Dawn of the Fourth Day - Epilogue
The Old Warhorse
I don’t know where I am.
It doesn’t matter, really. One place is as good as another at this point. Any patch of land or water can serve as a shallow grave in a pinch. There’s good, muddy earth under my back and I can taste the sea on the breeze. Leaves rustle at the corners of my vision, and all the world is the starry night.
Before I can die, though, light touches the horizon, chasing away the stars, and in a ray that pierces the trees she arrives, fading in as if from a dream.
“All I want to know is why, Redbud,” she says, her voice low, hurt.
“For love of you, Celestia, and of this country.”
She lowers her head, for once seeming her age in a way she hadn’t since the Bridle first left her brow. To be a part of that pain is to die just a little inside. No mare can be as beautiful as she, as noble and pure.
“You know what has to happen.”
Without really being able to nod, I pull my head up slightly and let it fall in silent acknowledgement.
“It didn’t have to be this way,” she says, almost pleading. “You could have worked with us. The world isn’t as hopeless as you seem to feel. Think of everything you’ve seen in the past few days. Can’t you see?”
I watch as the sky continues to brighten. Birds wing boldly overhead, wheeling in swirls of bright color before moving on.
“Like the generations of leaves, the lives of mortal men,” I say, my voice barely a whisper. “Now the wind scatters the old leaves across the earth, now the living timber bursts with the new buds and spring comes round again. And so with men: as one generation comes to life, another dies away.”
She steps forward, her eyes questioning.
“It’s from the Iliad,” I say. “I was thinking about the boy. Marcus.”
“What of him?” She settles beside me. “A brave and heroic young man, to be sure, but why do you think of him in such a way?”
“No man. Not anymore.” I sigh and close my eyes. “Him, and Wave Form, and your students, and so many others. The old clears away, so that the new might meet the sun and thrive. They will protect the world, where I could not. I’m too prejudiced, too hateful and cruel. Too covered in blood. You need them, Celestia.”
Her wing settles around me and she pulls me up against her barrel.
“Yes, I do…” She brushes at my side. “Maybe it’s not too late for you.”
“Eternal optimism, my Princess.”
Green light fills the clearing, and Daphne Ocean steps out, coming to my opposite side.
“Where will you take him?” Celestia asks.
“Away. He will learn, or he won’t.” Daphne smiles sadly. “Even I can’t see that. But he at least has a chance.”
Celestia nods and looks back to me. “Whether you like it or not, Redbud – Helios – you’re part of that world, too. Maybe as a mortal you had nowhere left to grow, but as an alicorn you can be young again. You can change. Come back to me, if you do.”
I don’t answer. I can’t answer. What could I say to convince her to let me die?
Nothing. She’s Celestia.
She never quits on her little ponies.
“All right.” Celestia nods, stepping aside. “Take him.”
Green light swallows me, tunneling through space. I glimpse the Tree, a radiant bole of light supporting a canopy of stars and rooted in the black ocean of the tabula rasa.
I don’t know where I’m going, but as I close my eyes and wait, I see Marcus again. For just a moment, I remember what it’s like to be young, to know in your heart that you can do anything.
He even thought he could save me. He pleaded with me to see his way, right to the end.
What happens to me doesn’t really matter. All that does matter is that the world I leave behind has someone who can do what I couldn’t, that it has a whole class of people who can do what I thought was impossible, all because I didn’t have it in me anymore to believe.
They can change the world.
THE END
Also LikedSimilarAuthor
- Ether Echoes · 23k words · 92 14 · 1.4k views
- Ether Echoes · 49k words · 142 12 · 2.9k views
- Jay911 · 62k words · 90 4 · 1.7k views
- Starscribe · 14k words · 249 9 · 4.1k views
- Flick Mare · 5.5k words · 51 4 · 1.3k views
- Ether Echoes · 30k words · 156 12 · 4.9k views
- McPoodle · 22k words · 49 13 · 962 views
Stats
Page generated in 0.12 seconds
Total duration
1,040 users online
1,985,416 hits today, 2,280,440 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
This was a freaking great story.
That this story was ending caught me a bit off-guard. I expected it to be one like Pirene in terms of length. Despite that, I quite enjoyed the words you've had to say in this tale, and for that I thank you. I wish you nothing but the best in your future endeavors.
See you on the other side!
6754626
I know!
