Her Royal Highnesses

Day 1: After Twilight Sparkle moves into her palace and begins seeing travelers about their friendship problems, she quickly realizes that she doesn't know as much about her Equestrian neighbors as she thought.

Day 2: Fluttershy's first day on the throne gives her the chance to pass some new laws to protect her animal friends, but they may have some unintended consequences for her pony friends.

Chapters (2)

Her Royal Highness: Twilight Sparkle · 19th May 2014 · 6,126 words
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Her Royal Highness: Fluttershy · 28th Jul 2014 · 5,475 words
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DragonPony

DragonPony #1 · May 20th, 2014 · 2 · · Her Royal Highness: Twilight Sparkle ·

I really like the story and cant wait to see what other funny guest come there to ask for help. I do have to ask why doesn't Spike get a day to rule. I mean there are 7 of them and he is a member of the court. We all also know that he is just as mature (if not most times more level headed then the girls.) It seems the tree give Spike more credit and attention then any of the others.... some friends lol.

nothingtoseehere

nothingtoseehere #2 · May 20th, 2014 · · · Her Royal Highness: Twilight Sparkle ·

That was a lot better than I thought it'd be. The humor was genuine, every pony felt in character (considering), and the plot has legs. Good job! Faved + 1.

Bootsy Slickmane

Bootsy Slickmane #3 · Jul 2nd, 2014 · · · Her Royal Highness: Twilight Sparkle ·

Okay, wow, this is a cool concept. Some parts were pretty funny (the Diamond scene comes to mind), and I really like the idea here. So far, so good, and I look forward to seeing future chapters.

Bootsy Slickmane

Bootsy Slickmane #4 · Jul 28th, 2014 · · · Her Royal Highness: Fluttershy ·

A very good lesson here, and well-executed, to boot.

nutcase4real

nutcase4real #5 · Jul 28th, 2014 · · · Her Royal Highness: Fluttershy ·

Good story. I shall follow and see where this goes. (Btw, Cupcakes-like Pinkie Pie, hilarious.)

Comment posted by Tetrominon deleted Aug 2nd, 2014

DragonShadow

DragonShadow #7 · Aug 2nd, 2014 · · · Her Royal Highness: Fluttershy ·

4787972

Pinkie didn't actually kill anybody, I didn't even say what she really did at any point. Calm down.

DragonShadow

DragonShadow #8 · Aug 2nd, 2014 · · · Her Royal Highness: Fluttershy ·

4787972

Also I'm sorry, but I am deleting your comment. Not because I'm trying to censor you, but because I don't feel it's necessary or appropriate to swear in the Review section of an E-rated My Little Pony story. For others, this was the review.

"Then you shouldn't have brought it up in the first place. The punchline relies on a meme that hasn't been funny since Moses parted the Red Sea and the whole joke (for lack of a better word) is in a dead heat with the "Lyra gets physically mutilated while absolutely nobody else reacts" for tastelessness. And even setting aside humor as a matter of differing personal tastes, there's no metric in existence that could match up either of them with the tone set by the rest of the fic. The first chapter had promise, but if this sort of jarringly dissonant cruelty-with-a-laugh-track (****) is even the slightest indication of what's to come, I'm (*******) out."

Tetrominon

Tetrominon #9 · Aug 6th, 2014 · · · Her Royal Highness: Fluttershy ·

4788846
So jokes about psychosis, murder and cannibalism are a-okay, but somebody breaks out an F-bomb and only then does it become think-of-the-children time?

DragonShadow

DragonShadow #10 · Aug 6th, 2014 · · · Her Royal Highness: Fluttershy ·

4807873

If someone hasn't read/been exposed to a certain fanfiction (which kids of that age shouldn't have been) then the reference in question is going to fly right over their heads. I don't know if you've noticed this about the show, but there are a lot of jokes that fly over the heads of the younger crowd. If you're unaware of that story Pinkie's last line is just her trying to bribe her way out of jail in a silly manner.

