Anon 69 News

by Amilition

‘Huh, That’s Kind Of Weird,’ Thinks Fruit Fly Diving In To Dish Of Honey Containing Corpses Of 15 Other Fruit Flies

Fruit fly takes a nice dip in a dish of honey containing 15 of his fruit fly brother's corpses.

And Anonymous is missing. Was this an accident or are there darker forces at work?

From Anon 69 Public Radio, I'm Cracker Jack and this is Anon 69 News. I think this may be my favorite job.

Observing yet disregarding the bodies of 15 of his fellow flies suspended in the tempting but viscous substance, a fruit fly reportedly found itself thinking “Huh, that’s kind of weird,” Tuesday as it plunged into a dish of honey containing the suffocated corpses.

“Granted, it’s a little disturbing, but it’s probably not anything to worry about,” said the Drosophila melanogaster, putting the somewhat unusual sight of its deceased brethren out of its mind as it drew nearer to the mesmerizing expanse of delicious, glistening honey.

“That’s certainly not something you see every day, but so what? I’m already a week old. I can’t pretend I know everything, but life’s too short to be scared of every new experience. Sure, that’s a lot of bodies, but there’s also a lot of wonderful honey. Hey, look, my mom and dad are down there!”

At press time, the sinking fruit fly’s mouth had filled up with honey as it vainly attempted to cry out a warning to approaching fruit flies.

The Fruit Fly Health and Association, FFHA, put out a statement regarding the risk of honey saying,

"Even though the honey may look delicious and sweat, but take a look around you and think. If you see honey with a fly in it, ask it the four questions. Are you having fun? I'l it good? Is it sweet? And are you alive? If it does not respond to any of these, it's likely that he's dead."

The funeral will be held on Saturday from 4:00 pm to 9:00 pm.

This has been Cracker Jack From Anon 69 News. See you till next time.

Click.

Comments

[JustSomeDyslexic]

"Even though the honey may look delicious and sweat, but take a look around you and think. If you see honey with a fly in it, ask it the four questions. Are you having fun? I'd it good? Is it sweet? And are you alive? If it does not respond to any of these, it's likely that he's dead."

Is

[Amilition]

10361067
Thank you my good sir.

[TerribleSpeller]

Chapter is about a fly getting stuck in honey.

57 People :

INTERESTING

[Sanya]

And Luna continues to deny that she has a secret body pillow of me, although I clearly found it in the back of her closet. . . if I disappear, it was not on my own accord.

And Anonymous is missing. Was this an accident or are there darker forces at work?

RIP Anon

[spikls]

"Even though the honey may look delicious and sweat, but take a look around you and think. If you see honey with a fly in it, ask it the four questions. Are you having fun? I'l it good? Is it sweet? And are you alive? If it does not respond to any of these, it's likely that he's dead."

*Sweet *Is

[spikls]

On a completely irrelevant note: I appear to have been victim of a terrible theft of dank memes :(

[DarkDMan]

10361254
Or it's this;

Massage! Now!"

Um. . . I'm in the middle of-

"Don't. Care. Me, you, your fingers, my room, now. I also bought some expensive whisky. I want to get shit faced drunk and make some horribly good decisions with you."

*Sigh*

Coming.

Either way, the next chapter is going to be funny!

Let's go!

[Amilition]

10361289
Bro, Riccardo got you.

i.ibb.co/bRwy5s9/Img-1596220777443.jpg

[Amilition]

10361330
Man, I am so happy to be able to make people smile.

[vortex123]

Huh, well I’ll give you props, I’ve never read any like this chapter before.

[starshow]

Okay. What? Umm.
It’s to late to be reading this.

[DovahkiinMaster]

Y'all, what even?

[Coretz]

10361092
Your correction needs correcting. It currently says "I'l".