6754639
Hahahaha dear gods.
The title was Three Nights in Manehattan, not A Season in Manehattan
6754666
6754771
I knooow, it's so sad!
So are you done done with this universe or just this story?
6754894
With fanfiction in general. It no longer serves my needs.
God dammit. That one god damned tear had to escape didn't it.
.
I am sad -okay, a little bit depressed- to know that I'll never read more Pirenhe, if happy that I could read it in the first place. This story is one of those that can't ever have a really fitting ending.
I dunno, congratulations for writing such a fine story, best of lucks in any future endeavor, and know that if you write anything else I'll read it. Now I just need you to give up your real life identity to stalk you forever
6754978
Aww, that's too much.
It's a shame this story didn't get as much traffic as Pirene, and sad to see you leaving fanfiction in general. Still, thank you for both stories.
6754057
6754122
The thing I like the most about Pirene is that it banishes the escapism-only element of the show (which is for kids) and presents in a more poignant emotionally diverse fashion.
The past is meant to be epic, it's meant to be mythic. In that respect it's meant to be a lot more Lord of the Rings than it is meant to be Twilight Sparkle befriending the villain in four minutes or less.
The death of Pallas and her daughters is also a reference to mythology, because her soul is trapped in an alicorn amulet afterwards, which is almost a callback to Athena defeating the titan Pallas in Greek mythology, and then using his skin to make her shield.
Pallas is a female in this, because many of the titans, like Pallas and Typhon, are meant to be alicorns that were demonized by humanity during The War.
They also switched their genders around due to both divine figures being less than lady-like, and as a form of insult to them both, these tactics echoed down into the stories in our own mythology today.
Okay, now it's time to write the next epic. Hop to. Dance, monkey!
I wish you great fortune on your journey through life. I'll miss the edge of my seat. I have been there from the first word you published and the two of us have gotten well acquainted during all this time. You may be retiring from fanfiction, but at the least, you gave us a treasure to look upon that will hopefully far outlast you. The thing about dreams, like the one you showed us, is that they don't end, they just fade into the background for a while. I hope that if/when it resurfaces in your head you somehow feel like typing it up to show us another glimpse at what's going on in the lives of the characters we have grown close to. I still want to know what happened with the kitty.
Loved both this story and the original. I just wish I had read Through the Well of Pirene when I first saw it rsther than letting it sit on my read it later list for several months. I'm just getting to know you as an author, but you're already moving on.
6755945
Firebird, I've been devouring your comments for a long time, and I will miss you and many others. I wish I could just write and write Pirene and make the big bucks off it, but alas Hasbro won't let me. I need to seize my dream as a writer somehow.
Still! I do love these characters and this setting a lot. In fact I run a weekly Scion game set in it with my sister and some close friends, because to me it never does and can never die.
I can tell you all sorts of things about it that could never appear in the pages of the novels, and would indeed enjoy doing so.
This was an amazing story I I look forward too if more from this universe is written ltater on.
I actually liked Pirene better than this one (not to say this wasn't good!), but that may be an issue of genre; the two are very different stories.
aw.... it's over. it was great while it lasted.
to be honest, the epic anime-style final battle wasn't quite my thing. a little too over-the-top, heh. but I adore the characters so much, and that's what I'll always remember. even your characters from a little side-story deserve their own spinoff!
like I noticed from reading Pirene and Perchance, you have an amazing talent at introducing original characters that are not just interesting, but endearing. if you keep that up, I think you could make anything successful.
Seeing a story end is always a double edged sword.
On the one hand... it ended.
On the other, seeing a story actually get an ending is a rare thing.
Really loved this story.
Trace was a great character, and even as a new character introduced to an already huge story she easily held her own.
Seeing Marcus' story get some closure (since Pirene really wasn't his story, and he was probably more important there for his effect on other characters than for himself) was brilliant, and I loved the way his character arc interwove with Trace's.
What happened to Redbud's possession by the alicorn amulet at the end though? Is he still Redbud, or is he Helios? Or both?
Anyway, best of luck with your future work.
6756317
I wouldn't call it anime anymore than the show's big fight scenes are.
The real word I'd pick would be mythic, because we're moving into the realm of demigods.
6756453
Redbud and Helios are the same person now.
6756453
In Pirene there are nine alicorn amulets rather than one, and each of them contains the soul of a different alicorn imprisoned during the war. If it helps to simplify it, consider the soulstones in the Diablo series.