The only thing that might make kids think something's up about it are your Comments here. Thanks for that.

Tetrominon

Tetrominon #11 · Aug 6th, 2014 · · · Her Royal Highness: Fluttershy ·

4808870

I don't know if you've noticed this about the show, but there are a lot of jokes that fly over the heads of the younger crowd.

Go back to those jokes. Write them down as you find them. Get them all together in one place, look at them collectively, determine the patterns into which they fall. Figure it out yourself, because I have neither the time nor the patience to tear up your self-centered ignorance.

The only thing that might make kids think something's up about it are your Comments here.

Pinkie explicitly claims to have been imprisoned for killing another pony, a claim which is never contradicted or even questioned within the story. Just how oblivious do you think kids are?! Actually don't bother to answer that because I have given up trying to care.

DragonShadow

DragonShadow #12 · Aug 6th, 2014 · · · Her Royal Highness: Fluttershy ·

4808996

Pinkie Pie is known for saying lots of ridiculous things with little or no connection to reality. In this case she was acting overly tough because that's what you do in "prison" to avoid being picked on by other inmates (despite that those inmates are all her friends, the mind of Pinkie Pie works by its own rules). Nobody responded to it because they accepted it for Pinkie Pie "being Pinkie Pie".

I don't know what else to tell you here, you're reading far more into it than actually exists. Which is your right, go hold your opinion, but I continue to disagree with it.

ShadowLDrago

ShadowLDrago #13 · May 12th, 2015 · · · Her Royal Highness: Twilight Sparkle ·

Just then the double-doors at the front of the palace swept open with a swoosh of air, and a massive, flowing dress made of snow-white silk and lace moved into the room, almost completely concealing the body of a pony half its size in its mighty folds. It would have slid across the ground as it moved were it not for the two mares following with the back end held carefully in their teeth to keep it from dragging. Lyra and Bon-Bon trailed close behind her, their faces solemn and focused on their assigned task.
Rarity approached her throne with a slow, dainty step, almost as if she was marching down the aisle towards her future husband. The makeup was plastered across her face much more thickly than usual, though true to Rarity’s calling, it didn’t look appallingly overdone. It was fashionable, but somewhat extreme for a small gathering of friends.
It took Rarity a minute to reach her throne and seat herself formally on top of it, leaving her two hoofmaidens to stand by the sides like royal guards.
It wasn’t until she was fully seated that Rarity let her eyes flutter open with a flourish of fake lashes and heavy eyeshadow. “Hello all,” Rarity greeted her friends.

Yep. Gone to her head.

“There, you see?” Rarity smiled in satisfaction. “We’re princess-equivalents!”
Applejack’s hoof clopped against her forehead. “Oh brother…”

I know.

Rarity rolled her eyes. “Don’t put words in my mouth, Applejack. I simply meant that we could have discussed this outside of this dark… but admittedly most sparkly palace.”

It's colors are a bit dark.

“Wait a minute…” Rainbow’s jaw dropped open. “Pinkie’s gonna be in charge one day a week? Alone?”

I gotta agree, not your best move.

Rainbow Dash settled back in her seat again. “Yeah, those aren’t famous last words…”

HEH!

“Nonsense. This palace is mine, technically, it’s only right that I take the seventh day. You’re already being so kind to help me with my royal duties as it is, when you didn’t even ask for any of this.” Twilight smiled warmly. “Thank you all.”

Fair enough.

Applejack looked at each of her friends in turn. “I ain’t gonna say it…”

I however am, SHE TOLD YOU SO.

“Man, that mystical seed thought of everything.” Spike commented as he looked proudly around his private room.
“It is strange that everything it did was so… specific. It gave you a throne and a bedroom. How did it even know about you? Do you think the Tree of Harmony is… alive?”

Well, Trees are alive, but, in the sense you mean, perhaps, semi sentient or psychic to a degree or something, why else would the 6 keys resemble your cutie marks?

“Maybe.” Spike shrugged. “If it is, I’m glad it remembered I was here. Having my own room is going to be awesome!”

