Feathering the Nest

EA Snugly Draconequus, His Lovely Wife and Babies.
MLP: FiM
Romance
Slice of Life
Fluttershy and Discord enjoy some quiet, affectionate time with the family.
Fluttershy
OC
Discord
My Little Pastafarian · 1.7k words · 12 2 · 792 views

Fluttershy and Discord are married, and are happily raising their baby. This week, they do all kinds of things, both fun and necessary around the house. Theirs is a home full of love and laughter, with cozy moments and affection, play and satisfying work.

Chapters (1)

Comments ( 18 )

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GeekCat

GeekCat #1 · Nov 22nd, 2021 · 4 · ·

I'm sorry to hear about the loss of your parents. I think this was a beautiful story to dedicate to them, made even more beautiful knowing these moments come from your childhood memories. I think you managed to convey the warm, comforting feeling of home and family perfectly.

Levity is a very pretty name, and I love the design of her that you described here. It's wonderful seeing Discord and Fluttershy act as parents, and they both felt perfectly in character—they both love their daughter and each other very much, even if Discord sometimes focuses more on chaos and fun and Fluttershy on home and help. But they both care for each other and work well together.

As for Fluttershy's behavior...based on the title, I had my suspicions by the second day. I wasn't sure whether her nesting was due to the current child or a future one she was pregnant with, but it was brilliantly foreshadowed without being too obvious.

Overall, this story was a delight to read, and made me feel warm and fuzzy all the way through.

My Little Pastafarian

My Little Pastafarian #2 · Nov 22nd, 2021 · 2 · ·

11058632
Thank you for your condolences. And I'm so glad you liked the story! As the master of Fluttercord fluff, your approval means a lot

LightningChaser04

LightningChaser04 #3 · Nov 22nd, 2021 · 2 · ·

*picks up phone and calls up Pinkie Pie. “Um, hello. Yes, this is Lightning here.. Yeah, I need your help with a baby shower Pinkie. NO! Not mine! No way! Fluttershy’s! Yeah! Great news right! TTYL!”

And, this story is awesome btw! Hope to see a sequel, or more chapters! <3

My Little Pastafarian

My Little Pastafarian #4 · Nov 22nd, 2021 · 1 · ·

11058639
I'm so happy you enjoyed it!

LightningChaser04

LightningChaser04 #5 · Nov 22nd, 2021 · 1 · ·

11058642
No problem! And I’m very sorry to hear about the loss of your parents. I hope to see Levity as a 12 year old or something with an annoying younger brother/ sister too. That would be funny.

Featherclaw

Featherclaw #6 · Dec 10th, 2021 · 1 · ·

Awww this was so warm and fluffy and cozy!
It’s so wonderfully cottagecore but also chaotic that I honestly didn’t realize what was happening until Discord revealed it lol
Also im sorry about your parents, but hopefully writing this story is a little therapeutic in a sense!
It can really strengthen certain memories I bet all while making it really really lovely to read.
Super good story and I love everyone’s antics!

My Little Pastafarian

My Little Pastafarian #7 · Dec 11th, 2021 · · ·

11079403
Thank you very much! Glad you enjoyed the story.

Flora Blossom

Flora Blossom #8 · Jan 23rd, 2022 · · ·

My Little review & Feedback I did your review.

Flora Blossom

Flora Blossom #9 · Jan 23rd, 2022 · · ·

which ended in a long turqoise snaketail. She had her father's eagle arm, but her right paw was that of a panther.

turquoise

She was undeniably the most beautiful baby girl that ever existed, and nopony could tell him otherwise.

Nopony is a modify english. Unless there is such a thing and it is 100% certified.

She sweeped and washed the floors, dusted and wiped, did the laundry and the dishes.

Sweeped should be change to swept

“Oh sweetie, that does sound like fun, but I just really feel like cleaning today!” Fluttershy told him with a slighty apologetic tone.

slightly

“Dis... Wait... AH!” Fluttershy gasped as he gave her sensitive ear a tender lovebite.