Although the majority of their soul is contained within the amulet, Pirene uses something closer to the Egyptian or Mayan understanding of the soul, which is that they contain various parts. In the case of the alicorn amulets, pieces of their soul or spirit do escape and move on, reincarnating. The human or pony they happen to reincarnate to will always be missing those other pieces of themselves, and fate has a way of drawing them together.
Once the individual is reunited with the amulet, their souls are rejoined. That said, the entirety of the soul is contained in the amulet rather than their own body, until such a time as they manage to break free completely.
Damn. That was a really great read, and I like many others am saddened to see you depart, even if for greener pastures.
I also have to say, Redbud/Helios' bit at the end really resonates for me. The feeling of being unable to talk others into, well...'getting it', just seeing them trying to help you even though you know it'll do nothing. I wish I could at least have his hope for the world at large.
We'll miss you, Ether Echoes. Will you let us know with a blog post when your next story goes live, wherever that may be?
6799126
I will.
6808425
Oh? What questions do you have?
I don't know how to explain it. I guess I just like it when things are neatly spelled out, as opposed to left mysterious. It definitely feels very mysterious, alluding to things and then never really going into detail.
Maybe it's in there somewhere and I missed it, but the history of 'Earth' and Equestria in this AU keeps being hinted at and never addressed. I might need to re-read Pirene, but I'm not sure there is ever a straightforward explanation of what the Bridle is/was and how it was created and so on. The whole Titans and titanspawn thing too. It's like you're trying to tie this to Greek/Roman mythology, but there's some kind of twist and I'm not sure where/what the connections are. If there was some real ancient history that someone actually knew (been there and so on), I'd probably want to know all about it, not just whatever they deemed relevant to the present time. The goblins also kinda scream cross-over even if it's with some original idea. Perhaps I am judgmental, but any number of people/stories seem to throw together disparate things (wish I could list some off the top of my head). I don't write enough to really argue that they do a bad job, but the more stuff the reader has to know about to grasp the use of it, the less sense things make.
I'm also wondering how the 'alicorn' formed out of (living?) metal ended up in jars. It sounds like she was created at some point and then destroyed/dismantled and sealed into separate containers?
TL;DR
Allusions and mystery are interesting in the story, but I like details... :)
P.S.
When you say 'last story here' what do you mean? Lots of people says things like that and it's frequently unclear whether it's a 'never again', just a 'not working on pony stuff right now', a permanent departure from MLP fanfiction or they think that what they've written isn't worth much because it's fanfiction.
6808601
The Bridle is an artifact created to grant mankind dominion over the other races by the Adversary.
The titans are the original creators of the universe, who predate the gods.
Note that named titans are actually alicorns, such as Rhea or Cronus or Helios.
Following the Adversary's defeat she was hunted down and broken.
The way I read it the Bridle only worked on ponies and was most specifically a threat to Celestia and Alicorns since it allowed one to suborn them and force them to do what the user wished. For any other pony, it would be simply be criminal mind-control, not possible universe destruction. And it felt like there was some connection to Bellerophon and Pegasus and the golden bridle (a quick read of wiki strengthens that view since it mentions the 'well of Pirene'). It's a little unclear why mankind would need dominion over something, since we have unintelligent/unsentient animals. It's strange therefore to imply that the pony races once existed on Earth, and the whole goblin ways between worlds stuff smacks of something a bit more complicated than one world becoming two.
Is the 'Adversary' one of the titans or something else? It's also very confusing for it to be:
Titans are Alicorns, but not all Alicorns are Titans. It like saying that All squares are rectangles, but not all rectangles are squares, only worse. In light of all that, what the heck is Discord and what are draconequi (if there is even more than one)?
Further the titanspawn are intimated as being as chaos who can be destroyed by 'blasts of Harmony' and yet presumable the TItans are not generally chaotic since creation can be considered a form of ordering.
---
It's also somewhat unclear what powers/role/position Daphne, Amelia, etc have over Equestria and how they compare to Celestia, Luna, et alii. The whole goblin magic thing doesn't seem to fit with the thread of the story. Where did they come from and why does their magic even work in Equestria...
P.S.
