As Shining Armor stares down the barrel of the guns of war, he expressed his final thoughts to himself, his soldiers, and his enemies.

A challenge fic written for Emerald Flight of The Writer's Group. I had to write a story based purely on the phrase 'Pity the Rain.' This is what happened.

Most ponies assume that something is wrong with Ditzy Do's eyes. Theories range from a head injury to a genetic disorder to muscle damage behind her eye. The crueler folk suggest she's just retarded. Nicer ponies say it's just a party trick she never got tired of.

They're all wrong. They're all very, very wrong.

I discovered the truth one day in conversation with her. One eye would always look at me, and the other would wander. At least, I thought it was wandering. So while we were talking, I followed it. Goddess in heaven I wish I had not. Never follow the other eye. Ever. Because Ditzy Do's eyes work fine.

She's just watching something. That... thing that's always in the corner of our eyes. And if she looks at you with both eyes?

Goddess save you.

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Preread by BrastaAAura17, Chase Cosmicwing and dreamingnoctis. Cover art also by dreamingnoctis. Guy's a bro.

This story is a sequel to Schadenfreude

Schadenfreude. A name known throughout the castle, and frequently spoken in conjunction with the phrase "Oh, hell no." He's annoying. He's an expert at annoying the crap out of ponies. And he's Prince Blueblood's butler.

He also loves his job.

Join Schadenfreude as he regales with the tale of how Princess Twilight tries to correct his Cutie Mark.

It's a doozy. Or not.

(New cover art by the fantastic TodayIWriteFanfics!)

To Twilight Sparkle and Princess Celestia, it is a simple surprise visit to Canterlot. To the ponies of the Equestrian Civil Service, it is twenty-four hours of chaos, politics, weaponized dessert, politics, underhooved manipulation of media, politics, and things batrachian and tentacular. Who said bureaucracy isn't exciting?

Something isn't right in Ponyville. Everypony is acting strangely and Twilight can't figure out why.

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Terrific reading done by Voiceguy. Check it out!

The Battle of the Bands is one important thing to Sunset Shimmer, besides earning the rest of the student body's trust but that is hard to gain. Twilight invites her over to study together but she wonders if this is more than just a study session.

Collaboration with DiamondBurritos.

It is said to find one's destiny is an amazing experience. That there is a certain comfort to knowing exactly where you fit in the grand scheme of things. Not for me though. Comfort has long forsaken me ever since my cutie mark appeared.

Because there is no place for me. I am a cog that doesn't fit. A sour note in a beautiful composition.

I don't belong.

Ever since that one horrible day, my life has taken one bad turn after another without a pause to breathe.

They call me a monster.

They call me an abomination.

They call me a freak.

That isn't my name...

But you know what?

If everypony in Equestria will only see a monster then I'll gladly become one.

...and I'll be damn good at it too.

2/24/15 EDIT: I'm making this a full-fledged fic. With chapters and all that it implies.

A pair of princesses and a pair of humans get a stupid idea.

FIND IT HERE

(Once called Little Pony Academia) Join Twilight Sparkle on an epic quest as she enrolls in to a prestigious witch school to make friends and stop a overpowering enemy! Students have been going missing, and Twilight wants to get to the bottom of it. Can she figure out the cause before its too late?!

Eureka has to defend her home, and with no options remaining she turns to a black art. She turns to Pyromancy. What followed is recorded as: The Trial of Eureka, The Last Pyromancer. Her last act is to plead her case and try to avoid exile.

Part of Equestrium