Yeah, it was a nice touch in the part of DHX.

“They’re coming to me for advice? All of them?” Twilight blushed. “That sure is a lot of ponies… okay; you’ve got a deal, Mayor. If you’d let them in one at a time for me?”
“With pleasure, Princess Twilight… er, and it’s Care Mare, now.”

Care Mare. Why not.

“It’s certainly more convenient,” Twilight giggled.

Indeed.

“Oh my gosh…” Twilight frowned. “You stole my Smarty Pants doll!? How could you!? I combed the field three times looking for her! My ailing grandmother sent me that doll when I was six! My brother horn-swore over it to be my B.B.B.F.F. when I was eight! I patterned my whole life around the lessons that doll taught me about how to focus on my studies! Without that doll who knows what I would be now! And you just took her without permission!?”
By the time she finished letting her feelings out, Big Macintosh was huddled on the couch looking so much like a guilty dog that she could almost hear him whimpering. She took a deep breath and forced herself to calm down. “Big Macintosh, my friendship lesson to you is, don’t take things without asking. It’s rude and illegal.”

At least she was able to try and calm down.

Twilight paused for a moment. “You love it that much? Even without the spell?” After a nod from the eldest Apple family member she looked down for a moment. “But… here’s another friendship lesson…” Twilight stepped forward and picked up the doll from the floor where it had fallen. “Sometimes even if you love something, it’s better to give it to somepony who loves it more.” She held the doll out to him with a soft smile.

Daaaw.

“And don’t worry about what others will think. It doesn’t matter how many ponies think it’s ‘for girls’, enjoying something you love never makes you less of a stallion.”

A message for all Bronies and a damn good one.

“Oh my… but it’s your job, Cheerilee, and they’re your students, they rely on you to prepare them for the real world later on in life.”

Aye.

“Bah, this town doesn’t produce anybody important! We had to import you just to make some of us important by association!”

Uh, you OK there? And anyPONY.

Twilight Velvet smiled proudly as she took a seat on the sofa. “Oh I had to come and see your new palace, sweetie! Your father and I are so proud of you.”

That's really sweet.

“Of course now it’s time for you to take a prince and make some little princes and princesses.”
Twilight blushed. “Mom, I’m not thinking about that right now.”
“I know, so I did it for you!” Velvet’s horn glowed, dragging a suave-looking unicorn into the room from just outside.
“Gah!” Twilight gasped.
“Hola, senorita Sparkle. My name is Silver Tongue, and you… are the most beautiful mare in these bounteous lands of ours.” The stallion took her hoof and raised it to his lips.
“Uh… thanks…?”

Well then. That happened.

“Why does everypony act like it’s my fault that I’m pretty, popular, smart, and rich?” Diamond Tiara whined on the couch. “I wasn’t the reason that Apple Bloom was raised in a barn! I didn’t give Scootaloo lopsided wings too small to lift a paperweight! I sure didn’t give Sweetie Belle those freaky-ginormous eyes! And I didn’t take away their special talents so they would be worthless blank flanks forever! Nature did that! Not me!”
“Mmhmm…” Twilight Sparkle tapped a pencil against her lips as she regarded the little filly with a studying eye. “How much time have you spent talking to them?”
“Talking? I talk to them every day. Somepony’s gotta remind them how hopeless and meaningless their lives are.”
“Have you considered perhaps stopping and talking to them calmly? Nicely? Perhaps if you spent more time getting to know them, you would be able to overcome this perception you have of them as relatively worthless, and you could see that, even if they’re not perfect, they have their own virtues, and aren’t all that different from yourself after all?”
Diamond Tiara stared at her blankly for a moment of stunned silence. “… That’s stupid, you suck at this.” She slid off the couch and whirled to leave as Twilight’s hoof slammed into her forehead.

HEH!

“My name’s Dragon Shadow, I just arrived in Equestria, and I’ve never met you before… but I sure believe in love at first sight…”

Ah, a bad OC.