Lovebite isn't one word its two; love bite

The energetic draconequus cub had spent all morning bouncing all over and getting piggyback rides from her parents, so she konked out pretty much the moment she was laid down.)

Knocked

(there is more)

if you use the same two words twice. you need a ,

(and many many nuzzles and petting and kissing shared by all,)

"And if you really really are in the mood for doing all this housemake-y stuff then that..."

I some how noticed that the second really is slanted? Why did you do that?

My Little Pastafarian

My Little Pastafarian #10 · Jan 23rd, 2022 · 2 · ·

which ended in a long turqoise snaketail. She had her father's eagle arm, but her right paw was that of a panther.
turquoise
Okay, I'll give you that. I missed a single vowel.
She was undeniably the most beautiful baby girl that ever existed, and nopony could tell him otherwise.
Nopony is a modify english. Unless there is such a thing and it is 100% certified.
Have... have you seen My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic? In the entire show, they substitute the "body" in "somebody," "nobody," "anybody," with "pony:" "somepony,"nopony," "anypony." This is part of the language of the show, and I don't think it's wrong to follow canon in a fanfic.
Also, "a modify english" is not a thing. Modified english, maybe.
She sweeped and washed the floors, dusted and wiped, did the laundry and the dishes.
Sweeped should be change to swept
Right. My bad.
“Oh sweetie, that does sound like fun, but I just really feel like cleaning today!” Fluttershy told him with a slighty apologetic tone.
slightly
Again, my bad.
“Dis... Wait... AH!” Fluttershy gasped as he gave her sensitive ear a tender lovebite.
Lovebite isn't one word its two; love bite
https://www.dictionary.com/browse/lovebite
The energetic draconequus cub had spent all morning bouncing all over and getting piggyback rides from her parents, so she konked out pretty much the moment she was laid down.)
Knocked
No, not knocked. Konked: https://idioms.thefreedictionary.com/konk+out
(there is more)
if you use the same two words twice. you need a ,
Right.
(and many many nuzzles and petting and kissing shared by all,)
"And if you really really are in the mood for doing all this housemake-y stuff then that..."
I some how noticed that the second really is slanted? Why did you do that?

It is a common practice to use italics when wanting to convey the fact that a person adds some emphasis on a word. Like in this clip:

You could write it "But I'm really really really... (and to emphasize in text form that she yells at the end, using all caps:) "...SORRY!"

Not all writers do this, but I really really don't think it's such a grave sin.

So to sum it up, two typos, one use of an obsolete writing of a word instead of using the modern form "swept," one disagreement on how a word is spelled although both are valid, one instance of you not knowing a phrase and deducing I wrote it wrong, two missed commas, and you not being familiar with the use of italics. Oh, and you not apparently being familiar with the canon vernacular of the show.

And to you this translates to "However, the grammar was very poorly written," and "gibberish." (and the only instance of gibberish you seem to point out is the single use of "nopony," and you made it sound you have to muddle through paragraphs of complete nonsense.) Even if you were 100% right about every one of your criticisms, that's a bit harsh, no? That still sums up to about five, maybe 7-8 words in 3000+.

11129692

Flora Blossom

Flora Blossom #11 · Jan 23rd, 2022 · · ·

11129719
hmmm... I see. Lovebite can be together but it's a typo. and konked is also a typo... I double checked too... it has a red underline as well. Even if I type it in FIM Fiction... ah idioms... I don't like to use them... since it's redline and every program I use tells me it clearly fails. I use 3. google docs, word, and virtual writing tutor as well. I thought Konked was spelled with a C. though..???

My Little Pastafarian

My Little Pastafarian #12 · Jan 23rd, 2022 · · ·

11129974
The programs are not foolproof. That is why it's advisable to use dictionaries to double-check and use the spelling that works for you. And as you see via the link I gave you, it can be spelled "konked." I chose this spelling because it looks and sounds funnier, and I wanted the moment to have a light-hearted tone.

Flora Blossom