Making the case for abduction
“Sunny, you have an owl on your head.”
Smiling, Sundance allowed his mother to see him as he was. “I get told that a lot, actually. His name is Owlister.”
“I’ve never slept in a birdhouse before,” Sunbeam remarked while tossing her head around. “You know, I might have to invest in a sleeping box. I think I rather liked it. Something about it satisfies, you know what I mean?”
“I’m glad I had a second cargo crate.” Sundance watched as his mother sorted herself out and grinned as the mischievous wind teased her. Things were different now between them, some fundamental aspect of their relationship had changed over night. Whatever they once had was no more, it was gone now, and replaced with something else, something better, perhaps. But for all of the many thoughts running laps inside of his mind, all that came out of his mouth was small talk.
“Do you really have to go so soon?” he asked.
“I wish I didn’t,” she replied while she shook her short, bobbed mane, a vain attempt to make it somewhat presentable. “Things aren’t good, Sunny. The day after you left, they bumped all our shifts up to twelve hours. Unrest is getting worse. With the war, the lack of jobs, and everything else, the city feels more and more like a boil, ready to pop. They’re talking about curfews, Sunny. Curfews. Ponies who work the night shifts will have to have a pass or face arrest for being out after dark. Thefts are at an all time high.”
Pressing his lips together, Sundance scowled. “There’s a mare here who stole. She was trying to feed her foals—”
“That’s no excuse!”
“Actually, Mom, I think it is.” Seeing the fury in his mother’s eyes, he stood his ground, even though it made him mightily uncomfortable to do so. “I’ve talked to her a bit, Mom. Now, I’m not excusing what she’s done, but I understand why she did it. The powers-that-be sent her here, for whatever reason.”
“She needs to be in prison! A clear message must be sent to the others!”
“And what about her foals? Toss them into an already overcrowded orphanarium? What is it that you keep telling me? That those foals are just criminals in waiting? That we should just save time and money by shipping them all off to penal colonies, because that’s where they’ll end up? What’s already being done clearly isn’t working.” His mother’s feathers were ruffled—big time—and he saw her biting her lip. “I’m glad she was sent here. Perhaps I can break the cycle. Perhaps I can do something better. Her life is mine to do with as I see fit, and I aim to make something worthwhile with it.”
Sunbeam fumed, she stared down her muzzle with a ferocious scowl for a time, but then her expression changed to one of confused befuddlement. “I’ve never seen you like this before, Sunny. You stood up to me. Why, I think you almost bared your teeth for a moment. This isn’t like you at all.” She blinked, now more confused than ever. “Sunny, are you telling me that you… that you… are you saying that you own another pony?”
Huffing, he turned away with such suddenness that Owlister let out an alarmed hoot.
“Sundance, answer me.”
“Look, I’m not keen on the idea, Mom. That’s one part of the job that I’m not comfortable with. Not at all. It’s the way things are. They’re mine and I’m responsible for them. I must provide for their needs. I am the Baron of this demesne. It scares me… I’m still trying to make sense of it all.”
“Maybe we should go back to the old ways and old days,” Sunbeam said, her muzzle contorting in unpleasant ways. “What we’re doing now clearly isn’t working. Sundance, I’d better never hear of you exploiting your position, or so help me—”
“I know, Mom, I know!” Again, he whirled about and again, Owlister let out an alarmed hoot while trying to hold on. “The last lord of the land was a despicable two-bit shit! He obviously didn’t have a mother he was afraid of disappointing! He did atrocious things that every day I learn a little more about and it makes me sick! It makes me sick and I’m under all this pressure and I know I have to do right and I’m constantly worrying if I’m the right pony for this job!”
“There’s no way I raised a shirker.” Sunbeam’s voice was a frosty deadpan, devoid of emotion or feeling. Her ears were rigid, erect, and her nostrils were wide, flaring. “I raised a perfect son who is more than capable of doing anything asked of him. A son with limitless potential. Doubt is the enemy. So you take that doubt, you smack it down, and you trample it to a fine bloody mess under hoof. We’re pegasus ponies… we’re pegasus ponies of an ancient and storied bloodline. It was you that restored our past, and with our past in mind, we must face our future. Mine is protecting the city… and you… your future is here, doing whatever it is that you must do. No doubt, no fear, no shirking!”
