• Member Since 2nd Mar, 2012
  • offline last seen January 17th

Merc the Jerk


Merc's fic guide: by Bookplayer: Is there kicking and/or punching? [Yes/No] Have you considered adding kicking and/or punching? [Yes/No] Have you considered adding more kicking and/or punching?

T
Source

"All it takes is a bit of hope and grit to make things happen." That's a mantra Jack Apple has lived by for years, and one that's served her well. Ever since what happened in her hometown, hope and grit are about the only thing that have kept her going, spending dollars and making dimes as a boxing trainer in Manhattan.

Twila Shields is a new face in town from the almost mystical city of Camelot. What she lacks in social grace, she makes up for with an almost uncanny intelligence.

Together, they soon find themselves on the cusp of changing history. It all comes down to one fight against the champ, and a bit of hope and grit.

Inspired by the Rocky series (Obviously). Special thanks goes to Bookplayer for the initial set-up of the idea, and for being a swell pal. Go read her stuff, yo.

Addational thanks goes to Jake the Ginger and Peregrine Caged for editing. Couldn't do it without you, bros.

Chapters (2)
Comments ( 46 )

Yes! It's finally out!

Wasn't Rocky more about his relationship with Adrian rather than his fight? Here's hoping for a Rarity/Adrian appearance but that's probably too much like The Laughing Shadow and just wishful thinking anyway.

I am intrigued.

3300392
Agreed. The original Rocky was completely different in tone and message than the subsequent films. Hope this story doesn't turn out like Million Dollar Baby.

It looks great so far. Just one little note... your Twi kinda gets over-formal in some spots and starts drifting into Rarity territory in dialogue (unless that's a part of the setting difference.)

But I can't wait for the next chapter!

3300377
Hooray!
3300388
Welcome to the good guy team, Jake. Humanized is an alright thing here, yo.
3300392

Wasn't Rocky more about his relationship with Adrian rather than his fight?

That it was. Likewise, this is going to be a character-driven piece, with the match being the McGuffin like it is in Rocky.
3300501

the original Rocky was completely different in tone and message than the subsequent films.

True. Though Rocky Balboa did a fantastic job bringing the spirit of the first one back--that kinda gritty real underdog story. If you've never seen it, I highly recommend it.
3300519
Thank you kindly for the critique, Book. I'll keep that in mind--I tried to have her sort of nerd and intelligent persona shine forth, but I guess I've been writing way too much damn Rarity and it's spilling out on everything. :duck: I'll keep that in mind for sure. Thanks.

Not a fan of Twijack... But... since it's you... I shall read. :trixieshiftright:

3300519
I actually did mention that he was playing her pretty tight, but figured since we've only just taken our first step into the 'verse and everyone is strangers (including, to an extent, we readers to the characters), that we could shrug it off for a bit. As I like Twilight/Twila, and write her in the Heistverse, I'll keep an eye on this.

Well, am I sucker for anything boxing related...

Dio

Another AU...with the same human characters from your other epic (Laughing Shadow)?

Not much of Twijack fan...but I wasn't a Rarijack fan and you made me love that so I shall read!

Haven't read yet, already liked and fav'd. You see, Merc? This is the impact you, JJ and PC have on this community. I haven't read your story yet and I've already fav'd. I saw you posted it and my first thought was, "Oh, look! Another box-office hit!". :yay:

I will read, count on that. There's no way it can't be good. :raritystarry:

But I have so much miscellaneous shit to catch up on... :fluttershysad:

:trixieshiftright:
:trixieshiftleft:

Better bump this to the top of the list, just to be safe. :trollestia:

Another series for me to obsessively check for updates? Damn it Merc!

3302619
Me too.
3301655
Thanks. I'm not the biggest fan of her either, but I'm hoping writing this'll give me a bit more respect for her.
3302688
I'm glad you're still liking The Laughing Shadow, pal. Yeah, maybe I can make you a believer in this ship too! (Though RariJack will always be top drawer)
3302706

This is the impact you, JJ and PC have on this community.

I don't think it's so much the community as it is you. I'm sure not featured, after all, haha. But I appreciate your words regardless. :twilightsmile:
3302877

3303478
I don't know, man. From what I've seen, your fans seem to love you. I'd say you've made quite the splash. :raritywink:

Actually got around to reading it now and I have to say, Merc, I'm really liking where you're taking this right from the get-go. Character interaction is good, Jack's accent isn't overplayed, making Twila timid in this one is a nice touch. Looks like my previous assessment of the story is right: I'm gonna want to come back for more. :twilightsmile:

Haven't seen the Rocky movies (don't shoot me yet) as I haven't had the chance to see them, but this fic will probably end up changing that. :pinkiesmile:

Awasome like all your work bro

Hmm... You have interested me.
You may continue.