“I can’t confront her! She’s practically putting our future children through college! If she marches out we lose a major source of income! I just want somepony to sew her mouth shut!” Aloe sat up and leaned toward Twilight conspiratorially. “You don’t know anypony who can make that happen, do you?”

Er...

“Nothing, of course. Nopony would ever dream of uninstalling the current tyranny and placing a certain new princess on the throne in their stead to usher in a new age of Equestrian peace and prosperity.”
“… Guards.”

Wise move.

“I was talking about the rocks.” Maud nodded slowly. “Imagine it. Being thrown through the air against your will, used like slaves. It’s unimaginable.”

You would be.

“You see, relationships, romantic or platonic, are a give and take thing.”
“Oh! She gives me video games sometimes! She’s so nice!”
“…”

HEH!

“I know… sometimes it just makes me want to… destroy them all! For all the terrible things they’ve ever done to me! They’ll never hurt anypony like that again! Never ever! Not after they can’t move anymore! Yesssss…”

O, kay then.

“Let me put it this way, Twilight.” Care Mare gave her a piercing, searching look. “I saw you when you first came to Ponyville. I watched you grow closer to your friends, unsure, unsteady, but growing more confident all the time. Here you are, beaming your confidence to the rest of the world… and yet now coming and confiding your unsureness and confusion to me. Which of you do you think is the real you, Twilight? The confident princess, or the confused unicorn who is still learning?”
“I…” Twilight gulped. “I don’t know.”
“It was a trick question.” Care Mare approached Twilight’s room at the top of the building and pushed the door open for her. “They’re both the real you. There’s more to a pony than just who they are in public, but that doesn’t mean who they are in public is fake. Flaws, doubts, insecurities, sometimes even less desirable personality traits, they’re all just parts of who we are, pieces of the puzzle that make up each and every pony in Equestria.”

That's, actually very nice.

“Thank you, Care Mare. Your advice just saved me a lot of headache.” Twilight smiled. “I hope I can count on your continued service here in the palace. I’ll make sure you get paid as much as you were getting as mayor. You deserve it.”

VERY nice touch.

ShadowLDrago

ShadowLDrago #14 · Jun 13th, 2015 · · · Her Royal Highness: Fluttershy ·

“Thank you, so much.” Fluttershy pushed herself onto her throne, where Angel leapt off of her shoulder to the arm of the chair, glanced over at Spike’s empty seat, then turned to kick Fluttershy’s hoof in irritation. “Oh, I’m sorry Angel. I don’t know why the seed made a seat for Spike and not you. I guess it must have been an accident.”

Because Spike is likable.

Ponyville’s resident, and most experienced, veterinarian whirled back to her with a look of surprise on her face, then held up her sign. “Fluttershy! I’m angry and I need to be heard!”
“Oh, okay. I’m listening.” Fluttershy nodded.
“You are? Just like that?”
“Um, yes. In fact if you’d like you can come in and tell me what’s bothering you. You don’t need to walk around out here.”
“Oh…” Mane Cureall rubbed the back of her neck. “But I spent most of yesterday making this sign and all.”
“Oh gosh, I’m sorry. You can protest a little more if you’d like, then you can come in and we can talk about what’s bothering you.”
“That would be swell, thanks. I’ll be about an hour.”
“Take your time, please.” Fluttershy smiled warmly and turned to head back inside, approaching her throne again just past Care Mare. “She’ll be in when she’s ready.”
She just barely heard the sound of hoof meeting forehead.

HEH!

Mane Curealll huffed and approached Fluttershy’s throne. “Ponyville! The place is full of insensitive ponies!”

How so?

“But it’s your responsibility to make sure your actions don’t result in harm to the animals, but that’s exactly what’s happening! How did nopony in this palace notice before? Is Princess Twilight Sparkle just that lazy and self-absorbed?”

No, she's just not omniscient.