“Yeah!” Sundance had no idea what had come over him at the moment, but he liked it.
“We don’t get pushed around, we throw down!” Sunbeam shouted.
“Yeah!”
“You be a good lord of the land and remember to drink your tea. We can’t have you succumbing to hooliganism. Stay away from coffee, it’s bad for you. Don’t let anything eat your peasants. Make them eat you instead! Ram your way down their throat and eviscerate them from the inside! And remember, no shirking.”
“Yeah? From the inside?” Sundance deflated a bit as a vague sense of unease crept over him. “You’re leaving.”
“I have a long way to fly home, Sunny. Trains are too expensive and rent is far too costly.”
“Mom, are you going to be okay without me there to help with the rent?”
“You have enough to worry about, Sunny. I’ll manage.” His mother’s sad eyes stood out in sharp contrast to her stony exteriour. “That was quite a storm last night, Sunny. I’ve never seen anything quite like it. This place of yours is amazing. Try to get some electricity going before I stop in again.”
Before he was prepared for it, his mother embraced him and Sundance was caught off guard. She squeezed him, kissed him once just below his eye, squeezed him for a second time, and then, before pulling away, she said, “I love you, Sunny. Do what you must to make the world a better place, okay?”
“Sure thing, Mom.” Steeling himself, he watched as she slipped away. “I love you too.”
Then, with a smile on her face, she spread her wings and took flight. In mere moments, she had gained considerable altitude, circling to catch whatever updrafts there might be, and then she took off in a south-easterly direction. Watching her go, he was already missing her, and wondering when he might see her again.
In no time at all, she was a speck on the horizon.
Whatever mess the storm had left behind was already gone. Everything was already neat and tidy. Sundance appreciated how little he had to do to keep this place orderly. His peasants, the good ponies that they were, took pride in where they lived. They were good ponies, remarkably so, and deserved a worthwhile guardian.
He thought of what his mother said just before leaving.
“Milord, a word if I might.” Earwig approached with her ears pinned back and her head down. “It’s Hollyhock, Milord.”
“Is something wrong, Earwig?” He gave his full attention to the mare, because this wasn’t like her at all. Since when was she so subdued?
“Call it a bad feeling, Milord. She’ll pop soon—”
“Soon? How soon?”
“Well, it’s spring. Foaling happens in the spring, ‘cept when it don’t. I don’t mean to cause a fuss, but I have me a bad feeling about this. Her back is hurting her a lot. Her piss is the wrong colour and it smells off too. Her teats is sore and too tender to touch. I’m telling ya this because ya care about these things, Sire.” Earwig glanced around, her eyes shifty, and then she whispered, “She won’t say a thing because she’s hardheaded and don’t want to cause no fuss.”
“I could haul her into Canterlot—”
“Sire, I’m not one to tell ya what to do, but she’s fit to pop any day now. Her back is killing her. I don’t think she needs to be jostled around. When I touched her stomach this morning, she bawled like a kicked foal.”
Chewing his lip, Sundance thought about his options. There wasn’t a lot of money. Earwig was right; hauling Hollyhock into town was probably a bad idea. Something needed to be done, but he wasn’t sure what it was. Earwig was asking him for help though, which he took as a promising sign.
“Sire…”
“Yes, Earwig?”
“Sire, you could go a-raiding. One of the other tribes around here might have a midwife you could steal. Just swoop in and snatch her. Then she’ll be ours.”
“How would I know which one is the midwife?” he asked before his brain could apply some reasoning.
Frowning, Earwig shook her head from side to side. “I don’t know.”
“If I snatched a midwife, what makes you think she’d help us?” Sundance entertained the idea, but only in a theoretical sense; it was something he would never act on, and he was shocked that Earwig would even suggest such a thing.
“Milord, a hot poker is a powerful tool for convincing. Ya wouldn’t have to brand her, just wave it around a bit. Let her smell the smoke coming off of it. She’ll come around to our way of thinking, right fast. Let Cucumber do his thing if yer squeamish.”
“Earwax… would you want me to do that to one of you?” His words caused considerable confusion in the poor mare, and she gave him a blank stare in return. “Would you want me to threaten you with a hot poker?”
