An awkward encounter
Pegasus ponies, by and large, did not take leaps of faith. As a species with wings, they were quite self-reliant when it came to such matters, and so it was an idiom largely lost upon them as a tribe. It was because of this peculiar fact that Sundance was having trouble; he was now entirely reliant upon his friends saving him from a trouble that he barely understood. More than that, his friends were potentially saving the barony, and the future of the barony. Beyond all of this, they were friends that he hardly knew, in the larger scope of things, with Turmeric being the one that he knew best.
Leaps of faith were more of an earth pony phenomenon, as unicorn ponies used their magic to tweak the dice rolls of the universe to their liking.
And so it was, with progress surrounding him on all sides, Sundance was left unsettled. Anxious. Fretful. In dire, desperate need of a good flight. With his emotional turmoil came grief, a profound sense of loss, and he found himself missing his retainer. Cucumber would have just the right words to say, said in the quaint manner in which he said them, and after a good talk, everything would be better.
Alone in a crowd, surrounded by those who believed in him, in his cause, Sundance found himself isolated. His current choice of company was Cucumber’s grave and the tiny crystal tree; fine companions for his mood as he struggled to sort himself out. But the grave, it was silent, with no wisdom offered, and the tree had nothing to say.
Some distance away, the gatehouse was raised with marvellous rapidity. The transition between natural canyon wall and stone blocks was almost seamless, a most curious achievement. Several domes were in various states of completion. The first dome, the demonstration dome, now had windows, a door, a stove pipe jutting out of the top, and strips of sod were now laid over the top of the miraculous structure.
Surely Princess Celestia had a reason for allowing all of this to happen, even with his debt. There was some meaning to be had, to be found, some well-hidden treasure of wisdom. Was this a test of his mettle? It was a nebulous, almost abstract fearful thing that he barely understood. He wasn’t smart enough to understand the debt he’d been saddled with, only that it had grown for several generations. The previous Milord had inherited it—and did everything possible to make it worse.
There was something to be said about the raw destructive power of compound interest.
Sundance’s sigh was a heavy sigh indeed, the sort of sigh made by a troubled soul, crushed to the point of collapse by a myriad of troubles. It was the sort of sigh common to angsty teenagers, ennui-stricken beat poets, and shoegazing philosophy majors just starting their career with the Funtastic Fryolator Five-Thousand.
For the very first time in his life, at least, it felt that way, Sundance gave serious thought to the meaning of life. What was the point? Oh, sure, he’d thought about this during his teenage years, those awkward times, but he was sheltered then, protected from the worst the world had to offer by his mother. Death had not truly touched him—Cucumber’s death in particular. His was a life now divided, seperated, bisected into two parts; pre- and post-barony.
The last time he’d wondered about the meaning of life, he’d been a stupid kid. Now, he was a stupid adult who, for some inexplicable reason, was responsible for the lives of others, without knowing or understanding what the meaning of life was, or what was the point of anything. Which really put a new perspective on things, a real incentive to hurry up and come to some manner of understanding.
He understood bureaucracy, at least as much as any pony could understand bureaucracy, so much so that it bothered him that he had a knack for it. Accounting though, was a whole nother animal. Forms and processing were second nature to him, but finding love, settling down, and starting a legacy was a complete unknown. Mares baffled him—stallions too, but he found himself leaning towards mares, at least for now, due to practical reasons.
With his life now so complicated, he had no idea how to talk to them, how to connect with them. Not that he’d ever been successful in this area, but now, he couldn’t just present himself to a potential mate and do whatever wingspan display that might come to mind. No, that just wouldn’t work. He’d have to explain himself, explain the barony, reveal his every complication, and worse, he’d have to explain The Debt. It was only fair for a potential mate to know what they were getting into, up front, so they could make the sane decision and flee.
Surely, Princess Celestia had thought ahead about all of this, and she no doubt had contingency plans. As with anything else remotely connected to her somehow, this was all a test of character—a bewildering test with multiple choice questions, most of which could not be read. The options taken were the answers and the questions, perhaps.
“Baron Sundance, sorry to intrude.”