It's probably overdoing it to get into a long back and forth here. Feel free to PM replies if you feel the need/desire to reply and don't wish to clog this story's comment thread. I can't decide if I should spoiler anything. It seems fair, if no guarantee, that people reading this read the story before it.
6808641
It doesn't result in universe destruction.
Correct, Pegasus (who has a different name) was mentioned as the first Bridled, the son of Pirene, a first age alicorn.
Bellerophon was the person who bridled him.
Not before the Bridle there wasn't.
Not only did the pony races exist on Earth, but Equestria was physically a part of Earth before the split.
The goblins are mortals who survived in the Ways.
He's a god. Dominion of Man over nature should be hint enough.
The named titans from Greek mythology are not titans in Pirene. The titans in Pirene are world-creating monsters of ineffable nature.
A class of Titanspawn.
The gods ordered Creation from under the tyranny of the Titans.
Order is defined as adherence to objective laws, Chaos as adherence to personal whim.
Amelia has no control, role, or position within Equestria. She is the King of the Wand Goblins and occupies a palace in Mag Mell from which she interacts with her court and the city officials. Her relation to Equestria is diplomatic.
Daphne is Aquarius, the arbiter of the Age for the next two thousand odd years - that was all covered in the first book. The Green Star is the manifestation of her presence and allows her to observe events occurring far from her physical location, as shown here.
They are both alicorns of lesser stature than Celestia and Luna, though with their own little niches, since Amelia has the Wand and Daphne is Aquarius.
All magic works universally unless based on the whim of a titan.
Goblin magic was explained in Pirene thoroughly.
Thanks.
The problem I have with this, if it can be called a problem at all, is that it conflicts with real earth history. There could be a whole prequel to explain that. It's exceedingly unclear whether humans had magical powers before or not and so on. The use of an existing paradigm/setting/? brings with basic assumptions of the reader and I think more work is needed to distinguish the Earth of the story and the world as we know it as drawing parallels between the two is partially responsible for confusion.
Not what I was getting at all. The issue I am having is what makes them different than other alicorns, except age? Celestia isn't Rhea's equal, but where does the distinction lie?
Clearly Discord must be orders of magnitude more powerful than the garden variety and not quite as chaotic if he's not been annihilated yet.
What makes one alicorn have more or less stature than other is a unexplained point. Any natural inferences about Celestia would come from canon and thus be potentially incorrect. Are there umpteen alicorns on earth that don't affect Equestria because they aren't presently there?
Seems like I need to re-read Pirene, although I doubt I'd find any answers.
6808734
Real earth history is accurate enough for the last 4000 years. Before that, the divine conflict that was the Bridle War is a true apocalypse of breathtaking scope that left its impact on more than just the physical environment.
There could be, yes.
They did, yes.
I think most folks don't really have a huge problem processing it is the thing.
If we took Rhea at her death and Celestia at her current point, we'd compare them thusly:
Rhea predates the ordered universe. This also counts as exceeding her in age and experience.
Rhea's access to relics and spells was far, far greater than Celestia's.
Discord is definitely leagues above a garden variety titanspawn.
Alicorns come in three stages:
Spark, when you have ichor but it isn't manifested visibly.
Second race, where you add a second race to your first.
Fully realized, where you gain all three races and become greater than the sum of your parts.
Luna, Celestia (and by extension Amelia and Morgan) are fully realized; Daphne, the Mane 6, Cadance during the show, are all second stage; Wave Form is a spark.
An alicorn is an equine demigod, so no. That'd be like suggesting there's an army of superheroes wandering around.
There are quite a few humans-with-equine-souls due to the fallout of the Bridle War, those who became human to survive it and passed on the quality in illimitable fashion to select distant descendants, and those of other races.
~
Here's really the key defining fact of the Pirene universe:
In the beginning the world was without form, and void
Into the void arose the beings of Chaos, and in them they created worlds and peoples
Those peoples rebelled, and in simultaneous, yet distinct, action created the Universe with a Word.
That Universe was a place of laws where the Titans were bound to generate the laws regardless of whim, and each group of gods discovered one another. These were the many families that we know today as pantheons - and many we've forgotten, chased to other worlds as they are.
Again you've left me rather speechless, I'm left saddened knowing that this is the end but hopeful that even though this is the end of your fanfiction it may not be the end of your writing career. I Might just have to start putting a bit of money a side so one day I can get my hands on what comes next, whatever it may be.