“But… yer one of us, Milord. You’ve shown that. You saved my sister. I’m not saying to burn the poor lass. She’d have to be made to do right until she was one of us.”
“With a hot poker?” he asked.
“Well, that’s one way,” she replied.
“Earwig, I can’t spot a midwife from the air. I mean, I have no way of knowing. Also, I have no intention of snatching another pony. That’d be barbaric. After I’ve done so much to earn your trust, I can’t believe you’d ask me to do something horrible to another pony. Wouldn’t that make me not-trustworthy?”
“You do alright by us.” Earwig gave him a dense, sullen stare. “I don’t much care what you do to others. We look out for our own. There’s just us, our tribe, and this barony. We could use a few new faces around here, and you’d do well to take those faces from those with faces to spare.”
Sundance began to understand why he was in charge.
“Would you want to be taken by another baron?” he asked.
“That depends.”
“Oh, I want to hear this. Do tell.”
“Well, that depends if he uses the hot poker or not. If he just waves it around and lets me smell the smoke, it might not be so bad. I might be okay. But if he’s all touchy-touchy with the hot poker, I’d have my hopes high that you’d come to rescue me. You’d come and fetch me if I was stolen, right?”
As much as he wanted this to be a joke, he saw that Earwig was serious. Clearly, he needed to be serving more tea, because this reeked of hooliganism. Rather than chastise her, rather than scold her, he chose to put her mind at ease. “Yes, I’d come and rescue you. Now, if you will excuse me, I need to figure out where to find a midwife.”
“Milord, yer the best. Thanks!” With a pleased smile, Earwig shuffled off.
Muttering to himself, Sundance worried that tea would have to be served twice a day.
Stats
Page generated in 0.061 seconds
Total duration
998 users online
1,649,454 hits today, 2,280,440 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
All this talk of hooliganism made me think, does Sunbeam consider Luna a hooligan?
9266159
The mental image of Luna being dragged down the hall by her ear is hilarious.
So, for us Southerners, would sweet tea suffice? I mean, Hooliganism is bad, but not having sweet tea is worse.
Clearly he just needs a giant sign that says mid wife here with a giant arrow lol
Eh, he doesn't have to steal one, he could just ask regional places if they have a midwife he could borrow, surely he could offer some sort of compensation if needed. Heck, if it's not a pegasus, he's good with that sky cart.
9266162
Assuming the princesses had parents, guardians, or whatever, it's quite likely that it happened. Luna would be the rambunctious one.
Or, taking what sweetie belle said at a stretch, he could just try and convince someone that their cutie mark totally made them midwife material and if they bought it hard enough it might work.
9266166
A hot cuppa will keep the hooliganism at bay. But a glass of sweet tea? That'll kick it in the jimmies and tell it it's not welcome 'round here.
I swear, it has to be regional. I brewed sweet tea all the time at home and when I worked at Waffle House. It was always a slice of heaven. Then I moved to Michigan. It's got to be altitude or weather or humidity or something but I cannot make a decent batch of sweet tea to save my soul!
And DON'T get me started on the unsweetened tea shtick up here. "Oh, just add some sugar to it, what's the difference?" Sir/Madam, you have offended common decency with that statement! You need to go down south and sample it to understand the error of your ways. Until then, I bid you good day.
I SAID GOOD DAY!
What would a midwife's cutie mark look like, actually? That's got me right curious. And I imagine that it wouldn't be pleasant, being a pegasus or earth pony midwife.
It seems like the best thing to do would be to go to one of his neighbors and ask for the assistance of a midwife. The Lulamoon lands aren't far from him and have an interest in his success as well as almost certainly having midwives.
9266198
Idea: a pony called Multitool who's both gullible and has the vaguest qutie mark in history.
9266201
Texas boy here, totally agree! My mom sends me CASES of lipton. I think it's a different blend even though it's the same box. But getting it shipped to WI where I live now, I can get a little taste of home when the wife makes gumbo or Mexican food.
But without hooliganism how can we have a decent game of football?
Birdhouse buddies!
Pegasi are very dramatic.
That does not sound like the description of a pregnancy that is coming to a good end.
No kidding.
9266201
It's the water. Same thing with bagels, they just aren't the same outside NYC/NJ.