A fresh-faced, bright eyed earth pony mare stood just a few yards away, shuffling her hooves about in an apologetic way. When he looked at her, she smiled, but also averted her gaze. She was flustered about something, but he had no idea what, and was far too distracted to make any attempts at discerning the cause.
“You have a visitor. Incoming, from the northwest. The guards were scrambled to act as escorts. They’ll be landing on the airstrip shortly.”
“I’ll be right there,” Sundance said to the flustered, squirmy young mare.
A pegasus mare touched down, flanked on both sides by armored pegasus guards. Sundance was mildly annoyed by all of this, but he understood the need for security. The guards seemed friendly enough, and the mare did not seem to be overly concerned by the escort. She did appear troubled though, but it was obvious that the guards were not the cause.
Just as Sundance was about to go over and introduce himself to the sky blue mare, a colour that made her almost invisible in open sky, he noticed a vividly yellow head poking up out of a carrier slung from the mare’s neck. One mare, one foal, and a great deal of luggage, all strapped on in some haphazard way that couldn’t be good for flying. Before anything was said, Sundance attempted mental arithmetic and suffered analysis paralysis.
“Thanks,” the mare said to the guards on either side of her. “I’m not used to such long distance flights. It was nice gliding in your slipstream.”
Then, after taking a deep breath, the mare exclaimed, “Whew! Lord Sumac wasn’t kidding about the smell! It’s breathtaking! Really bad eggs!”
One of the guards sniggered, but nothing was said.
“Welcome to Rotten Egglünd,” Sundance said to his visitor as he recovered himself. Saying these words reminded him that Corduroy could somehow hear umlauts, which he was certain was some kind of omelette, since Corduroy only heard umlauts when he said, ‘Rotten Egglünd.’ Before he became any more distracted, he introduced himself with a smile. “I’m Sundance.”
When the mare folded her wings against her sides, Sundance suffered a lapse of concentration.
“I’m Express Delivery, and Lord Sumac told me to come here.”
The mare’s words left Sundance torn, uncertain of where to start, or what to ask.
“I need a place to live,” she said as she bounced in place and nosed her foal. “I flew to Lulamoon Hollow from Vanhoover, but Lord Sumac has an application process that I was unaware of, and as it turns out he is choosy about new residents. He wants scientists, technicians, engineers, and mathematicians. And little me, I’m none of those things. He told me that you’ll take anypony. Is it true that you let diamond dogs live here?”
Right away, Sundance’s mood shifted, and he felt his feathers bristling. “Is that a problem?”
Ears back, the mare shook her head. “No… no, not particularly. It’s just… well, it’s just a bit scary, that’s all. I didn’t mean to offend. Really, I didn’t. I’m sorry.”
Hearing her apologetic tone, Sundance made himself relax a bit. A mare with a foal had a right to be worried about safety, he told himself, and he hoped that this was a problem that would sort itself out. Though it was rude to stare, he studied her, trying to read her face, all while wondering if he too, should have some kind of application policy for new residents.
Armor clanking, the guards made themselves scarce.
Extending one wing, the mare brushed her white mane away from her face, touched her foal’s cheek, and then folded her wing back against her side. Sundance watched her every move, trying to see what he might learn about her from sight alone. The foal was practically a newborn, from the looks of it, and swaddled as it was, he couldn’t tell if it was a pegasus or an earth pony. It wasn’t a unicorn, because no horn was visible.
“We do things differently here,” Sundance said at last. “All are welcome, and by all, I mean all. Griffons, diamond dogs… species doesn’t matter. Should species ever become a problem, you are free to go. That’s my policy. Is it understood?”
“Yeah.” Express Delivery nodded.
“Interesting name you have,” he said to her.
“Well, I named myself after my business. Wanted ponies to remember me. I do package delivery. Well, I did. Uh, things are up in the air at the moment. The money was lousy.”
“Yeah, the money isn’t great.” Sundance immediately took advantage of the common ground he found himself standing upon. “I did delivery work too. Medical supplies and hospital work. I’m licensed and bonded. Still didn’t make enough money to clear rent on my own.”
“Oh, yeah… yeah… that was my problem too!”
“Rent is bad on the west coast?” he asked.
