Crystal Butterflies

by NovaForce2157

Rarity and Fluttershy's Best Day Ever

Fluttershy trotted through sunny Ponyville, listening to the town’s noises and smelling the fresh summer air. She was headed for the spa for her weekly appointment with Rarity. It was a beautiful day to share with a friend; the sun was spreading warm golden light, and all the flowers in town were in bloom. Perhaps she and Rarity could go out for lunch. At that thought, Fluttershy suddenly found a happiness she couldn’t explain, a warmth that had nothing to do with the sun. She was very happy, and couldn’t wait to get the spa.

“Hello, Fluttershy! Isn’t it a wonderful day?” The ivory unicorn greeted her from outside the shop.

“Oh, yes! It’s simply amazing!” Fluttershy replied, smiling gently at her friend.

“Fluttershy?”

“Yes, Rarity?”

“Why are you blushing?”

The question made Fluttershy blush even more, making her look more like Big Mac than the gentle yellow pegasus she was. “Am I blushing?”

“My dear, I could see you all the way down the street! Is something wrong?” Maybe she shouldn’t have pointed it out. She hated to see her friend embarrassed or upset. What if something horrible had happened, and she was bringing up unwanted memories? What if Fluttershy was simply sunburnt from feeding her outdoor animals, and she had just pointed it out in public? Oh, she should really learn to keep her big mouth shut!

“Oh, no. Everything is just fine!” Fluttershy replied with a smile, her pastel color returning. Just fine. Especially now that I’m spending the day with you…

Fluttershy frowned for a moment. Where had that last thought come from?

Oh dear, she’s frowning and looking thoughtful! Does she even want to be here? Did I interrupt something? She didn’t say anything when we made plans, but you know how shy she is! Stupid Rarity! Silly old fool! You should be more considerate of your friends!

Fluttershy’s frown lasted only a brief moment, and then she smiled again.

“Are we going to go inside, or are we going to stand here like the silly ponies we are?” she asked with a look.

A look that melted Rarity’s insides. Oh, that look! It was so… different of Fluttershy! So… seductive!

No! She scolded herself. It was just Fluttershy’s way of telling her it was a joke. You musn’t think of your friends that way, Rarity!

“Of course!” she replied, holding the door for her yellow friend.

“The usual, please.” Rarity said as she approached the counter.

“Of course, Miss Rarity.” Aloe replied.

---

Fluttershy and Rarity sat in the bath, trying to avoid each other’s eyes.

“So, dear… how are the animals?” Rarity asked trying to make small talk. What a stupid thing to ask. She couldn’t possibly want to talk about her work. Why do I even try?

Fluttershy perked up. “Do you really want to know?”

No. “Of course, dear! I want to know all about your day. You are a good friend, and I want you to be able to tell me anything!”

She really wants to talk to me! She really wants to hear about my day! Fluttershy launched into a detailed description of the day-to-day care of each woodland animal.

Phew. Dodged a bullet there. Rarity thought to herself. I should really try not to be so sappy. Her friendship means a lot to me, but there’s no reason to go overboard telling her about it.

“…and then Angel reminded me that I was supposed to meet with you!” Fluttershy closed.

“That sounds wonderful, dear.” Rarity lied.

As they wore mud masks and got massages, Rarity found herself peeking around her cucumbers. She was looking at that sweet, innocent face. That cute, dainty little smile. Her beautiful little Pegasus wings. Her beautiful cutie mark… that succulent, curvy flank…

No! I must have some sort of restraint! I can’t just go looking around at my friends’… features!
But she wasn’t looking at her friends. She was looking at her friend. THE friend.

Little did Rarity know, Fluttershy was taking peeks of her own.

Rarity had the most beautiful horn. It looked so velvety and smooth. It was centered in her head at just the right place. And her mane! Don’t even get Fluttershy started on her mane! Even her tail was completely beautiful. She had an elegance about her that Fluttershy adored. Her body was curved in all of the right places, there wasn’t a blemish on her, and her pelt was always brushed and well-kempt. There was nothing about Rarity that Fluttershy didn’t like, except perhaps the way that her business forced her to stay secluded for extended periods of time. She missed the marshmallow pony sometimes, and her knowledge of sewing could help Rarity if she would just unlock the door. Perhap they could even have a sleep over or something...

---

The two ponies sat in the sauna. Rarity was determined to keep her eyes shut so as not to tempt herself, but Fluttershy was looking her all over. She admired Rarity’s grace, her poise, her sophisticated beauty. There was nopony quite like Rarity, and Fluttershy was determined to take it all in.

It was now or never.

“Rarity?”

Rarity almost opened her eyes instinctively, but her willpower was too strong. “Yes, Fluttershy?”

“Are you doing anything today? Do you have any dresses to make or anything?”

This sounded suspiciously like…”No, I don’t believe so, why?”

“I was wondering if you wanted to go get a bite to eat.”

Did Fluttershy just ask her… on a date? Rarity was speechless. If she hadn't had years of practice with poise and dignity, her jaw might have dropped through the floor.