6841957
Believe me, if I could get traditional-published this way I would still be writing it. Thanks for all of your kind words~
6842252 I'd definitely pay for a ebook from you, either set in this wonderful world you created or something new, I've really enjoyed the amount of thought you've put into your characters and the just how natural they progress.
I feel that you have a excellent grasp on writing, your pacing in both this and the Well was impeccable I never felt bored or like I wanted a chapter to end, your characterisation of both cannon and original characters was and is amazing. It's definitely one of your strong points, along with the wonderful worlds you created. It's crazy how alive everything feels, I felt the thrum of the busy marketplace as Amelia hawked her wares, honestly a stunning job. You managed to create this amazing framework that let my imagination go wild, including just enough detail, creating these wonderful places in my mind, yet not stifling my thoughts, it was always the right amount of detail.
Some authors strength is their characters others the worlds they create, for you I have to say it's how well you mesh them together, your worlds influence and change the lives of your characters yet they in return change your worlds, exploring and shaping them.
You really could write original fiction set in this world though, I suppose it's just a pipe dream but over these past few days I've fallen in love with your world and I just wish this wasn't the end.
6842349
I dunno about that. In talks with friends, there may be some salvaging of the setting that could be done.
There's a different cast of characters, no Equestria, but I think it could all work out very nicely. Could even fix some of my lingering issues.
6842543 Well I'd love to read it if it ever happens, your world has hooked me.
Where Well of Pirene was fascinating, this story was intriguing. All these hints at the larger world, and how it is changing, but a focus entirely on this small section of the world. Stories untold, but the results of which are shown.
And the hardboiled cop pony doesn't hurt, either
6870907
6932421
Hah! If you ever saw a picture of me, you'd know in an instant that I had never served in any of the armed forces.
No, I have passable familiarity with a variety of subjects; enough to know the gist of an answer, and what to look up in order to do spot research. In this case, the thought "I'm pretty sure the Marines work with the Air Force just like they do the Navy," a few minutes of Google, and then a completed comment.
The "passing familiarity" bit is built up over time. It could be from reading the news, from a tangent of a previous bit of spot research (I didn't know about the AEWs before making that comment, for example), whatever. Even TV shows that put forth effort to do their research helps, at least when it comes to knowing what to look for.
An example of the latter for this particular case would be Stargate SG-1: the SGC is a USAF Command, and yet 3 of the SG teams are explicitly Marines. SG-1 got to use footage from the actual Chyenne Mountain complex, the Air Force had people reading every episode script for mistakes and had an adviser to get costume, makeup, behavior, etc. correct. The Air Force flew several fighter jets to Vancouver to be used in several episodes, and a bunch of the extras are actual USAF personnel. General Michael Ryan and General John Jumper both appeared as themselves while serving as the CSAF in the show, too.
That is what placed Pirene in my Top Five All-Time Favorites. And this one was right up there. Outstanding story. Truly, one of the best this site has to offer.
Truly, it is a sad thing to see that there will be no more of your works here, but it is also understandable that you should follow your own path, ang I'm certain that you'll grow into something even greater than that you are already.
Still looking forward to the day my copy of Pirene gets here.
6943537
6946238
6987045
I'm really glad you liked it. In a way this was an experimental novel, because it takes what is essentially a side story after a big, epic novel and asks people to appreciate it on the same level.
Any detailed thoughts you'd like to share?
6987970 lol that requires me having a functional brain... nearly 2am... i can't brain right now
6988226
Brain no worky
7088305 Reading the new epilogue to Pirene right now...
Almost feels like it could be the first chapter of a new story... a sequel, perhaps?
7088322
Honestly it probably could - a character-driven novella answering where people wound up after the events of the first novel.
If only I had the time~
7088332 As I have been telling my brother... MAKE the time. Come hell or high water, his fic will be revived, and I think that this epilogue I am reading deserves to be its own story. And I can think of no one better than you to bring it to life.
And if there is any way I could help you with this, I would be honored to do so.
It is something I feel strongly about, that when a story calls out to be written, it needs to be written.
7088356
Well.
You could write it.
7088452 No, I could not. The reason is, it would not be the same. I might be able to come close... but I would never be able to get it truly right. I do thank you for the vote of confidence in me.
7088478
They erase the memory, but that rarely happens since they pre-vet people.
7088490
The issue with me doing it is that I can't really afford to.