“I think it might be worse than the east coast,” she replied. “When I was pregnant, I started midwife classes, so I could add another delivery service to my delivery service. But, uh, well, life just sort of fell apart, you know? You know how it is. You think you have everything planned, and then life decides to upend you.”
He nodded, and when he did, she did too, which left the two of them doing the pegasus head-bobbing thing that other ponies frequently made fun of. Thankfully, Sundance did not suffer a moment of self-consciousness, and it felt nice to connect with another pegasus. While he wanted another flier for the barony, he knew that it was best to play it cool.
“So, midwifery?” Sundance struck a pegasus pose without realising that he’d done so.
“Well, I started the courses. Didn’t get to finish them. I was four away from getting my stamped certificate when everything fell apart. You know, you’re a lot friendlier than Lord Sumac.”
“I am?” Suspicious, Sundance wondered if he was being buttered up.
“Oh, he’s nice enough, but he didn’t say much. Quiet sort, I guess. I don’t know what his deal was. Maybe he didn’t see the point in saying much because I didn’t meet his standards.”
Curious, Sundance sought out more information about the mare seeking residency, and he asked, “So, what is it exactly that brings you here, to this place? Why come here? Why leave the city? Something made you leave Vanhoover for Lulamoon Hollow. On the run from something? In trouble? Why fly away and leave everything behind?”
Express Delivery deflated, so much so that a vulgar raspberry escaped her pursed lips, and this caused the foal’s ears to prick. There was anger in the mare’s eyes, and something else, something that looked an awful lot like fear. It was easier to read pegasus faces and pegasus eyes, because pegasus ponies shared a common, unspoken language, something vaguely equine-avian in nature.
“My ex is an asshole,” she muttered, spitting and spraying the words.
“Oh.”
“Don’t get the wrong idea,” she said, her eyes flashing like angry thunderheads. “He’s not a hitter, or anything. But he’s real controlling. Lots of ultimatums. ‘If you don’t do this, you force me to do this’ bullshit so that everything is all my fault. I didn’t want my daughter growing up and thinking that was acceptable.”
“Might I ask a question?”
“Sure, why not?” Express Delivery’s eyes still flashed with tumultuous emotion.
“Why hook up with somepony like that?” asked Sundance, who sought open exchange.
“Honestly?” The mare’s eyes blinked once and all traces of anger vanished, only to be replaced with sadness. “He was the go-getter type. Ambitious. I thought I could change a few bad habits. But he ended up changing me, and I found myself compromising more and more of my values just to keep him happy. I kept telling myself that in the long term, everything would be okay, that every couple goes through a bit of turbulence. I’ve had some time to think about it as I flew from Vanhoover to Lulamoon Hollow.”
“I never understood that,” Sundance said to her whilst he shook his head. “Why is it that mares have to find some jerk and then hope to change him into a nice guy, when there are so many nice guys in the first place that don’t need changing. I’ve never understood this. Why?”
Express Delivery looked away, and shuffled about with an uncertain expression. “I don’t know,” she squeaked. “That’s the way of things, I guess? There’s something about an aggressive go-getter. Look, I never gave it much thought. Now I have something to think about when my foal keeps me up at night. I’d chalk it up to pegasus stupidity, but I think all tribes do it. But especially us pegasus ponies. Us mares like big dominating males with big proud displays. It’s hard to concentrate when you’re swooning.”
Disgusted, Sundance snorted.
“Lulamoon Hollow had a paper application. It took hours to fill out. I wasn’t expecting this at all.” She flicked her tail from side to side, shifted her weight from her left to her right, and tried to bounce her gear to a more comfortable position. “I don’t know where else to go. My mother won’t help me… she told me that I shit in my nest and I need to be the one that cleans it out. I also got an ‘I told you so’ or three out of her. And to be fair, she did try to tell me so. She also told me that when things went south for the winter that there would be no help to be had.”
Hearing this, Sundance set aside his own feelings of disgust and so he listened.
“Now I seem to have offended you, and I understand why, and so, uh, here I am, wondering where I might fly to next. I hear there’s a colony in the Froggy Bottom Bogg.”
