- Member Since 26th Dec, 2014
- offline last seen April 3rd
Gruvian Scripts
Bringing some class to perversion, but not too much.
Gruvian Scripts
Joined 26th Dec, 2014 ·
Offline
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I gotta say I loved this one. Dash being feisty is always pretty hot. I'd read another one similar to this. Good read!
Hey... That's pretty good, do more of that
Do a sequel.
This story I like it !
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I agree. Do it.
Your tenses are inconsistent - some paragraphs seem to be in present tense, when everything else is in the past.
Otherwise a pretty nifty read, though.
Good ole Zootopia XD
Giggity!
A lot of commas I noticed being placed wrong, but other than that, it was fantastic.
Whelp, this is sort of awkward.
Right after I release this sort of fan fic, the show introduces a similar ship for Dash. I'm honestly laughing my @$$ off at the timing.
A few tense changes and gramatical errors but I'd be reallly wrong if I said I didn't utterly enjoy this story! ^^
Although less intense tha other clop fics I read, the setting was perfect and the situation seemed as though you were writing from experience.
In short, I loved it.
"Cherry boy" is the appropriate term. I think 'cheery boy' would be a typo.
SpaceBalls reference?
That first comma was unnecessary. "Inexperienced" is one word.
Another unneeded first comma.
Did you mean "abyss"?
No! Bad comma! Sit! Roll over!
"Walked up to the queen, said with a smirk 'his name's Chewie, I'm Captain Kirk.'"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=C4zbBEifkrU
Dig it, could like a series with the comings and goings of ponies on earth