Scootaloo Breaks Her Scooter
Scootaloo rode through town on her scooter. She wore a big smile as she rode past the many cottages and shops in Ponyville. She decided that this would be the day she would try out her new trick. She had spent many days practicing and she now believed she was ready to try it.
Scootaloo buzzed faster her wings and she began to pick up speed. She turned at Stirrup Street and saw the ramp she had set up earlier. It wasn’t much, just a couple of wood planks stacked on some rocks, but it was going to be necessary. Scootaloo turned towards the ramp and beat her wings faster that she had ever done before. She made it to the ramp and then shot skyward.
In midair, time seemed to slow down. Scootaloo felt that she had plenty of time to do the triple-backflip she was going to do. She pressed he back hoof down on the back of her scooter, she successfully made the first flip, but when she tried to push down again for the second, she tripped. Scootaloo lost her balance and went tumbling through the air. She fell on her scooter when she hit the ground.
Scootaloo lay on the ground and looked up at the sky, she mustered all the strength she could to stand up. She checked herself to see if anything was broken, luckily, nothing was, just a few scratches. She was a little upset that her trick didn’t go as planned, but next time, she would know to make sure to keep her balance. She then looked around to find her scooter. She froze when she say it. It was cracked down the middle. She had broken it upon landing. Scootaloo didn’t know what to think, she had just broken her favorite toy. She couldn’t fly yet so it was the only way she felt alive. Now, her small mistake and broken it. She started to cry. Not the kind of tears a foal cries to himself or herself feel better, but the kind of tears a foal cries when he or she knows that whatever tragedy has just occurred can not be undone.
Rainbow Dash was flying through the air. It was a nice sunny day, the perfect time to stretch your wings to perform some wicked aerial stunts. She was about to do a midair triple-backflip, when she heard crying. She flew towards the direction of the sobs, she flew over stirrup street and saw some sort of crude ramp. And a couple of yards away from it, Scootaloo. She looked badly hurt, she had scratches on her knees and back, and quite a few bruises, but that wasn’t why she was crying, she barely even noticed her injuries as she cried over what looked like her scooter, but it was broken down the middle.
“Are you okay, Squirt?” Said Rainbow as she flew down to the crying filly.
“Oh... hi Rainbow Dash,” Scootaloo tried to hold her tears in so her idol didn’t have to see her like this, “I’m fine... it’s just that I... I broke... I broke my scooter! I.. tried to do a new trick! Now... I’ll... never be able to ride it again.”
“Oh Scootaloo, it isn’t all that bad right. At least you weren’t hurt too badly. And your scooter can be fixed,” Rainbow put her wing around her little orange friend.
Scootaloo didn’t care anymore, she just full-out cried. When Rainbow Dash showed up, it had calmed her down a bit, but that made her aware of all the bruises and scrapes she was feeling.
Scootaloo put her hooves around Rainbow and continued to cry. Rainbow returned the hug.
“It’s okay Scoots,” she was trying to comfort the filly to the best of her ability.
She tried to think about what to say next, and then she decided that the best thing to do was treat Scootaloo’s injuries. She reached behind a nearby bush and grabbed some bandages.
“How... how did... how did you do that?” Scootaloo looked surprised behind all her tears.
“I learned it from Pinkie,” Rainbow wrapped the bandages around Scootaloo’s back and legs, “she has bandages stashed all over Ponyville in case of bandage emergency.”
Scootaloo smiled a little, but then frowned again
“It’s not fair,” said Scootaloo as she looked towards the ground, “no matter how hard I try, I can never do any of the good tricks that I really want to do. I’m so worthless.”
“No, kid, you’re not worthless,” Rainbow Dash noticed that she was going to have to comfort the sad filly some more, “and, just between the two of us, I had the same exact problems when I learned to fly.”
“Really?” It had never occurred to Scootaloo that her idol had ever had trouble flying.
“Yes, really, when I came to summer flight camp, most of the foals could already do some pretty advanced tricks, but I couldn’t. During my first few days, I repeatedly tried and failed at doing dives and back-flips and, more often than not, hurt myself. That’s why they gave me the nickname Rainbow Crash.”
“But if you were so untrained, how do you now do those tricks so easily?” Asked Scootaloo.
“That’s the moral of this story, Squirt,” said Rainbow Dash, “I never gave up, I pushed myself to always do my best. To always follow my dreams. You’re not useless just because of one little scooter accident. The best thing you can do is learn from your mistake and strive to do better next time.”
“But... I broke... I broke my...” Scootaloo pointed towards the two scooter halves. Rainbow looked towards it and frowned, and she once again decided what the best thing to do was.
“Come to my house,” said Dash, “we need to fix your Scooter.”
Scootaloo looked up at her and asked, “would you seriously do that?”
“Of course I would,” she put Scootaloo on her back and hoofed her the broken scooter, “now hold on tight,” Rainbow Dash took to the sky and quickly flew towards her house.
“You’re the best, Rainbow Dash,” said Scootaloo.
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my reaction to the scooter breacking:
and by the end... happy pinkies for all!
Hm... This is one of the few stories I've had to give a bad review for... There are quite a few typos, and it's very rushed. Too short. I can summarize it in two sentences.
Scootaloo breaks scooter, and Rainbow comforts her. Rainbow confesses her former lack of skill, and then they start to fly to Rainbow's house.
Really, I'm not sure if this will go a long way... Then again, it's a simple one shot, attempting to touch the hearts of readers. Please don't be upset; people get bad reviews all the time.
2209273 Quite alright
I didn't mean for this to get featured or anything. I just got diabeetus from the cover art and decided to right a fic
Scootalove FTW!
This feels like it could a short or even an actual episode if it were fleshed out. Heck this could be the set up for a flashback episode where Rainbow Dash recounts her early days at flight school.
This is the kind of writing that I'm happy to see from new authors. It's short, but it does everything that a good story should: it introduces a problem and resolves it. It's not a cliché, it's not a trollfic, it's not clop, it's not riddled with errors, and it doesn't try to be dark and edgy. It's just canon ponies acting in character. I've read so many worse stories by new authors that this one stands out just by not falling into any of the usual traps. Bravo
2209361
What Amacita said. Nice job.
Very cute
out of five
I give you five
D'awwwww.
2209290 Thank you for your understanding. Heh, I couldn't tell you how many stories I was writing that I decided that I hated, and deleted all of it. Two of them were clop. One was already published. I can only hope nobody remembers them
2212011 I know that feel bro.
Now that I think about it a bit more, I realize that the story logic could use a bit more work.
Rainbow Dash can't repair the scooter with anything she is likely to have at her house. Applebloom would have the tools and skills needed to fix it; Twilight could find a repair spell; Rainbow Dash, on the other hand, is unlikely to be able to help, even though it's clear she wants to.
Also, people don't plan and study a difficult trick for days before attempting it. They decompose it into smaller skills and master those, building up to the big and difficult trick that they want to learn.
Still, this is a decent story. Keep up the good work, and think out your ideas a bit more next time.
2212258
#1: I removed the "study" part.
#2: I'm assuming that Rainbow Dash has wood glue, because most people do
2212258
useful advise but a little bit of a killjoy there.
well, i was expecting a better picture there. maybe a wheel off, and the thing totally destroyed.
hell, i shouldn't be braggin, i can't draw very well either.
2955481 I didn't draw the picture. It just inspired me.
So...does she have a family in this story, or is it a orphaned Scootaloo story? Because if she has a family in this story, than I don't get why she was so devastated by her scooter breaking, since she would be able to ask her parents for money to repair it. I mean, if her parents told her no for any other than that they got her a better scooter, I could see why she'd be devastated.