'd be nice if you could respond to me, if you live. I do hope those horrible tales aren't true!
Your faithful subject,
Cloudcroft
------------------------------------------------------
I just made up Cloudcroft, sorry.
6086284
That letter is pretty close to mine.
In the rainbow factory
See now, this is what I thought should have happened. After literally wrecking the weather factory and ruining the change of seasons, Rainbow Dash should have had severe comeuppance.
I thought that RD basically just didn't get caught. Obviously her friends knew what she had done but didn't rat her out. Otherwise she would have been in deep trouble. Blowing up a critical government facility would certainly have consequences.
Mythril? In Equestria? Did Gandalf pay a visit?
few options
And then she misses that the nobles actually landed a trap on her.
6078592
Yeah. They'd change her mane and tail to black and white stripes instead of colored!
Cry yourself into a puddle in my dungeon. That might be the cruelest thing I've seen Celestia say thus far, but it's also hilarious.
7454876
*Gandalf voice* A wizard is never late, nor is he early, he arrives precisely when he means to.