Fluttershy trailed off at the sound of hooves clopping through the palace toward the throne room. Fluttershy and Mane Cureall turned to watch as Twilight appeared in the rear entrance with a tired smile on her lips, a mane full of tangles, and her eyes half-closed.
“Don’t mind me…” Twilight yawned on her way through moments later when she reappeared again with a steaming mug floating in the air in front of her. “Coffee. Mmmmh.” Twilight flashed them another smile before taking a sip from the mug on her way into the back.

*sigh*

“Are you sure about this, Fluttershy?” Care Mare spoke up from her position beside the throne. “Making new laws to punish ponies should never be taken lightly.”

She's right.

“This branch is dangerous!” The guard held up the branch.
“It… uh… is?”
“Look at these thorns! If that dog licked it the wrong way one of these thorns could scratch up her tongue and make her unable to eat for days!”

Wat.

“I’m sorry miss, putting animals in danger like this for your own amusement is against the law! You’re coming with me!”
“Against the law? But I just didn’t know! I promise from now on I’ll be more careful!”
“Ignorance is no excuse! You’re coming with me!” The guard clapped the other cuff on the startled filly and turned to lead her toward the jailhouse tugging the chains behind him like a leash.
Applejack gulped. “Oh boy… this ain’t gonna go well at all…”

Nope.

The guard narrowed his eyes as his horn glowed. Suddenly Rainbow found herself being dragged down toward the ground by a set of hoofcuffs attached to her forehooves.

Ya had to ask?

“Encouraging innocent animals to do things that are dangerous or unnatural is against the law as of today!” The guard looked up, suddenly dragging the tortoise toward the ground where the machine on his back lifted from the top of his shell.

You're kidding me.

“Wait, please, no more, no mobbblugbbhglbubh!” Lyra’s voice faded away, replaced by faint burbling noises.

What the?

Rarity and Bon-Bon stared down at Lyra curiously as the green unicorn lifted herself up slowly on her forehooves, trying to pull herself upright. Her eyes went wide as her hooves began to grind against the floor, being pulled slowly back into the bathroom and out of sight once again.
“Do remember to wash behind her tail.” Rarity called after her.
“Aaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh!”

Should, I prepare her funeral?

“You don’t treat cats that way! Forcing animals to do things against their will is against the law!”
“It… what?” Rarity gasped as a pair of hoofcuffs were slapped onto her hooves, with another smaller cover on her horn. “Hey! What are you doing!? Do you know who I am!?”
“Silence, criminal scum!” the guard forced her onto the ground. “You have the right to remain silent, anything you say can and will-“
Lyra slammed into the floor in front of them suddenly, crawling up toward them. “Arrest me, please…”
“Oh, you’re all under arrest! This is practically a conspiracy!”
“Oh thank Goddess…” Lyra crawled up to the guard and nestled into his side, turning to look fearfully back toward the bathroom.

This is getting absurd-

“-have you locked in a dungeon and have the key ingested by a wild badger!” Rarity banged her hooves against the bars of her cell as the guards walked away. “Are you listening to me!?”

Nope.

“So what brings you three in here?” Applejack asked lazily from the back of the cell.

You're blasé about all this.

“Hmph, that guard has a problem with feline hygiene!” Rarity exclaimed.
“I got mauled by a cat…” Lyra groaned.
Applejack cocked her head. “And you got arrested for that?”
“Uh-huh…”

Blame that crazy mare who's convinced Fluttershy.

Rainbow Dash stepped forward from the side of the cell and shook her head. “This is ridiculous! Whatever these new laws are that Fluttershy is passing, they’re going to get everypony in trouble!”

Oh yeah.

“For killing a pony! So don’t you come near me! I know how prison works!” Pinkie Pie growled menacingly.

OK then, I'm just gonna go, this way. *runs*

“Pardon me?” Rarity huffed. “For one thing, I am not your slave and I do not obey commands! For another, they obviously will make the bars of a jail magic-resistant, and who knows what it will do to me if I even tried it? It could wipe out my mind, suppress my magic forever, or all kinds of horrible things!” She blinked for a moment, tapping her hoof against her chin. “Lyra, be a dear and try to open the door for us.”