Oh no, she’s going to refuse! I moved too quickly! Oh, I should have known no good would come of this when I first decided it would be a good day! Now I’ve ruined our friendship forever! I came on too strong, and now Rarity probably hates me.

“Rarity, I-“

“Fluttershy, I’d love to.”

“You would?” Fluttershy was so shocked, she almost slid right into the hot coals.

“I would. In fact, let’s go now. I think I’ve had enough of this steam.”

“Oh- Okay.”

“And Fluttershy?”

“Yes?”

“You should really cross your legs.” Rarity walked away, smirking.

---

Rarity and Fluttershy walked up to a small bistro in the middle of of town, with a patio surrounded by grape vines. The patio had a small crowd, but the two mares were able to easily get a seat. Fluttershy ordered a strawberry-spinach salad with a Granita, while Rarity had a radish salad with a Margarita.
Rarity watched Fluttershy nibble at her salad. She took such tiny, dainty bites. Almost timid. On the other hand, everything Fluttershy did was timid. Perhaps that was what made her so cute. Maybe it was her soft, gentle voice. Maybe it was a lot of things put together that made Fluttershy so adorable on the outside, and gorgeous on the inside. She took a sip of her Margarita, savoring the lime-y taste. Subconsciously, she began to twirl the cocktail stick around with her tongue. She looked up at Fluttershy, who was staring at her tongue intently, starting to blush.

"Fluttershy dear, what is it?" Rarity asked, although she suspected the answer.

"Oh, um... nothing. I was just, ah.. lost in thought. Sorry." she said, turning very red and looking at the table.

Rarity could always tell when her friend was lying, but decided for both their sakes to let the subject die.

"No need to apologize, dear."

"Oh, sorry."

Rarity fought the urge to facehoof. The two ponies looked at- well, more like around and in the general direction of- each other for a few seconds. Then they both laughed, Fluttershy's color mellowing considerably.
As they ate, they slowly became more and more comfortable with each other; but their eyes were like two like-charged magnets. Their quick glances of eye contact with each other were as fast as the darting away their pupils did.

---

After finishing the meal, which Fluttershy insisted on paying for, they walked back towards the Boutique.

“Today was wonderful, Fluttershy. I really enjoyed myself.” Not too strong, it’s just our first date. Rarity reminded herself.

“Can I walk you home?”

“Oh, um… of course!” What did she have in mind when they got there?

The rest of the walk was fairly quiet, but the two ponies enjoyed the fresh air and sky, which Rainbow Dash had been busy keeping clear of all but just a few fluffy clouds.

When they arrived at the boutique, Fluttershy stopped at the door.

“Well, I’d better get going. I had a lot of fun today. Maybe we could do something again tomorrow?”

What? Already? “Aren’t you going to come inside?” Rarity asked, a touch of longing in her voice. She would have to remember to suppress that if she were to continue their friendship normally.

“Oh, well, I hate to impose, and…” Fluttershy said, bowing her head low and blushing.

“Nonsense! You come inside right now, and have tea with me!” Rarity commanded.

“Well, if you want me to...”

“Of course, I do! You’re always welcome in this shop, anytime day or night!” she paused for a moment. Is this the direction I want to head in? Yes. “In fact, underneath the flowerpot there’s a key. If I’m not home, or I don’t seem to want visitors, you come right ahead in.”

“Oh… okay.”

Rarity ushered her friend into her shop, and sat her down on the couch. She returned a few minutes later with tea.

They slowly and awkwardly sipped at their tea, both pony's hooves shaking considerably. After a few strange minutes, they put their tea down at the same time.

Come on, Fluttershy. This is the best day ever. Don’t screw it up now. All you have to do is say it. It can’t be that hard…

Alright, you stupid unicorn. Try to do something right today. Just tell her.

“Rarity, I-“

“Fluttershy, I-“

“You go first.” They said together.

“No, after you.” They both urged.

“I love you!” they blurted at the same time.

Both ponies were so shocked that they froze and nearly fell over.

Fluttershy was the first to make a move. She reached for Rarity with her hoof, putting it on her shoulder slowly, and suddenly pulling her close.

“Oh Rarity! I was so nervous! I thought you would be angry, or disgusted, or upset! I didn’t even think you liked mares!” she hugged her white unicorn friend, holding her close.
Rarity nibbled her ear and kissed her tenderly on the lips. “Neither did I.” she whispered into her pegasus’s ear.
Fluttershy grabbed Rarity by the back of the head and pulled her in for a kiss. It seemed to last hours, or months. Lips met lips and scents were inhaled. Rarity gently prodded her tongue into the yellow pony’s mouth, and was met with the same reaction. They glided together, sliding and prodding each other. It was like there was an elegant dance in their mouths, slow and sensual. Fluttershy tasted of strawberries and cream, and her scent was flowery, like every nice-smelling plant had spread its scent on her.

Fluttershy thought the same of Rarity. She tasted like roses, and smelled like she had spent the day in Fluttershy’s garden. She could discern lavender, lilac, and tulips. The kiss was wonderful, and Fluttershy was in heaven. She was so happy, in fact, she started to tear up.

