Flowers Left Over From Foal's Funeral Under Tremendous Pressure To Thrive
Flowers left over from a funeral under serious pressure today.
And is Starlight Glimmer secretly spreading communist propaganda after being reformed?
From Anon 69 Public Radio, I am Anonymous, and this is Anon 69 News. I wish I can turn invisible so I don't have to deal with my social anxiety.
Speculating that even the slightest trace of withering or discoloration would devastate the family, a pot of lilies left over from 12-year-old Chex Bait's funeral confirmed Monday, that it was under tremendous pressure to thrive. For more on this, Tank joins us. Hello, Tank.
"Not my name but, hi Anonymous."
Again, not a single fiber of my body can't find any fucks to give. Now, any statements?
Sigh
“The plant came out and stated, 'Obviously, I don’t want to make this moment all about me, but I’m feeling an immense amount of pressure to not let a single petal wilt right now. And I don’t know if I’m up to the challenge,' said the flowering plant, stressing that it was sure to face an incredible amount of scrutiny based on its position amidst keepsakes and photographs.
Poor thing.
"He followed by up saying, 'They’re going to be hovering over me, tapping my pistils, looking for any little imperfection that’ll make them think of their dead kid and start breaking down again. Honestly? It sucks. I know that’s callous, but I can’t help but wish I had just grown up along a river bed, or been picked for a wedding. Goddammit, is that a brown spot on one of my leaves?! Not sure why I thought these folks could possibly keep me alive.'"
At press time, the lilies added that although the family was clearly going through a lot, the least they could do was move it's pot into direct sunlight, and water it daily if it meant that much to them."
Can't imagine what that plant is going through. Well thank you Tree, for coming on.
"At least that's close."
Well, this has been Anonymous from Anon 69 News. I'll be seeing you.
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I would like to know.
10377029
Probably.
Maybe.
Ok, it's unlikely but clearly false rumors are fun.
That’s all he’d use invisibility for? Come on! Think of all the pranks he could do, or the secrets he could discover.
Maybe we should donate some fertilizer to this poor plant...
"Today Anon was granted a ring of invisibility by B_Princess Luna. Sadly after an unconfirmed and likely unrelated ghost scare in the spa changing room, Celestia modified the enchantment so a bright emerald diamond would float over Anon's noggin every time he turned it on."
10378011
A plumbob! Does it change from green to red when he gets emotional?