Chapter 1
I was wandering around my old google documents while working on my fic Afterlife and ran across a few random stories I had written back in the day for fun. I decided I might as well post a few of the completed ones and see if anypony liked them. Enjoy!
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Trixie fumed as she made her way through the forest. She had suffered significant losses. She had lost her caravan, and most of her bits. None of these things were significant to the Great and Powerful Trixie. She could obviously make all of that back with the ease lesser creatures breathed with. The Great and Powerful Trixie had however lost face. That she could not regain so easily.
Trixie easily avoided the so called ‘dangers’ of the woods. The creatures here were obviously afraid of the blue leaves, the repulsion of which her Great and Powerful self was of course immune to. She made her way towards a small house in the distance. It seemed that the rumors of these woods being completely uncivilized were exaggerated. Which was good as she needed a break on her way to Canterlot.
Trixie brought her Great and Powerful hoof up to lightly rap against the door. Then gasped at the beautiful pony who answered the door. She was light blue with a flowing silver mane and the cutest little cocky smirk. In fact she looked stunningly similar to her Great and Powerful self.
“Welcome guest, forgive my surprise, few Ponyfolk come before my eyes.” the Great and Powerful owner of the little hut told Trixie.
“It is I the Great and Powerful Trixie. I must say I’m charmed to meet a pony with your obvious class this deep in the woods.”
Zecora blushed, completely unused to flattery, especially from ponies. “Come inside my welcome guest, I am happy for the reprieve from loneliness.”
Trixie walked into the house and was further impressed with her Everfree Doppelganger. From the massive collection of chemicals, herbs, and arcane looking masks it was obvious that here was a magician to rival even her own great knowledge and might.
“I offer soup, there is plenty to share, with such a charming unicorn mare.” Trixie was becoming increasingly aware that this beautiful unicorn was taking note of her Great and Powerful self. As a student of the stage she knew how to control her body language well. She made certain to accentuate her movements in Great and Powerful ways as she leaned over her soup, exposing her flank to the owner of the hut. She found the dramatic way her new friend rhymed to be intriguing and add a sense of mystique to her.
“Thank you for your generosity, you too are charming, and gorgeous, and a talented cook, and yet you still haven’t told Trixie your name.”
“My name is Zecora, my flattering friend. I am pleased to have such company near the day’s end.” Trixie was getting to the bottom of her soup. “If you would like to stay the night, I could set you a bed, it would be quite alright.”
“Oh Zecora, I would love to stay the night.” Trixie said, “but I don’t think the extra bed will be necessary.” The Great and Powerful Trixie leaped upon her beautiful new friend, surprised that she seemed much bigger than Trixie had anticipated. “So forward! Yet I find I am not displeased, the everfree can be cold, we should be at ease.” The Great and Powerful tongues of the two mares met, followed by many other Great and Powerful parts. Trixie found herself quite warm that night.
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The next morning the Great and Powerful Trixie woke up without Zecora. This worried her. She was more greatly and powerfully happy last night than she had ever remembered being. She had found a Great and Powerful companion worthy of her, with mystery, respect, and a greatness all of her own.
Of course the Great and Powerful Trixie had had numerous intimate encounters with mares int he past. Her greatness attracted many to her, but few were truly satisfying in the way Zecora had been. She got up, preparing to look for her companion when a sudden blue blur entered the hut.
“Zecora!” The beautiful flying mare announced. “ZECORA!” Trixie lustfully announced, tackling her doppleganger to the ground. Trixie was excited, she had never met a unicorn who could fly before! She had found herself a Great and Powerful mate indeed.
“Uggh what the hay are YOU doing here Trixie!” Her lookalike asked with disgust, “here to try to humiliate everypony with your cheap tricks again? Well I’m ready for you this time I’.....” Trixie couldn’t hear the rest as it was drowned out by the sound of her Great and Powerful heart crushing. How could this beautiful mare feel humiliated about her? How could she call the Great and Powerful Trixie cheap.
“Why are you ashamed of The Great and Powerful Trixie?! Is it something you heard from in Ponyville? We are too beautiful to concern ourselves with such hearsay, We BELONG TOGETHER!” The Great and Powerful Trixie threw herself at her lovely lookalike.
“Well I AM pretty hot.” Her lookalike informed her unnecessarily from beneath her. “But I think you may be a little too crazy for me Trixie.”
Trixie was confused by the beautiful blue pony beneath her, but knew what her body wanted! She tried to kiss her only to be interrupted as the door to the hut opened once again. “Trixie I cannot believe my eyes! Were your words of my beauty nothing but lies!” Zecora announced. Trixie's eyes bogged nearly out of her head as she turned to look at the mare who had just entered the hut. There were three beautiful ponies who looked exactly like her standing in the hut.
