Sunset Shimmer having been kicked out of her home, by her mentor, for seeking power, escapes through the mirror and finds herself in a world devastated by a substance known as tiberium.
The world has two superpowers vying for control of the world and the tiberium on it. Both groups are seeking ways for humanity to survive the dangerous crystals that grow by absorbing everything around it.
The Global Defense Initiative is a large military group that originated from the United Nations focuses mostly on the first world countries and negating or reducing the spread of tiberium.
The Brotherhood of Nod, however, is a religious quasi-state. It is dedicated to spreading tiberium so that everyone can share in its effects, and modifying humanity so that they can survive exposure to tiberium. They are devoted to the ideas of peace, unity and brotherhood. They believe that they can achieve this through the spread of tiberium and the defeat of the oppressors: GDI.
Sunset joins The Brotherhood of NOD in their quest for Peace Through Power.
The Technology of Peace. Peace Through Power. In the name of Kane. Kane Lives in Death.
A crossover with the Command and Conquer series, focusing on Tiberian Sun.
This seems a little confusing.
An interesting start. All the other C&C crossovers I’ve seen have all been FiM, but this is the first EQG one.
On a side note, I haven’t played the first two games in a very long time. I should really get around to correcting that.
9986409
Thanks.
Tiberian Sun is my favourite C&C game.
I hope I can do this crossover justice.
You sir/madam, have pleased me. FOR KANE!
9986442
now if only someone would do a civ 5 mlp crossover . id love to see how equestria does on earth I mean there is an equestria civ mod for the game after all
ooh ya sunset, of all the earths to land on this'd be the one you don't want to be on and celestia ought to chuck the portal into the sun if it had even a chance of spreading tiberium to equestria, or say someone from tiberium earth spreads it there. *cough sunset cough*
flesh eating rock crystals that are eating the planet from the inside out are not good for long term habitability, especially with the tiberium explosion that happens when it reaches critical mass
Not bad, I'm liking this.
I will be reading this soon.
Just from reading the desc, GDI isn't fighting to control the world, its trying to defend the world from Tiberium and Nod.
Also, the phrase "Kane lives in Death" is usually said after someone says "In the name of Kane"
Okay. I want to know how she ended up with nod.
9987012
I will explain with flashbacks later on.
Could use some work. Several unnecessay lines and repeats here and there. Alot of repetetive words. However, it was a good start.
9987425
Thanks. I'll work on that.
9987608
no problem, also i like that this is set during the Second Tiberian War
Very interesting, if long winded. Looking forward to more.
Keep up the good work. Kane lives in death.
9988006
Thank you.
I will try to work on it.
In the name of Kane.
9988053
It's worth noting that most of what I'm irritated at is the over descriptive descriptions of the C&C stuff. C&C is old hat to me, so it's like telling me what an apple looks like. That said, this isn't a C&C fan site, so probably many people reading this won't have a clue, so I won't complain about it.
I'm really liking this, hope to see more of Sunset's memories.
Wow, that's one hell of a backstory.
Holy mother of god this is one rough story. I think this is one of the worst examples of a story that so utterly devoid of flow that it reads like a robot wrote it.
I mean, my god that paragraph was difficult to read. You cant do sentances like that it simply isnt good its like, heres an example.
A woman walked into a room. She used her identification to log into the computer, and then plugged in a device. She then ran a program.
That is, in essence, what you said in that pargraph. Thats all the information you gave us, and I would note that entire pargaraph would have functioned better as a single sentance like. "She walked into the room, located the computer, and plugged in a handheld device before running a secret program." Every period is a breath and full pause. Remember that.
And now, with feeling.
The woman strode confidently into the room, her gaze forward and focused on a computer terminal set off to one side of the room. Seating herself before it, the woman quickly pulled out a small stick the size of a usb drive and plugged it into the larger device before accessing a secret program.
Same information, but only one of them actually sounded like something created by a human being.
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Thanks for the advice. I will try to improve upon it.
I believe it improves a little in a later chapters.
Nice.
9990588
Well I'm gonna be frank with you, I cant sit through that much robot words to get that far. Regardless, I wish you the best and will leave you with one last bit of advice I received when I was starting out.
Dont forget that the purpose of a story is to make someone feel something. Its not simply delivering information and telling a tale. If that was your goal you could tell a war story by simply saying. "There was a war, the main character fought in it, the war ended." But noone wants to read that.
Also, everytime a character does an action, like "Walks to the computer" there is a chance in there to give more info, and to make the scene feel real. Ask yourself, is she nervous, confident, does she tip toe across the room or stride powerfully, uncaring as to who may hear her?
9991267
Thank you again for the advice.
Story feels like a very generic action story, and this is speaking from the person who likes action stories.
You're not wrong, Nod is more bad than GDi but GDI has been shown to do bad things depending on who is in charge.
For example. The Ion Cannon strike on Temple Prime that caused a deadly chain reaction. And the fact Director Boyld wanted you to use a Liquid-T Bomb in the final fight against the Scrin.
sorry this is BS...Tiberium experiemnts was clear NOD territory not GDI..come up with a better excuse for Susnet to be with Nod then this crap.
9995683
Both sides did tiberium experiments.
9996050
GDI studied tiberium...this level of experitation is clear Nod not GDI.
Why Canceled? this story can still work.
10022897
If I think I can do it well later I will rewrite it better.
10023453
Okay. This does have potential
Unfortunate how this got cancelled.
10047107
I am currently trying to write a similar but better story. Starting around the same time as this one.
10047113
Awesome, I'm excited.
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Thanks