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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Shining Armor makes the rule glancing blows don't count in the middle of the fight. If you specify the rules before you can't change them in the middle of the fight. It's like children changing the rules in the middle of a game. It's not fair and whether they meant to say it, or not you don't get to change the rules retroactively. It's poor form. Aside from that I've enjoyed the story so far.
[youtube=https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=umDr0mPuyQc]
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You seem to have an issue with pacing, I'd suggest slowing down a little. Luna's feelings should have developed a lot slower than they did.
I'd also like to point out that Equestria does have omnivorous species in it. They might be animals, but there are omnivorous species there.
Aw great. We gotta deal with this asshole again... Ugh!
I'm a little disappointed with the repetitive feel of the story--all he's doing is reexplaining his magic style. I don't feel like its really going anywhere.
And does Luna have to be in love with him after one encounter? Such an emotion should build to something more, not just be the flip of a switch.
To be honest when it said blueblood i was like well fuke me hes fucked
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Why am I not surprised that this is another Luna Romance... give Sunbutt a romantic chance too.
6138329 I think it's more, she hasn't had people compliment her unless it was politics, The author did say crush, not love. (Author, if I'm wrong I'm sorry)
6139791 someone going to die
6139791 love your user name!
6143272 Don't worry it's both
Why Luna? It makes no sense at all to have either just randomly develop such a crush, when they met in such a short period of time. However, if you had to force a crush on one of the two, it make more sense to force Celestia to develop this quick crush, with her greater knowledge of him and how she's always characterized as wanting to be treated like an ordinary pony.
Secondly, when I go onto the next chapter, I hope you characterize Blueblood well, and not as just this pompous asshole that's disgusted by our main protagonist and then either gets beat up, scared off, or told off. I much prefer stories that say that he just acted that way because he was used to girls trying get into his pants so they can say the bedded a prince, or trying to be gold-diggers, trying to marry him simply because he's rich or he's a prince and he tries to scare them off because of that. To characterize him as just being an asshole for the sake up of being an asshole is lazy and shallow!
Enter the king of all snobs. Any bets on how long it takes before our intrepid human blasts him through a wall?
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Well that's my boner gone anyone else lose it when he announced blue balls
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I bet 30 seconds tops. A minute if He's lucky.
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20 seconds 25 seconds max for him to get rekted also 50 bits he gets his ass handed to on a silver plate
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...got his ass handed to him at 30 second mark I win!
I DO. It is the arrogant and easily off balanced tw*t stance.
Counters consist of backing off to force opponent to move. Then you can push within his guard while off balanced, force him to break stance, then score a point on an idiot who decided that limiting his range on a weapon that requires you to keep opponents at a distance WAS A GOOD IDEA.
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Don't forget, he can use his shield spells to block as well.
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I am a duelist so this scene just pissed me off: beginning, middle, and end. Especially the part where shining attacks his opponent after the match has ended. Dishonorable conduct and stupid mistakes all around. Honestly, the best way to write detailed combat scenes is comparable to determining whether to use affect or effect; people with masters degrees in English literature wrote their entire dissertation without using either.
let's see the red blood of blueblood
This is either gunna be really bad, or REALLY GOOD
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I doubt it's made it into this story, but Revive is only a two-element spell. Life and lightning. Strictly speaking because of that, there was the potential for a running gag where Blueblood keeps getting killed and Adrian is asked, repeatedly, by Celestia to bring him back to life.
Of course she does
Ok didn't Shining say no below the belt???
Oh Sweet Celestia! Tun away! It's avout to get campy! Lol
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Ugh... I rolled my eyes so hard that it hurts for the rest of the day...
Ooooh heellll
I'm actually glad he lost that fight, he IS a battlemage after all it'd be weird if a not fully trained one won against someone like Shining who's pretty much trained all his life with a sword like that.