Twilight goes through a day just like any other, or at least it seems that way at first. As unexplainable events keep repeating themselves, Twilight struggles to control her own mind. In the end, she finds herself on the wrong end of a muzzle and straightjacket, leaving those close to her puzzled as to what went wrong.
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0/10 not even regidar
5148328
More like 10/0 not even shaddup
.....ǝɔuǝsqɐ ɹǝɥ ɯoɹɟ ɯǝǝs ǝɥʇ ʇɐ ʇɹɐpɐ ןןɐɟ ʇı ʍǝuʞ ǝɥs sɐ pןɹoʍ ǝɥʇ guıǝǝs uɐɥʇ ɹǝʇʇǝq sı sıɥʇ ,ʎɐʍ ɐ uı spɐɥɹǝp ,ssǝuʎןǝuoן ɟo ʎʇıuɹǝʇǝ uɐ oʇ pǝuɯǝpuoɔ ǝq ɹǝʌǝɹoɟ ןןıʍ ʇɥgıןıʍʇ
What a lazy half assed attempt at a Twilight Zone episode.
This had no point and there was no real descent into madness that we could follow.
5148396
I can see that. Writing's just one big experiment, and more often than not experiments fail. This one did, simple as that.
Well, that certainly sure was a psychotic meltdown.
Fortunately most who suffer psychosis have episodes, not a continuous psychotic break.
Those who do are called schizophrenic. Catatonic type it sounds like, in Twilight's case.
Trapped between seconds is a really good metaphor.
Schizophrenia causes semi-random brain rewiring, reduction of brain size, overloading of dopamine receptors, floods of inter-neuronal glutamate, and that's all just evidence that people gather after the fact. None of that stuff would happen, if it wasn't being caused by something else, something... completely unknown to medical science. It's like if people's arms and legs are exploding mysteriously, and all doctors can tell is it causes a lot of blood and gore to splatter around the room. So if you get half a limb whacking you upside the head, and there's a guy over there without any arms and legs now, his arms and legs probably exploded. Why? No idea, but the doctor will be happy to research all the colorful patterns in which they explode for a steady paycheck. That's almost as good as an answer, right?
I liked it, but I wish it was expanded on a bit more. Like if there were more chapters. Leaving questions can be a good thing if it's a short story, but it has to be done right.
Again, it's not bad, I just feel it could've benefited from being longer with more to it.
Added to my Insane Twilight collection.
I need a better name for it.