• Member Since 10th Dec, 2012
  • offline last seen 5 hours ago

Mystical Rainboom


You may know of my power, but you may never know my limits- ?????

E
Source

An alternate universe, where almost everything is a robot and Twi-3000 must stop the Nightmare 300 from taking over Equestria.

Twi-3000 must now find the magic of friendship and the Elements of Harmony along with the the correct symbols of them.

Will Twi-300 be able to save Motherboard Celestia or will she waste her time with the nutty robots of Equestria?

(A slight parody of episode 1 and 2 with robots)

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 8 )

That was... certainly a reminder to me that there still can be things in life that one does not expect. I thank you for the reality check.

FOOLS! You may have killed my monitor, but I HAVE MORE! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! (as I laugh an uncontrolled current of electricity can be seen behind me, extending from the sky to the ground.) All bots began to withdraw from engaging me when they realized I fave access to their internal fdisk commands.

OK, with those cheesy jokes out of the way, I have a few constructive criticisms to give:

"I am arranging a surprise present for Moon-500's celebration in many ours." Spike-Bot replied. "Are you not joining?"

I think you mean "hours", not "ours". "Ours" is the opposite of "yours".

Several robots were going about there day.

I think you mean "their day", since "there" is a place ("Hey, look at that over there").

Rather than opem up her sympathy file for Twi, Flutter took note of Spike.

I assume this spelling error is obvious enough that I don't have to spell it out (pun intended).

Also, I doubt robots have mainframes. A mainframe is a fairly large thing, so I doubt it would be portable enough to be in a moving pony-robot. That's my two cents on the subject.

Also, I LOL'd harder than I probably should have at the mention of "Apple Products."

7237567 Your constructive criticism is appreciated.

Many times the keyboards I'm using will harass me on unique words and never alert me about a mistake. The homonym errors sometimes slip in with the others too.

As far as mainframes and such go, I used a bit of what I knew of robotics and used it without 100% accuracy on every factor.

Thank you for your kind words and puns.

7470477 Thank goodness. I was hoping someone would get that.

She was always researching whatever Motherboard Celestia sent to her.

preview.ibb.co/j1bGGa/motherboard_celestia.png
When I read that line I just had to pause and make this xD

[...] large and strong red stallion unit, a small yellow filly, and a calculator.

Pff.. Hahaha :rainbowlaugh:

But seriously, it's an interesting concept, but it's just too short and quick, especially after meeting Rainbow. I'd love to see a longer, more detailed version of this story. Plus, there would be more place for puns and other comedy, which in my opinion was pretty good. Other than that, just some minor spelling and inconsistency (Celestia is called a princess near the beginning).
Have a like anyway!

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