3302706
You're good people, my friend.

3302877
Heh, yeah, he's good at that.

off to a good start so far.
Cant wait to see how things go from here

This should be interesting. I wonder who AJ's gonna fight.

I have got to admit, I am not the biggest fan of the humanized stories because most of them are either second person crap or the main character is someone I am not all that interested, not too mention the stories aren't that appealing. But this one actually drew my attention. Good job.

3307925
Thanks. All my other works I try to show that humanized fics don't have to be 2nd person crap or a wish-fulfillment self-insert, so I honestly appreciate you giving it a chance.

You never described what she was wearing besides shorts, and I kept waiting for the joke about, "Aren't you going to put something else on?"

Yet one more fantastic piece of work for me to follow. Always did like AJ, and I can already tell I'll like her here as well.

Wow, it took me way too long to get around to reading this, :twilightsheepish:

Good stuff man; keep it coming! I'm right there with you on proving that humanized comes in more flavors than vanilla self-insert or 2nd person chocolate, and this story looks like it's gonna be a nice bowl of sweet slice-of-strawberry romance, :yay:

3311163
I was wondering the same thing! I re-read the section a couple times trying to figure out where I'd missed something, but in the end I just sort of decided that she was wearing a tank top, or at least a sports bra, :ajsmug:

Wait, so Jack and Rarity got married and then divorced?? :pinkiegasp: Well, that sucks, they would have been perfect together :raritydespair:

But nice chapter :rainbowwild:

I like how you didn't make the Mane (main?) Six here all good looking on the level of super models. And Rarity and Jack were married once? Wonder if that's going to be an obstacle later on for Jack.

Ha! This was great! I'm loving this.

3371837

A common thing with most stories. Nice to see something different. Makes the girl seem more real and down to earth.

3371748
Which is why I have a RariJack wrote on the site. They're my OTP, but circumstances just didn't allow it in this story. Sometimes things happen even in good relationships.
3371837
Yeah, I try to not make them supermodels in any of my works—even in my more romanticized versions of the characters. It's less fun when they're all pretty much the exact same lookin'. As for their former marriage being a relationship obstacle? Stay tuned, true believer.
3371902
Thanks! I got high hopes for this one, so fingers crossed I can continue putting out a decent story with it.
3371916
Wisdom. Not all of them are going to be supermodel skinny with breasts the size of watermelons. You're going to have body diversity just due to their backgrounds, even.

“I got this series I watch—it starts off kinda so-so, but after about three episodes in, it's really good. Tons of appeal even outside of its target demographic.”

:rainbowlaugh:/:facehoof:/:trollestia: All at once.

Rarijack married and then divorced? Please tell me this is not the future of TLS.

Great chapter, dude. Twila is such a featherweight.

drunk Twi is great. Jack ana Rare huh? That should prove to be an interesting back story while the rest unfolds.

I had a hard time following this. Try attributing your dialogue better, so it's clear who is saying what.

So far it looks good. If there is one thing that you could correct is the, as the faq calls it, "lavender unicorn syndrome". Since we already know who they are, just call them by their name.

3376812
Gonna have to disagree with you on that one. If anything, I sometimes feel I should suggest Merc edit a few of his dialogue tags down. Not often, as...

3377235
...it's his style. It's how he always works, and it's not always a bad thing. If it's a real problem, rest assured I'll mark some removals or changes (have before, in fact).

3458386
Yeah you are right. I shouldn't be such a stickler for rules if it works out.

Great story, I enjoy the human main six. :pinkiehappy:

Im curious to how AJ will get back into the boxing circuit. Plus if she will end up in a match with Iron Will. But cant wait for the next update

It would sure be nifty to have more of this story.

4186032
I'm just trying to finish up The Laughing Shadow first. I got maybe four more chapters tops on it, then I promise I'll get back to working on this guy, amigo. I'll even Pinkie Promise it. :pinkiegasp:

Ok... Stalking this now (insert pinkyspy). This has so much fun potential written all over it ^_^

Mane medic

All I want for Christmas is another chapter of this story.

Any chance on a three-year update?

7632793

I swear I haven't forgot about it. It's just I've been working on other stories and a few RL issues. I'd love to get back into this soon, though.

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