• Published 27th Apr 2023
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Trash of the Royal Castle - Netap



Human isekai'd into Equestria, regular stuff, right? Wrong! He knows nothing of the show and he took over the body of Prince Blueblood. Shenanigans ensue.

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Chapter 93: The One About Side Characters

"You know, I never thought I'd miss being on a boat, but here we are. Who would have guessed?"

Trixie Lulamoon, The Great and Powerful employee of the Blueblood Foundation, groaned tiredly as she rested her head on the railing of the huge metal behemoth that her boss called a ship.

This thing could fit her caravan fifty times over!

"I mean, We first came here because we needed money or a job or something, but now that we actually have it, this just feels right, you know?" Trixie rolled her eyes as her friend kept talking.

"Zephyr, If you say the words 'You Know' one more time today, I'll be throwing you overboard," Trixie told her friend, the tall Pegasus simply laughing at her threat with a shake of his head, treating it as a joke.

"Don't threaten me with a good time," Zephyr Breeze, assistant engineer for the BBF's first active ship, His Royal Highness's Andromeda, or the HRH Andromeda for short, winked at Trixie before giving her a weak push with his wings.

"Ugh, Don't you have work to do?" Trixie turned to look at him, a weak scowl on her face as she watched the other workers behind him work on making sure the containers were held down to the deck.

"Time Turner can call for me if there's a problem, or more accurately Torque will, She's all dour and such, really snappy, no jokes with her," Zephyr Breeze let out a breath before he shook his head and gave Trixie another push, "Let's go introduce you to her, You girls need to stick together! Come on Trix!"
And before Trixie could come up with an excuse to be left to her great and powerful lonesome, Zephyr Breeze grabbed her leg and dragged her into the ship.

Ready to introduce her to one Torque Wrench.


In the City of Canterlot, A Unicorn was smiling at his daughter as she hugged his legs before work.

"Daddy! I want a Prince for my Birthday!" The young mule smiled up at her father, who chuckled at her words.

"Tabitha, You know I can't give you a prince for your birthday," The Usually serious Unicorn said gently as he hugged his young daughter, "Why not ask for a bicycle?"

"I got a Bicycle from Auntie Zapp! I don't want a new bicycle, I want to be a Princess! To be a Princess I need to have a Prince at my birthday party!" Tabitha shouted happily at her father, the source of his building Tinnitus not controlling her volume as the Paper White Unicorn that was her father rubbed her head and smiled.

"I'll see what I can do," He gave her a kiss on the forehead before waving her goodbye as he exited the house with a smile on his face, ready to go to work.

The moment he was out of sight from his house, the joyful smile on his face was instantly replaced with a resolute glare, His daughter wanted a Prince at her Birthday Party, so she would be getting a prince for her birthday.

Luckily for Chancellor Neighsay, He knew a prince who likely wouldn't mind making a surprise visit at a child's birthday party.


Spike the Dragon was having a relaxing day of cleaning the floor of the Library.

As the young Dragon climbed the ladder to place some books in their place, the door to the Golden Oaks Library burst open.

"Hey, Twilight! Did you read the new Daring Do novel?!" Rainbow Dash, The Element of Loyalty, shouted loudly, causing the young dragon to drop the books he was carrying and fall onto his tail.

"Oww..." Spike said while rubbing his tail as he stood up, "Sorry Rainbow Dash, Twilight's over at Fluttershy's to give Owlowiscious a checkup," He told her before he got back to cleaning the library.

"Then I'll just have to go there! Thanks, Spike!" Rainbow Dash said loudly before flying out of the door, a cloud of dust marking her exit.

Spike stared at the newly formed cloud of dust before sighing to himself as he went to grab the feather duster.


Deep in the jungles south of Equestria, A Filly was wrapped in ropes, hanging over a pool of Lava on top of a volcano.

Surrounding the filly were many ponies wearing tribalistic clothing and covered in tattoos, waving staves of wood and feathers.

"Oh Great Huitzilopochtli! Our great Sun of the South! We offer you this sacrifice for the Hummingbird of Fire! Let your Glory be known to-" An Old Stallion wearing extravagant golden feathered robes was interrupted by the filly opening her mouth.

"Boooring!" Cozy Glow rolled her eyes from her place tied above the mouth of the volcano, "Do you do this speech every time you want to sacrifice someone? Don't they die of boredom before they even touch the lava? Your Deity must be so disappointed in you, Did you ever think of that?"

"Ahem, Let your glory be known to-" The Old stallion tried to go back to his speech.

"No, Seriously, Did you never think that maybe instead of Pony Sacrifices, your Hummingbird guy wanted, I don't know what Hummingbirds eat, Cookies? Maybe Cakes? Something that isn't volcano-fried Pegasus?" Cozy Glow once again interrupted the tribal elder, a cheeky smirk on her face as she watched the old stallion start to fume at her interruptions.