The lookalike that had just walked in began to cry as the one beneath her bucked her off of her and out the door. Trixie found herself in the dirt outside of the hut. Her Great and Powerful mind had made a grave mistake! Her two lookalikes trotted out the door past her, giving her icy looks as she lay in the dirt.
She lay stunned by this turn of events for a few minutes before her Great and Powerful emotional recovery facilities kicked in. She HAD to chase after those beautiful mares. She HAD to apologize to the Great and Powerful Zecora.
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The Great and Powerful Trixie tracked her beautiful prey to a familiar town, Ponyville. She shuddered at the thought of entering the place where she had lost so much face. She knew however, that she would have to. She didn’t have to be obvious about it though. She skirted the edge of town looking for signs of her Great and Powerful lookalikes and was shocked at how quickly she found them, AND at what they were doing.
Her great and powerful lookalikes were sitting on a park bench kissing eachother! One of them was sitting in the strangest manner, legs hanging over the edge of the bench while the other lay more naturally across one of her legs. They saw her Great and Powerful approach and blushed, cutting their kiss off.
“So you left the Great and Powerful Trixie only to get together with her for yourself!” Trixie announced to the pony who must be Zecora.
“Lyra! You told me I was your first fillyfriend!” The naturally laying pony announced. “What is this about!”
“I don’t know Bon-bon, I think this mare is crazy.”
“Oh you think she’s CRAZY do you” Bon-bon said while rising into a threatening posture. “Crazy like that mare from Canterlot perhaps...” Lyra gulped, then immediately got up and ran, Bon-Bon in hot pursuit. Trixie scratched her Great and Powerful mane in confusion, then pursued the two ponies.
Their Great and sexy flanks disappeared around a corner, but she spotted the building they must have disappeared into quickly afterwords. It was a graceful white building obviously owned by somepony with Great and Powerful Fashion sense.
Bursting in the door she saw her. She was dressed in an elegant purple pony gown. “Welcome to Carousel Boutique, I trust you are here for business and we won’t be having any... problems. I guarantee we sell gowns that are perfect for the stage to actors who want to make truly classy performances. I am generous enough to give a chance at redemption, to those willing to apologize for their barbaric behaviors in the past.”
Her impossibly fast dressing counterpart was eying her expectantly. “The Great and Powerful Trixie apologizes for offending you. It was an honest mistake and Trixie was confused by her Great and Awesome Beauty.”
The gowned pony looked taken aback. “Well you are forgiven dear. The flattery was a nice touch as well. Lets see if I can find you some proper attire now, I know you are attached to the colour purple, but I think a nice white would...” Trixie was confused, she was forgiven but Zecora was still not speaking in her familiar rhymes. Besides, there was nothing wrong with Trixie’s Great and Powerful Cloak.
Trixie’s confusion was interrupted for the third time today by an opening door. “Hello Rarit... Trixie! What are YOU doing here?”
Trixie knew that any lesser pony would be overwhelmed by such a situation but she kept her Great and Powerful calm. Something was definitely wrong, this was a different pony. This pony looked like her Great and Powerful self, knew her, and was definitely not Zecora, neither of the ponies in the room were.
It appeared Ponyville had been over-run by Great and Powerful clones.
Trixie always suspected somepony might try to make copies of her Great and Powerful form. Trixie had in fact fantasized about this in the past. Now it had finally happened. Her clones must be confused, and it was up to her to help ease their confusion. A Great and Powerful smile came to her face.
Then the door slammed open again “TRIXIE!” Yelled a flying clone. It tackled her to the ground. “Don’t you realize you made Zecora cry! I know I’m too awesome to resist but you need to show some loyalty and apologize to her right now!” A second clone was trotting slowly through the door with puffy eyes as a clone dragging a sixth clone by the ear came into the boutique behind it.
Clone #2 who had come into the shop after her spoke up. “WHAT IN EQUESTRIA IS GOING ON HERE!”
The various other clones began making rushed explanations yelling to be heard over the others for almost a minute before Clone #2 Yelled “QUIET!” at which point every voice but one was quiet. The one voice un-noticed until now continued “.... and then I heard all sorts of yelling and figured somepony had messed up the party and decided I had to come help after all!”
“Pinkie Pie? When did you get here?” Clone #2 asked the only pony in the room that was not a clone of Trixie. Trixie vaguely remembered her brilliant pink coat from her audience. “Arrg, nevermind. Trixie, you have some explaining to do!”
Trixie stood up, tears coming to her eyes from the beauty of the scene before her. Six clones of herself to do with as she wished! The universe was finally giving her her due!
