⇩ Please Downvote! ⇩

by Super Trampoline

Thanksgiving Tanka, Ostensibly, But Really More About the Fleeting Nature of Youth, Featuring Pinkie Pie

Hey Ponkers, I said, neglecting quotation marks because God is dead and we have killed him, how are you?

"Doing alright, although I suspect we're about to get philosophical, and while I do appreciate that from time to time, I do have a Thanksgiving Party to be setting up."

"Okay, well, that answers one of my questions," I said, deciding to use quotation marks again because life is too short to get this story taken down again for ignoring the basic rules of grammar, which I feel is a little bit of a double standard considering some of the drek that's on this site, but no matter. Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah, anyway, Ponkers, I invited you here so that I'm not talking to myself, which is always a bit wierd. And yes, I know, you're a fictional character, we don't need to do that bit again. Everyone here is a fictional character, even myself. Yes, behind these words is a human on earth, but this version I portray of myself is a creative fiction. I mean first of all, I'm not really a pony. Pretending I am was one of the reasons I originally got like a three year ban from staffing at BABSCon, although like Everfree Northwest (which unlike BABSCon which had legitimate grieviences with the 2014 version of me, had me temporary banned from staffing for 100% bullshart reasons) but anyway in both cases I would just wander onto staff anyway in a low level role so as to gain access to the staff lounge and thus to free food, and sometimes a free badge. But to be clear I always am a legitimate help on staff and do enjoy helping run conventions. Anyway, where was I with all this. Oh so to put a bow on that story, as of 2019 and 2021 respectively, I'm officially off of both ban lists. Everfree 2019 was actually one of my favorite cons I've done and I'm really glad I went and also playing a 3 a.m. pony piano set on acid on the renegade stage and actually having people show up to watch was a huge highlight for me (Which Wootmaster needs to hurry up and get on YouTube lol). Anyway, the point is that I'm a fictional representation of myself, although perhaps not as much as some folks here, as people who meet me IRL at conventions say I basically have the same energy as I do online and I am pretty much exactly who they expect me to be, which is one of the benefits of having no filter and shartposting on main. Anyway where was I going with all this?

Oh yeah, "Hey Ponkers, you know how I've liked using Izzy Moonbow as a character to interact with in recent chapters?"

"Yes, I've noticed, you've replaced me," Pinkie said, eyes growing wide and watering.

"Wow, Pinkie Pride all over again," I muttered.

"Lol nah I'm over that shart," Pinkie said. "I know now that self-worth comes from within. Also I'm literally married to Cheese Sandwich now (pretend I linked to Aragon's comic about that again lol)."

Anyway, the point this chapter original was going to make was about how it's been so long since we've seen new main characters, it's weird to have new characters to fall in love with, and possibly have a slight crush on Izzy Moonbow, new best pony, but the awkwardness arises from when I watched G5, I generally was around the same age as the main characters themselves, beginning watching them in 2012 when I was 21 and the series ending in 2019 when I was... 27 I think? Anyway, I'm 29 now and currently sort-of-dating (she's aromantic and we haven't defined the relationship yet because I don't want to rush or ruin things and don't have to figure out what we are yet) a 24-year-old and even that feels kind of weird, so now with a new generation of main characters presumably in their low 20s, I'm starting to feel a lecherous creep sexualizing them. wait this is rated everyone can I even be talking about this shart? Like you notice I've been saying shart instead sh[]t like this is The Good Place or something (Oh Fork!). Anyway, oh well, as long as we're all consenting adults, who cares. Wow is this still rated everyone? It better be. Or else I mean, I'll have to go back and edit this. Lol I think that's what I wanted to talk about originally before pivoting to talking about whether Ponies have Thanksgiving, and how they do have an episode with Buffalo which a lot of people don't really like and especially don't like Pinkie in it even though I think her song and appearance as a... euphemism for the type of ladies who would wear what she wears in the old west was really great."

"Thanks, Super," Pinkie said, reminding me she was there and I was talking about her. Anyway that episode has could be seen as an example of early installment wierdness since pony wasn't really planned out more than a season at a time and no one knew it would be such a smash hit and most series aren't planned out multiple seasons in advance, with a few exceptions like Gravity Falls and Avatar: the Last Airbender anyway, wow this chapter is almost a thousand words long I wonder if I should release it as a dumb standalone chapter but rated teen instead of everyone as a cheap excuse to publish another story since the story guidelines are that you can release different-rated versions of the same story. I mean, I have been considering starting a Please Downvote! After Dark for a while now, with the goal of it being the second-most downvoted story, though I don't know whether it would be as much of a hit as the original. Who knows. Anyway, I only have like a dozen words until this reaches a thousand words, and according to the Word Count (estimate): 1,003 • Paragraphs: 9, I'm now there. Anyway, have a wonderful Thanksgiving everypony!

Oh right, the Tanka. The Thanksgiving Tanka. The Tanka for Thanksgiving

Thanksgiving Tanka
I'm thankful for all of you
Who read this dumb tale.
MLP and Internet
Unite us in harmony