"..." The Elder took a deep breath, "Let your glory be-"

"Come on! Get to the point already! I'm falling asleep over here!" Cozy Glow's face split with a smile as she watched the Elder fall for her jeering and angrily throw his staff into the Volcano.

"Enough! Just cut the rope and drop her! Grand Huitzilopochtli will understand!" He yelled angrily, one of his ponies taking out an obsidian blade and cutting the rope that held Cozy Glow over the volcano, dropping her into the Lava.

Or at least, she would have dropped into the lave if she hadn't squirmed out of the ropes, Now flying over the maw of the active volcano, too far for the Tribesponies to capture her.

"Hah! Told you you should have thrown me in sooner!" Cozy Glow laughed at the dumbfounded faces on the Tribesponies who stared at her flying to safety on the other side of the Volcano.

"Ahhhg! After her!" The Elder yelled as he pointed his hoof at the filly, His Tribesponies roaring and waving their staves and swords as they started running after the escaped sacrifice.

"Oh, Gotta' get out of here!" Cozy laughed as her tiny wings flapped quickly, taking her away from the Jungle Ponies, A smirk on her face as she felt the ruby circlet still hidden under the bow in her hair.

"Hohoho, Gilda is going to be so jealous! Haha!"


Raven Inkwell was having a relaxing and calm day, nothing crazy was happening in the castle that would cause the mare to lose sleep.

"Blueblood?" At least, nothing should have been causing her to lose sleep, but she could already feel the headache heading in her direction.

"Yes, Raven?" Her Boss-with-benefits smirked at her, acting as if everything was normal.

"What are you doing?" Raven pointed the clipboard she was holding at the Prince, and at the Golden Spider-looking creature that he held by the tail, slinging back and forth as if it was a paddle ball toy.

"I'm playing with Comet," He told her, still slinging the creature around as if it was a ball with a string.
A Large, Golden, Spider-looking, Ball with a string.

"Oh, Carry on then," Raven wasn't ready to deal with the headache, and if the clicking sounds coming from 'Comet' were anything to go by, the creature was enjoying it.

Perhaps Raven should try some of that Birch Sap Wine that Blueblood brought Starlight when he and Princess Mi Amore Cadenza came back from wherever they went last week.

Raven could use a drink.


"HAHAHAHAHA!!! I'm a Genius! Both Brains and Beauty! HAHAHA!!! With this plan, All Equestria will be mine!" Far to the south, beyond the borders of Equestria, inside an old castle of black stone and Gothic architecture, A Queen Laughed to herself.

"And then, PRINCE BLUEBLOOD WILL BE MINE!!! HAHAHA!!!! We'll go on lovely walks on the beach, snuggle on the couch, kill Celestia, call each other by cute pet names, have a honeymoon in Prance, Brutalize Celestia, drink milkshakes with two straws in the same cup, have a romantic waltz under the night sky, Murder Celestia, oh it's going to be perfect!"

Chrysalis already has a plan.


Deep in the Magical Prison of Tartarus, A Centaur smiled in his cage.

The Cogs of Fate have once again turned, His Destiny was approaching quickly.

"Just over a year away," Lord Tirek whispered as he bit his finger, drawing blood.

"And then, Oh Aspect of War, False Prince, Pony of Light, Child of Gold, Prince of Stars, You shall play your role in the grand orchestra of Fate," His finger deftly moved on the ceiling of his cell, drawing symbols that have been etched into his mind, like an artist, his finger moved smoothly and without falter.

"But first we must speak, There is so much you have yet been told," The Red Centaur cackled weakly to himself as he looked at the arcane sigil he painted on the ceiling of his cage using his own blood.

He took a deep breath before his right arm moved like a bullet, and his fist banged on the sigil he drew.
Red, Black, and Yellow magic exploded out of the sigil, the cage of reinforced steel blowing open as he the weakened Centaur lord stepped out of his cell.

He could already hear the Dog bark in the distance, Running to call for a member of the Crown to come fix the problem.

The Cogs of Fate have started turning, Now he'll wait for Destiny to arrive.

"Human in the skin of a Pony, What a fascinating Destiny awaits you,"

Author's Note:

This Chapter was quick, short, kind of cute, and also setting up for the next Arc.

With the HRH Andromeda running, that means construction of the Yak-Pony railroad is only weeks away from starting. Good for Rutherford. He's cool.

I like him :pinkiesmile:

Cozy Glow got caught up in a Daring Do Adventure, featuring an Indiana Jones-style Aztec sacrifice.
"What would Nathan Drake do?" Gilda, Probably.

This chapter takes place during the episode "Putting Your Hoof Down", which means that the Next chapter is the start of the all-important "It's About Time" Arc.

Hope you'll look forward to it :)

Also, Chancellor Neighsay is a father, good for him :pinkiesmile:

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