“You don’t want to go there,” Sundance said in a level deadpan. “The approach is nightmarish. It involves crashing through the canopy and then flying between the trees. Besides, I’m not asking you to leave. I have no idea what I’m doing, and so far, with everypony that’s come here, I’ve struck up a conversation with them to get to know them. There’s no real application process, just an informal meet and greet. This one just didn’t go as smoothly as the others.”
“Why let me stay?” she asked.
“It’s the right thing to do,” he replied.
“I don’t understand.”
“That’s two of us. I don’t either.”
The both of them narrowed their eyes and cast a stern avian gaze upon one another as an unspoken conversation took place. Ears pivoted, changed angles, and feathers ruffled. As awkward as this was, Sundance found that he missed this, he missed these interactions that were entirely unique to pegasus ponies. When he chuffed, she snorted in reply, and then, with no words spoken, everything was fine and the bad air between them was left clear.
“You’re not the dominating type,” she said in a soft voice. “That’s different…”
“I don’t try to impose my will on others,” he replied, explaining himself.
“But… you’re the baron. Isn’t that your job?”
“Only when absolutely necessary. Otherwise, no.”
“Well, that’s… I, uh… well… erm…”
“Yes?” He drew out the word, uncertain of what Express Delivery was trying to say.
“Oh, nothing.”
“Must be something.”
“Well, it is something—”
“Is that so? Well, out with it then. This could not possibly be more awkward.”
“Uh”—she floundered for a bit, her eyes darting from side to side—“when you put it that way. Just a moment ago I got to thinking that I was ready to compromise my values again, just like with my ex… just so I’d have a place to live. You know, to make things easier. Crazy stuff goes through my head, sometimes.”
“That’s not allowed,” Sundance said with as much aggressiveness as he could muster. “You can stay or go, that’s up to you, but you keep your values intact. I’ll not have that bad wind blowing through my barony. I don’t take advantage of my subjects. Let me make this clear; you are not beholden to me if you stay here, and at no time will I impose myself upon you. Is the sky clear between us?”
“Not a cloud to be seen,” she replied, and for the first time, her ears pricked in a hopeful manner.
“Will you stop being nervous?” he asked.
“No,” she replied. “I’m a flighty sort. Plus, I’m still not sure where we stand. I’m tired, I’ve flown a long way, I just broke up with my ex, and my head is filled with crazy thoughts. I’m not myself right now. And you… you just got under my skin like nopony else ever has, not even my mother.”
“Come on, I’ll show you around,” Sundance offered. “Hollyhock is a new mom, and she’s got two foals already. I think she’ll be happy to have somepony to talk to. Normally, things are a whole lot quieter around here, but you came at a busy time.”
“So that’s it then?” Express Delivery sounded dubious. “I get a place to stay and there’s no strings attached? I just get what I need, right? When I first heard about baronies on the radio, I didn’t know what to think. Sounded a bit like some cult commune, sorta like what Starlight Glimmer did. How do things work, exactly? What’s expected of me?”
“For now,” Sundance replied, “nothing. Just settle in. Later, we’ll figure out what you’re good at, and we’ll put you to work. You’ll get a house, but you might have to share. Come along, follow me, and let’s get you off your hooves before you fall over from exhaustion. Besides, I’m in dire need of some tea. How about you?”
“Oh, a cup sounds lovely, thank you. But if you don’t mind me asking, do you have any coffee?”
Hearing this, Sundance cringed so hard that he almost broke his face.
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Coffee?! Hooliganism!
She asked for coffee.
I already like her.
9588221
Coffee is just a subgenre of tea
I wonder if she'll be a background character.
Birb communication for the win(g)
9588242
Heretic! Heretic, I say! Coffee is the Master Drink!
(Mom used to use it to calm me DOWN as a child. :D )
Is the Baronial law that all must take tea at least once a day still in effect?
Disturbance? Where?
I'm ferpectly pine with this new development. Love how you've characterized Expy. ;)
Nice burly earth pony mare clearly has eyes for you and you don't even pay her a lick of attention! Bad Sundance.
9588242
9588292
Barbarism, you can’t put a slice of lemon in coffee.
9588537
Yes you can, just hold a lemon slice over a cup of coffee and squeeze, whether that actually tastes good is up for debate
I’ll take coffee
And then the winged hussars arrived
Could be worse. She could be my kind of girl....and drink both.
