• Member Since 1st Aug, 2019
  • offline last seen Yesterday

Revel Montaro


T

This story is a sequel to Incarnate


Twilight Sparkle is now the sole ruler of the throne of Equestria. With the exchange of power though also comes a change of the guard and those that loyally served the Solar and Lunar princesses. While much of the palace staff chose to stay on to assist the new ruler some positions required change following retirements and resignations. One such opening was the Captain of the Royal Guard. There were many qualified candidates available, but with so much uncertainty only one Twilight truly trusted above all others to get the job done better than the rest. Tempest Shadow.

After some talking and convincing, Tempest accepts the position, but that does not mean the guard and the rest of Canterlot is ready to accept her.

Takes place timeline wise following Season 9 and includes my own tweaks and changes that occurred in Incarnate months earlier.

Chapters (17)
Comments ( 42 )

This is going to be great. Pony versions of Sour and sugarcoat too

Yes! The Tempest Fic has arrived!

On another note

“As you can imagine many ponies loved Celestia and in Canterlot they loved how little she directly interfered in the status quo. My ascension to the throne has… disrupted that even more than the last battle or the fact that Celestia has a daughter.”

Subtle name drop.

Having Kibitz retire doesn't surprise me as he seems older than Raven, while Raven could stick around a while longer until her successor. Considering there's around a century between Incarnate and Gods and Monsters, I would imagine Twilight's had at least one assistant in between her and Isa.

Great start, nice to know what's been going on in Equestria while Sunset and co. are in college.

Luna uses (so) sort of magical ritual and a few potions, I think?

Im not sure if your autocorrect changed the word some to the word so

This story is great so far. Looking forward to seeing what Tempest thinks of the rest of the guard

10780492
Was supposed to say "some". Good catch, thanks.

don't mess with Captain Tempest Shadow.

... written by Google autotranslate ...

And so begins the reconstruction of an effective fighting force.

10791806
I don't get the joke, but okay if you say so.

Yay Sour Sweet. Such a cute pony

Her smile seemed forced to Tempest, just a bit too wide. Her faint yellow coat was the color of freshly churned butter and was complimented well by her bubble gum pink mane with mint color streaks that was cut smart in the front similar to Twilight’s and pinned up in a hightail in the back. The only distinguishing article of clothing she had was a expertly tied, fine looking navy blue bowtie around her neck.

Hello pony Sour Sweet. Are you as insufferable as your human counterpart?

“Sour Sweet,” Tempest shrugged, “I’ve heard worse.”

Knew it.

10803161
Insufferable in all the best ways.

ooohhh Sugarcoat is a thestral

10816116
i mean, the cover art's already a dead giveaway

10816125
Yeah, realized that after I commented lol

hmmm i wonder how Tempest will get out of this

Purity scoffed again. “That undeserving, commoner who stumbled into alicorn princesshood? And I use to think the stories of how Cadenza earned her wings were ridiculous. At least she was purportedly the descendant of a long lost noble line from the Crystal Empire. But that book worm? Not a drop of hard earned noble blood flows through her veins. Celestia must have truly gone senile in this last year to choose to retire and hoof over the throne to Sparkle alone.”

Oh I just love nobility. :facehoof: Seriously, blood is all they care about with their "holier than thou" attitude. Whatever happened to earning something through merit? I mean Sunset might've satisfied the blood thing if she wasn't illegitimate, but I would argue she earned her wings even if it was an emergency situation. Sure, one of these nobles' ancestors might have dont something to warrant their title, but like Flurry Heart, they were born into their status.

Ok, I take back what I said about Sour Sweet, I'm lovin' her right now. She might still be despicable, but at least it's to the bad guys.

I cannot say the same about Flag Staff who is just bitter he didnt get his promotion. He can just sod off since Tempest is 100x the soldier he is.

Things aee going to get intense

Hopefully Twi made an example out of Purity and having read incarnate and its sequel. We know they failed.

Hopefully Twi isn't as soft as her mentor and made sure they' all get stoned

Oh, I just love power-hungry megalomaniacs. Did I say love? I meant despise.
Twilight and Tempest are gonna find a way out of this, obviously, the question is how?
That neutral expression on Fancy Pants gives me hope. Sweet and Elite did paint him in a more positive light, Between Dark and Dawn maybe less so. I mean there's got to nobles loyal enough to the Royal Sisters to support Twilight right?

You know that there's got to be some noble in that room thinking, "hold on, why do we want to kill one of the only people who can stop Discord from turning us all into cabbages?"

10863241
Discord would probably turn them into cabbages for killing Twilight. If not, Celestia would go Daybreaker and incinerate the nobles or even Canterlot in a blind rage (if she was willing to do the same to Starswirl her mentor at just the thought to Sunset being killed) and take her throne back.
Crystal Empire would probably declare war.

Come on, Fancy Pants. Rat this bitch out!