“Fluttershy! What’s wrong, dear? Why are you crying?” Rarity was very concerned.What have you done now, you silly pony? I knew I should never have gotten into romance. I'm just not cut out for it, it's a nice thought, but I just can't...

“I’m so happy with you; I just love you so much.” Fluttershy smiled.

Two sets of sparkly blue eyes met each other, radiating love and devotion at each other.

And Rarity started to cry.

“I love you more than you can possibly imagine, you wonderful Pegasus!” She leaned in and started another kiss, filled with slow passion.

They held each other for a long time, crying and kissing in a tight embrace.

Rarity glanced at the window and realised that it was getting dark. “Fluttershy, would you spend the night?”

“Oh, I couldn’t. I have to feed my animals, and-“ Rarity interrupted her with a kiss.

“Oh. Well, I suppose Angel could take care of it.” She said, smiling.

Comments

[Gabriel LaVedier]

Ahhh Flarity. Beautifu. Some minor issues with grammar and spelling, but nothing a quick polish-job won't fix.

[BrainLapse]

A good idea, but you push the story too fast. I can understand skipping scenes to build more tension and to make the emotional parts really get to your readers, but you also need to set up the scene. Instead of just saying 'they walked up to a restaurant', say something like 'they walked up to a small bistro in the middle of of town, with a patio surrounded by grape vines. The patio had a small crowd, but the two mares were able to easily get a seat.' I did enjoy the fact that you mentioned exactly what Rarity and Fluttershy had to eat, but then it is as if the food no longer exisists.

Another thing about slowing down is the ability to really expand on what the characters are feeling.you kinda skip from friendship to attracted to love in the course of a few hours. Instead of just having the feelings show up, show the reactions and the realizations that both of them have when they reach the conclusion that they have fallen for one of their friends.

Overall, I see much potential for this story, but it needs to see the fine tooth comb of a few prereaders. I'll keep an eye one this story to see how you change and develop things. Also sorry about this wall of text, I'm a bit long winded.

[NovaForce2157]

715062 Crap. I always feel like I get bogged down when I write, so I tried to get to the point on this one. I didn't realise how much I had affected the storytelling. Now that I read your comment, I think you're absolutely right. Time for revision 2. Not a bad story for 4 hours of work early in the morning, though.

[NovaForce2157]

715062 I've made some fixes, but nothing too revolutionary. Do you mind if I use your exact quote for the restaurant scene? It was exactly what I was picturing when I wrote this!

[NovaForce2157]

714674 Could you point out some specific errors? I ran it through Microsoft Word and didn't find anything, but everyone knows how weird and finicky that program's grammar check is. I couldn't stand to have an imperfect story because of something so stupid and trivial, and I can't catch grammar in my own work to save my life (I probably know exactly what I mean, so I unintentionally auto-correct it as I read it).

[BrainLapse]

716316
Hey man, no worries. Believe me, I've had to work hard to get over the need to rush through the scenes. And feel free to use the restaurant line, I have no real attachment to it. If ya have any other questions, feel free to ask me.

[Gabriel LaVedier]

First thing that leaped out was the missing capitalization on "the" in Rarity's description near the start. I'm on my phone so going back and forth is difficult.

What also struck me was that the italicized internal asides couldn't keep focus, they were both omniescent and personal.

[NovaForce2157]

717509 Fixed the "the" thing. I understand what you mean by the italics. The "I's were supposed to indicate that the character was... idunno, sort of talking to themselves in their head? The rest was just supposed to be their loose thoughts, not really directed anywhere. I get confused re-reading it myself, and I'm the one that wrote it! I'm still looking for a way to make the internal asides clearer, so bear with me. For now, though, I'm just going to assume that everyone can see what I'm trying to (badly) communicate. Thanks for letting me know it was confusing, though. I originally wasn't going to fix it. I appreciate the help!

[Gabriel LaVedier]

720798
My pleasure. I love a good Flarity and I want to see them looking beautiful.

[Bearded_Monkey]

I have to stop reading incomplete work, I always get upset when I find that there is no end yet. Still a great story so far, I can't wait to read more.

[NovaForce2157]

722775 Guess what. You're special. I was originally going to leave the story as it was and re-tag it "Complete". But specifically because you left that comment, I'll write more. Working on a more 'epic' story at the moment, but it's going to be pretty long, so I'll probably take a break and add on to this. You can definitely count on more Rarishy in the next story, though, so don't be upset if I end this one sooner than you had hoped. (There will be PinkieDash, OctaveScratch, and Lyra/Bon-Bon in it too, for future reference.)

[Bearded_Monkey]

723009 I appreciate your decision to write more, you can take all the time you need to add on to this, maybe when you can't add on to your other story. I'll have to read that one also!

[NovaForce2157]

723114 I can't say much about it yet, but I can say that it's a Lord of the Rings style adventure featuring the Mane 6, Vinyl Scratch, Octavia, Lyra, Bon-Bon, Derpy, Cadence, and all 3 major villains. The first chapter should be up by Monday, but I can't promise that it will be good enough to read until Tuesday or Wednesday. I like to make corrections based on suggestions from an audience, so I can't promise it will be perfect. I'm really excited about the idea, though!