I love how wings have grown into a language on this site
9588671
that was your doing
"Mood Wings" is like required reading to understand like half the Pegasie on this website
I ship it
I prefer hot chocolate.
9588537
Sure you can. I do it regularly. :D
Sundance has had so much of his world view shattered and rearranged thus far, but is he ready to face the gravest challenge of them all: Coffee Drinkers?
9588726
Actually, considering the name, she's the one that handles shipping.Good bit: new pegasus, bad bit: coffee drinking heretic.
Love the new character, almost thought it was Fleetfoot at first.
I’m interested in seeing how Sumac actually acts as an adult. I wonder if her impression of him is accurate or perhaps biased.
Sundance’s comments almost come across as r/niceguys in this chapter.
If I drink both, does a single drop off coffee make me a hooligan period, or does consuming both make for some is hybrid?
New pegasus for the barony, fun.
Interesting.
9589014
Nooo, it makes you bi.
9589029
Oh, duh. There was a story about that even...gosh
9588958
She likely mistook his extreme introversion as being antisocial and dismissive of her. Considering she seems to have a somewhat low opinion of males in general at the moment, especially ones in a position of authority, regardless of whether they've done anything to her or not, she probably assumed that he was already against her.
Or he could sense she would work better for Sundance than in his land.
9588958
He's been in this story.
9589041
Sumac avoids saying too much, due to charisma / influence magic and spoken words. So he comes across as aloof.
9588809
I think you're mixing up the pegasus Express Delivery with the earth pony mare that told Sundance she was flying in.
9589052
9589044
Ah, still hasn't gotten a handle on that. Or at least enough to be completely confident. Sumac's got it rough. By staying quiet he was actually NOT exercising authority over her. The opposite of what it seems she might have believed.
Many years ago I was allowed to sit in on a philosophy lecture at the local university. The Professor asked all philosophy majors to raise their hands. He then asked everyone with their hands raised to lower them if they were going to attend seminary or go on to a doctorate. I recall around four hands being lowered an another 20 or so still being up. That's when the Professor said something like, "I want the rest of you to learn this phrase, it will serve you well in the years to come 'Do you want fries with that?'"
About a quarter of those who raised their hands got up and walked out. It's been about 20 years, I wonder how those majors are doing.
9588539
Kinda like adding salt to coffee. I might have to try the lemon some time.
Coffee?! A hooligan enters the barony!
9588842
I like heretics. They drink coffee.
9573310
More (than half his age): age > (0.5*20)
Between 10 and infinity
(More than half) his age: age = (x>0.5) * 20
Between 10 and infinity
If it really means less than 10 in some way English is fucking stupid.
9589936
The Civil War is only discussed in the past tense. It is something that happened, that occasionally characters reference.
In other stories, there are other references for people to piece various bits together, but that's it. It is simply a bit of background.
I'm getting Vault-tec vibes from the way Baron Sumac seems to be choosing his residents. Kinda short sighted to only have the scientific community and no-one to mop the floor, or fix a door.
Might need help from Sundance's Barony in the future.
Also:
i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/001/052/789/748.gif
9589388
Are the fries there when I'm not? Is the ding really whence the fries art done?
9590623
Unless of course, you have a fully functioning barony with multiple generations of floor sweepers. Which is the case.
9588242
Rather the opposite, I'm afraid.
Tea is just weak coffee with a disappointing lack of beans.
What is it with Tea Drinks and their hatred of Coffee? It seems like from casual observation that fewer Coffee people hate tea, compared to the Tea people who hate Coffee. Is this like an Us vs Them thing, or...? Which is weird because in OUR universe the Coffee Drinkers won, but in THEIR universe they lost. Then again maybe it's just because they created a battle in and of itself in this Universe? Curious.
9589044
Would love to hear your input on this strange but unimportant question!
9598565
As a tea drinker, I hate the assumption that everyone has to like or drink coffee. It kind of gets on my nerves. "But if you try X coffee, you'll like it." That sort of thing. :p
Plus, the coffee thing is partly being played up in the story for comedic effect. It's one of the prejudices that Sundance has.
Here I'm wondering if it's a sin to drink both; coffee in the morning, tea in the evening...