But....Luna LOVES coffee! I wonder of Luna is a hooligan. It may explain her outbursts if so.....
Poor Sundance he has things rather rough. Now he has to go get himself a midwife, on top of all his other duties! @.@
I mean, I see no rational reason he can't just go to a neighboring Barony and just ask.
That, and kidnapping would be very very rude.
9266170
They had elders. Though, when we learned some about Celestia's youngster years, I don't remember hearing anything about Luna at all. When we heard that she went across the world slaughtering every other alicorn she could find, there was no mention of Luna at her side. ... Hm.
9266170
You’d think so. But no. Celestia is a brash extroverted explosion of domination and matriarchial fertility. Sol Invictus, daybringer, princess of the four nations, vanquisher of draquoniqui and dragons, deathless alicorn ascendent and undefeated, mistress of battle, immortal warrior goddess of harmony and days light undimmed.
Quite a handful, and an unrestrained narcissist. Luna was the quiet troubled introverted one who finally snaped. And is it any wonder with a monster of a sister like that to compete with?
9266700
Celly Belly only pretends to be extroverted.
9266556
I did high school in SE PA, so I know what you mean. And once you move away from the area, do NOT expect people shilling "Philly cheese steaks" to know what they're doing. "Meat. Cheese. Roll. Done." Constant disappointment. My wife thought I was just exaggerating how good a real Philly cheese steak was until our first trip to PA for Christmas. She took one bite and said, "Holy crap, this really is so much better."
Every place has that "just not right outside the area" food. When I moved to Michigan, I discovered their Pączki. I tried explaining it to my sister in PA. "Sounds like a donut." It is so much more. Thank heavens they're only once a year or I could easily be diabetic from them.
Dang it, now I'm hungry ^^
9266753
Lol. Don't come to Chicago. Trust me, with the Polish contingent down here, Paczki day is every day. I don't know a Polish bakery that doesn't have them all the time, though the flavors available get insane the closer you get to Lent.
My waistline concurs :)
9266372
I think that Sundance is more of a cricket sort of chap. He’d fit right in with the Barmy Army.
hooliganism! hooliganism i say!
more tea!
A midwife might say that she needs a doctor, and then he’ll have to go and snatch away a doctor.
I wonder, does the Gringineers include any doctors or midwives?
9266793
What about the perogis (pronounced pero-hees)?
All this talk about hot pokers and smelling the smoke from them and waving them around and abducting ponies... gets me wondering what might or might not be innuendo...
Its alright to wave your hot poker around, just don't touch anyone with it.
Keep your poker tucked away. No one wants to see that.
9266700
9266712
And Luna only seems introverted because of her self esteem issues.
I think Estee just retired a fairly competent one if SD can fly to another AU? Lol
pics.me.me/ismell-heresy-34026945.png
Coffee is good for you. You want to see a hooligan, try and take my coffee. I'll show you a hooligan
🍵☕ My coffee!
9638576
images-wixmp-ed30a86b8c4ca887773594c2.wixmp.com/f/422be9cc-5422-49ee-ac0a-aa164ced9a6b/d9ludm7-b6e65331-94c9-4833-8055-c8e2fe684cb7.png?token=eyJ0eXAiOiJKV1QiLCJhbGciOiJIUzI1NiJ9.eyJzdWIiOiJ1cm46YXBwOjdlMGQxODg5ODIyNjQzNzNhNWYwZDQxNWVhMGQyNmUwIiwiaXNzIjoidXJuOmFwcDo3ZTBkMTg4OTgyMjY0MzczYTVmMGQ0MTVlYTBkMjZlMCIsIm9iaiI6W1t7InBhdGgiOiJcL2ZcLzQyMmJlOWNjLTU0MjItNDllZS1hYzBhLWFhMTY0Y2VkOWE2YlwvZDlsdWRtNy1iNmU2NTMzMS05NGM5LTQ4MzMtODA1NS1jOGUyZmU2ODRjYjcucG5nIn1dXSwiYXVkIjpbInVybjpzZXJ2aWNlOmZpbGUuZG93bmxvYWQiXX0.XrIqiyihBIfvciafCzRgGGHtCuMIv--mGFGjMid3M3Y luna agrees