Merc's fic guide: by Bookplayer: Is there kicking and/or punching? [Yes/No] Have you considered adding kicking and/or punching? [Yes/No] Have you considered adding more kicking and/or punching?
Gilda's days are nothing to write home about. Meandering, empty, the sort of dull bleakness that made one lose their highs and lows.
With any luck, however, today there might just be a break in the routine.
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Written for the Villain Exchange Program
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Literally living on the wrong side of the tracks.
Great presentation of the underbelly of human Canterlot, and a fascinating take on Fancy Pants. It feels more like a first chapter than a full story, but the word limit's probably less than than this story could be. Plus, there's something to be said for the ambiguity. Gilda's future is in her hands. The question is whether she recognizes that and puts on some gloves. Thank you for the entry.
9248106
You're very welcome. And yeah, I was going for a bit more of an ambiguous angle regarding it. I wanted to make a small glimpse story, with small stakes and somewhat small issues, rather than a larger stake with a lot of character growth. Wanted to shoot for more a 'what if?' and a take on characters in EQG that would not know the existence of the actual MLP world. Thank you for the comment.
On the one hand, I agree with FOME that this feels like a first chapter more than a whole story. On the other hand, the 'rough kid finds an outlet in boxing under the guidance of an older mentor who's been there himself' has been done an awful lot, and it seems like the predictable path for the story would be retreading a lot of familiar ground. So not only is it better not to show that, but there are also enough similar stories that we can take a pretty good guess for ourselves as to what happens next.
The characterisation was really solid here. I particularly liked the subtlety with which Gilda was unhappy with her lot in life; it wasn't hugely self-pitying and it didn't suggest that was all she could be.
Thanks for writing this!
Even though you wrote it for a contest, I‘m happy that you finally wrote a story that focuses on the „bad“ character of the show and how you told us everything that we needed to know about Gildas life, and also this world, without it feeling like there is something missing.
The story, to me, doesnt feel like it has something that has to be told. You have the right mix of lining out the story and telling us whats going on, without infodumping too much, or leaving us wondering about any loose ends. And that is something thats not easy in a oneshot, to have a complete story that doesnt rely on a whole story before that, to get us to care about the characters or to know whats going on. And I think that it is better to be left as a oneshot. If you would write a sequel, it destroys the „magic“ of it. I agree that there is are possibilities of „what if“ scenarios, but this has a satisfying ending without anything that needs to be said, something that you dont always have with a story as „short“ as this. Amazing job, well done!
9248983
Thank you for the review. And yeah, it's a story that's been said in-whole before time and time again, but its setup and overall themes still resonate with a lot of people, so it's good to at least touch upon and nod towards them
9252493
Thanks for the review. And yeah, I actually like Gilda quite a bit, and am going to be finishing up a more long written story with her in the near future.
I love it when people take off-the-beaten-path characters and put them to good use. Even better when they make the character work. This Gilda like her MLP counterpart has a hard edge, but also like her MLP counterpart it's due to the harsh life she's lived. The leaving the money for her mother was a nice touch as is her banter with Fancy Pants of all people.
The world building in this was very nice and giving Canterlot Town a wrong-side-of-the tracks makes for great setting. Boxing is fun and heck I wouldn't mind it if you kept it going to a Million Dollar Gryphon punching her way up through the ranks. Sure we've might have seen that movie, before, but they were good movies.
Not entirely sure why Fancypants is teaching an inner city school