• Member Since 25th Nov, 2014
  • offline last seen April 4th

PumpkinPie59


Just a writer who loves cartoons. Thorax and Pharynx enthusiast. Also, I love Embrax.

T

Applejack and Flim haven’t always gotten along. Differing views and whatnot always got in the way of being friends. Maybe, in this dusty, old, and broken shed, that will change? Or not. Or they could just continue being enemies.

Could an old blanket, the warmest they’ve ever felt, change all that?

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 11 )

Let me say that I don't usually read stories with the 'Romance' tag, but this one caught my eye. And I surely don't regret reading it :raritywink: The flow was great, the atmosphere as well and it managed to give me a smile here and there. The grammar was more or less solid, with the only recurring issue being incorrect capitalisation of dialogue tags. If they contain a speaking action, they should start with a lowercase letter.
The only thing really bugging me was the lack of any explanation of how AJ and Flim ended up locked in the shack, but the story was still enjoyable :pinkiesmile:

9057466
This really brightened my day. Thank you so much for reading this! I’m so glad you enjoyed it. :twilightsmile:

I do have to say, concerning the dialogue tags, I have read/heard otherwise, but I suppose everyone has a different way of writing.

As for how AJ and Flim ended up stuck in the shack ... I still am not quite sure, tbh. I wanted to focus more on the characters, but I tried to hint at something like part of the shed collapsing (besides the roof), causing the door to get stuck, or maybe a tree fell and rolled onto the door, and it was too large to be moved. Either way, I think that it’s better to leave it to the reader’s imagination.

9059044
You are very welcome! :pinkiesmile:

I do have to say, concerning the dialogue tags, I have read/heard otherwise, but I suppose everyone has a different way of writing.

These vary language from language, but at least the basics should be firmly set in English. May I ask, where and what exactly have you read/seen that? I’m curious to know, since it is more or less my daily bread IRL.

As for the shack situation, full-blown explanation would most probably ruin the atmosphere. I was looking just for a more definite hint. Sorry, should have made that clear :twilightsheepish:

9059346
Hmm ... y’know, I’m not quite sure where I heard it. Everything I read says it from your point of view. I suppose you’re right, then. I’ll edit my work and fix that.

Comment posted by PurpleWonderPower deleted Aug 26th, 2018

I love this story so much. It's so adorable. Please write a sequel, I'm absolutely begging you!

9133229
Trust me, AJ and Flim’s story isn’t over. :raritywink:

9134080
When do you reckon you'll write a sequel?

9157788
I don’t know. I have other stories to write before then.

Aww a very cute short story and basically seeing how they can't go anywhere because it's raining they had to stay in the shed but it's cute how much they hug each other so that's nice although I do like to see how they get to know each other a little bit more keep up the good work

Login or register to comment