10863456
Discord would probably not get violent unless they attacked Fluttershy. Celestia would be angry, but remember in this world she has been significantly weakened after giving some of her power to Sunset and Sombra stealing it. Now Luna on the other hand(hoof). Yeeeeah. I'll just leave that one hanging. Also, yeah Shining will be mad as well.

10863967
Fair point. I thought maybe, because Twilight's death would've weighed heavily on Fluttershy, Discord just might get involved, but like you said, if Fluttershy isn't attacked directly, it's unlikely.
And yeah I forgot for a second Celestia was weakened, and powering up might (unknowingly at this point) be detrimental to her health. Just figured Celestia would have a closer bond with Twilight than Luna, but add in her own rage to acting on her sister's behalf and well... I don't know if she'd go NMM again but it sure wouldn't be pretty.
And dont forget about Cadance, kind of a package deal with the crystal royal couple.

"Raven, you convuluted waist of circuits, I am damn sure I selected welcome to the jungle"

10889712
Raven is a trickster at silicon heart.

I knew I had a good feeling about Fancy Pants. It's shame he died though.

“HALT, TRAITORS!” Tempest turned back to the mezzanine. What she saw made her blood boil and horn burn with magical sparks. Flag Staff propped himself up on the rail pointing at the thestrals, ordering followers to battle. His dark eyes shrank to pinpricks when he spotted the mulberry unicorn down below. “Impossible.”

You and me both, sister.

“On my six, double time!” The squad of crystal ponies saluted and chased after their prince and captain.

I love how you went through that whole section without mentioning Shining Armor by name, as you can clue in it's him.

“That’s what she saAAIDDD AAAARGH!!!” Shining pulled the bolt free and then enveloped the mare in a healing aura. He was not a medical expert, but he could stop the bleeding and stabilizer her for a professional to do the rest. Sour nodded her thanks and patted Tempest's leg to indicate that she was going to be okay.

Gosh darn it, Sour Sweet, now's not the time for sex jokes...

“Are you kidding me?” exclaimed Twilight, drawing Purity’s scorn. “This… all of this fighting and, and killing and Celestia knows what else you have done… all of this because you think the princesses had to ask for permission to pass on their crowns?! When was the last time you cracked a history book?! The three tribes were on the brink of WAR! They BEGGED Celestia and Luna to lead them. While Celestia has never confirmed or denied it, from what I have gathered neither of them wanted to rule, but they had been groomed for their eventual roles ever since birth Their special talents over the celestial bodies only further proved it was their destiny. They were the first to ascend, the secrets of the universe itself hoofed to them by the very heavens of Mother Creation. And you think they needed council PERMISSION?!”

Of course, Twilight the book horse goes dictating the history books. As they say "those who don't learn from history are doomed to repeat it"

“Awww, I’m sorry, sweetie, but I totally saw that one coming and could not keep from introducing my hoof to your pretty, traitorous face.”

Oh, I like you, Sour Sweet

i always am sad at the end of such amazing story telling, due to it being the end an all

At first, Tempest found the entire thing too outrageous from the sheer amount of gold worked into the design. However, with Rarity’s assistance they had buffed down some of the patina at her request and worked in some of the natural black ferronite metal with a minimal of purple trim to stay in theme with the colors for the guard under Twilight’s banner. Rarity had also suggested some gems to give the armor some unique character since it was for the Captain of the Guard. The designer and armorer ended up double teaming Tempest to press forward their concepts. Vector had finally convinced Tempest when he explained that they could enchant the gems to help regulate her excess power leakage into a subtle magical defense matrix. Between the stored energy and the ferronite’s natural resistance to magical attacks it would take the power of an angry god to penetrate the final product. Still, on most days Tempest chose to wear her old black armor. However, today was special.

Well, hopefully Tempest isn't gonna need that kind of defence, 'cause that would be an understatement for the mare who would eventually don her old armor.

Still glad Fancy Pants made it, and even got a promotion!

Amazing story with an amazing ending!
And of course, we know little Tempest will grow up to be a fantastic captain of the guard.

10905866
Thank you for reading.
10905932
Thank you for reading and don't worry, we'll see Tempest Fury again.

The mighty and majestic Ebony has found your story both thrilling and well written and therefore we shall honor it with our thanks for the entertainment. -stomping hoofs in applause- well done, Ebony, in all his majestic glory, shall eagerly await the story of one Tempest Fury, finding her endearing and adorable, and foresee many great things ahead of her

10906671
Thank you for reading, Ebony. If you are looking for more Tempest Fury I suggest reading Gods and Monsters.

10906762
-Tapping my hoof to my chin in consideration before raising it in a dramatic pose- Very well you have convinced the Mighty and Majestic Ebony and we shall read the recommended story additionally we offer our appreciation, you may feel a sense of awe we assure this is normal just breath and bask it shall be alright, now off to read!!

Purity is lucky that Sunset is stuck beyond the dimensional wall. She’d be ash.

Hmm, who could've possibly met Sugaarcoat's no doubt monumental standards to earn her hoof in marriage?

Login or register to comment