We all know how this goes, don't we? Some unlucky schmuck goes to a Halloween party or convention dressed up as someone evil, gets sent to Equestria, and then ends up antagonizing the locals.

Well my story goes a bit differently. My name is Isaac Donohue, and after a night of drunken partying that I STILL can't remember, I wake up in Equestria fifteen hundred years before the events of canon with five seemingly random superpowers:

Angelic Physiology, so I'm frickin gorgeous now. Oxygen Independence, so I don't need to breath. Asexual Reproduction, just call me Mister Mommy why don't you...Bubble Breath, something useless that I rarely use. Power Replication, otherwise known as a game breaker.

So anyways I befriended everyone's favorite draconequus Discord, and we made such beautiful chaos together. Well, it was more of me trying to reform him before he got stoned by the Princesses in an effort to change history for the better. What a waste of time that was, and as a result of this I got petrified as well for being his accomplice. Can you believe that?

Since I'm free, I've decided to settle down and rule a kingdom of my own. I'm sure there are enough tyrants in the world that need to be overthrown despite Sunbutt's best efforts. But if there aren't any, I'm pretty sure I can steal the Crystal Empire from Sombra before Shining Armor and Cadence do.

The only problem is, THE LAW WON'T STOP CHASING ME!

A LoHAV story that I'm writing as I go on.

ANNOUNCEMENT 6/4/2017: I'm sorry, but this story is cancelled. This has been a long time coming. As I've progressed as a writer I look back on this story with increasing amounts of disgust. Still, I know people enjoy it for some reason which is why I'm leaving it up for posterity's sake. Maybe I'll completely rewrite it from the ground up in the future, but that time is not now.

The Gates of Tartarus have been breached, releasing evils long since vanquished back into Equestria.

Celestia sends her student Twilight Sparkle to investigate the Gates of Tartarus, but when things don't go quite as planned the young unicorn is forced into a difficult position. Through blood and tears she will be tested harshly, both physically and mentally. With unparalleled strength of self and unwavering faith in her princesses, Twilight takes up a mantle that no pony should ever be forced to bear.

Can't forget to mention Ping111 and Inquisitive Dash for helping out with pre-reading and pointing out errors when ever they have the time.

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That Collab Project I've been working on... It's alive!!! If you like my work, feel free to give SotES a try!

Most legends are born from a single small grain of truth, others are born from the pure imagination of a few ponies, but as Ponyville very well knows not all legends are that. When something saves Apple Bloom from a pack of Timberwolves will she be able to convince the others of what she saw or will she just have to find the truth herself?

The Supplement to this story is ready to be read. It's right here. Read it. I mean... if you want to. I'm not your boss.

I would like to give a big big thanks to Danupert for pre-reading chapters 4 through 12. Thank you so much.
Also want to thank Annoyed Changeling, Ratfinkdos, and Crystal Static for being willing to help with this story as pre-readers. Thank you very much.

"We live in what we believe is a shell, a closed sphere where all is constant. As physics would have it, nothing in the universe is unique, nothing is wasted or destroyed: it is repurposed. But now I prove them wrong. With a single idea, I realize that we are not so insignificant as we think. We are not slaves to destiny and existence. We are the ashes of gods, the fruits of eternity, the products of choice and fate. We are not meaningless. This universe is not our prison.

This is our empire."

- Excerpt from A Lexicon of Impossibilities, by Cypher

Special thanks:
AeronJVL, for the amazing cover art.
Emberspeak, Forderz, RTStephens, PropMaster, and RazgrizS57 for their editing.
shortskirtsandexplosions for the idea.