“I know you have all been confused by the events of the past couple of days. I am sorry that it took this long for my amazing mind to see how beautiful and special you all are to me.” The faces of every clone in the room took on confused and concerned expressions. Pinkie Pie started eating popcorn “Awww” she said. “Zecora, I’m sorry I mistook our flying sister for you. Bon-bon and Lyra I’m sorry I confused your Great and Powerful relationship. But now that we are all here together, we should never be apart again! our great and powerful group will take the world by storm! Together we will be the greatest performers ever seen by pony eyes! And we will all love each other as the closest of friends”
Trixie gave Clone #2 a Great and Powerful hug, closing her eyes with joy. She began to feel a little woozy and rested her weight on her copy a little. “Um Trixie, as great as it is that you are trying to embrace the magic of friendship...” Trixie opened her eyes and screamed. “YOU!” she yelled backing away from Twilight Sparkle. “You TRICKED the great and powerful Trixie didn’t you!”
“Um what?” Twilight Sparkle asked, completely uncertain as to what was wrong with Trixie now.
“You witch, you disguised yourself as my Great and Powerful self in order to SEDUCE me! There never was a Zecora at all!”
“Befuddled pony Zecora is I, The way you are acting, you must be high. Did you eat some of my herbs? Is that what has made you act so absurd?” Said a Zebra to Trixie’s right. Trixie fainted.
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da fuck is this?
Miiiindfuck...
I was confused, but then I was lolz.
This was...Interesting, to say the least. Wonder why Pinkie wasn't seen as a Trixie clone?
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All my WAT.
Hilarious
Good writing mixed with a lot of sloppiness.
It was fun to read.
I didn't expect Trixie to jump Zecora like that. I was like "Woah, I guess this is a different kind of story than I thought."
726587 the fuck is that
And now we know just how self-centered Trixie really is.
What... did I... just read?
Was this all a fever dream or something?
1 word priceless
Half of me is lolling so hard while the other half is really disappointed at what seems to be a lack of editing and forethought.
Overall, I'll keep up with it but reserve my thumbs.
726587
oh and encrypted-tbn3.google.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcSWag0o2GcTiX_ymQ2y2DHIDHWaga7Vu5g-ag3039IloPU00OcmWg
and first
awesome.
I must say, Poison Joke is such an awesome plant...
WHAT
DA
FUQ
DID
I
JUST
READ!?!?!?!
-Epicpony
i1270.photobucket.com/albums/jj615/RoxxiFoxxiMoxxi/MLPScreenshot.png
727718 That's how it's done
ummm what
denver.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/rsz/mlfw3993_small.jpg
The WTF levels increase over time. I think.
After about five minutes of going "WTF AM I READING?!" I remembered poison joke and saw what you did here. VERY nice
Poison joke, you scary.
Id tap that
yea after reading this my eyes became derpified
>592 veiws
Okay so apparently the random I wrote in google docs last year was worth reading.
And quite confusing.
I didn't take this story seriously enough to feel like editing it. I promise that the stuff I publish on here in the future will be better edited.
Glad so many people enjoyed this.
I must admit I was laughing through most of this story. Very good job here, I give you five Derpys out of five.
I'm more concerned about what broke her out of the Poison Joke state then anything else...
As for Pinkie Pie appearing as herself... Kind of explains itself when you think about it a little.
Whatever the hell just happened was BRILLIANT.
I got about halfway through until the logic filter finally took mine away.
This story was definitly funny. A bit anti-climatic though. I kinda feel like it ends abruptly.
This was hilarious. =3
I was focused for a while but once I remembered the posion joke then it made some more sense. Quite funny
I'll have what she's having!
This was pretty funny and I like the concept, shame it's so short though.
Not sure how many times I had to re-read the first instance of running into Zecora to understand what was going on,but I finally got it.
Stuff like this is why I stay up till 4 in the morning browsing this site.
731242 I DEMAND YOU WRITE A SECOND SHAPTER WHERE THIS IS TAKEN CARE OF YOU CAN'T LEAVE IT`LIKE THIS!!!
P.S Best idea for Trixie Posion Joke ever!!!
903268
Well since you seem to want another chapter I may put it on my list. But I just got a new job and am writing 4 other fics and editing for 1. One of those 4 is for a competition with a deadline, and two of them are of rather large scale.
So... when I get around to it. (such as whenever my new job gives me time off, seeing as I am working literally all weekend-2x24 hour shifts and quite a large portion of the week.)
Again, I love to hear how much you enjoyed it.
906844 take all the time you need as long as it will happen someday! =D
The description says it all. So Poison Joke messes with your mind, and that's why Trixie was so confused by all her "clones."
906844 Still waiting. =D
This is great. There needs to be more of it!