Calm yourself. Also, wait what?

The magical aura began to cover the door lock… but then Lyra’s horn popped off.

The f*ck?!

“Uh… wait for Princess Twilight to notice what’s happening and not get any other body parts popped off?” Bon-Bon suggested.

Wise move-

Applejack rubbed the back of her neck. “Yeah, I s’pose you’re right. It’s just a matter of time before everything gets set right. How much damage can these laws do in one day?”

A lot.

Mane Cureall huffed, “tell me about it! I’m glad we finally have a princess like you, who genuinely cares about non-ponies, in some sort of power. I’m sure we’re going to make the world a much better place now.”

Capital T. Also, there is a term I REALLY want to call her here, but for the sake of keeping this comment section civil, and not wanting to do anything stupid, I'll keep my mouth shut.

"For starving that poor, innocent creature!" The guard jerked his hoof toward Angel, who was still sprawled out on Fluttershy's back and groaning in hunger.
Fluttershy gasped. "Oh, no no, we're not starving him I promise! We're going to get him some dinner right now!"
The guard narrowed his eyes. "Tell it to the princess, criminal scum!"

She IS the princess.

"But I am-"
___
"-The princess..." Fluttershy pressed her hooves against the bars of her cell as the guard turned to march callously away from them.

Toldja.

"Rarity!?" Fluttershy whirled to look into the next cell, seeing almost all of her friends sitting around leaning against the bars. "Oh my goodness! Girls, what are you doing in here?"

Arrest due to the Mane Cureall's crazy laws.

"What are you all glaring at?" Mane Cureall stepped in front of Fluttershy. "You're all here because none of you know how to take care of your pets! If you had any good sense, or even a heart that wasn't full of your own selfishness, you wouldn't be in here!"

And if you weren't a lunatic, you might realize that they do have good sense.

"Maybe they made a mistake..." Fluttershy trailed off for a moment, then looked up at Mane with a sad look in her eye. "But did you ever correct them?"

I don't think that's been brought up, no.

"You're right..." Fluttershy approached the side of the cell toward the townsponies, who looked shocked and hurt by the accusations. "Maybe a lot of these ponies don't know how to take care of their pets... but instead of educating them and teaching them, you held it over them, and tried to get them punished just for not knowing as much as you do." Fluttershy took a deep breath and whirled on Mane Cureall now. "You have the knowledge and education to make things better for everypony, and instead of using it to make things better, you used it to make things worse. And I went along with you..." She hung her head. "I'm a terrible princess..."

No, you just made some mistakes, so does everyone.

Rarity spoke from her cell. "Fluttershy, darling, you're not a terrible princess..."

See?

"I think we're going to need to talk about that before you say it." Twilight's voice cut through the silence as she approached the cells flanked on either side by the royal guards. "Please let them all out, I'm exonerating them all of their crimes against the animals."

FINALLY!

"I have no doubt you had only the best intentions Fluttershy." Twilight smiled and patted her shoulder with one hoof. "We'll discuss this with Spike and our journal..."

Good idea.

"What are you doing?" Twilight approached the guards. "I told you to let out everypony accused of crimes against animals."
The guard turned toward her. "She's not in there for crimes against animals."
Applejack hesitated. "Then... what is she in there for?"
Pinkie Pie grinned with a nervous squeak. "Won't you let me out? I made cupcakes..."

This is a reference to that fic. No. Bad author, we do NOT reference THAT.

"Oh gosh, Twilight, I don't know if I can..."
"I do." Twilight smiled warmly. "Just trust yourself and use your own knowledge. Right?"
Fluttershy smiled with a soft blush. "Okay, Twilight... I'll do my best... for you..."

Daaw.

I know people are going to do it, so please don't take Pinkie's seeming murder too seriously. It's just a joke, and Pinkie Pie would never really chop a pony into bits and bake her into a round of delicious mouthwatering cupcakes.

If you say so.

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