Chapter 1 (would have been 2)
The Changeling Cycle
by Raith021
Chapter 1
"Shining, Aunt Tia, where's Twil- oh my!" Cadence took a calming breath "Oh, that feels so weird."
"Yeah, now that you mention it, seeing Twi like that did feel weird." Spike said, coming out of the kitchen carrying two plates and a bottle of syrup with his tail "Oh, and there's only so much space, so we'll have to eat out here now." and set the plates in front of Hardened Steel and Iron Hooves, and put the syrup between them.
Celestia cleared her throat gently while walking to the table "That's part of changeling magi-biology, when one means no harm to a pony, or other beings for that matter, they produce a pheromone-like field that allows them to not be considered a 'monster' on sight." and had a sip a coffee.
"That's... oddly convenient, also disturbing, what if Chrysalis had figured out a way to use it?" Twilight shuddered and calmed herself with her own coffee.
"No need to worry about anything like that, Discord was very careful when he created the race, before he turned evil."
"Discord made changelings? That... would explain a lot, even with using love as food, I can see taking the form of ponies could be rather chaotic."
"Well, his original intent was for them to be a race of kindly pranksters that would feed on the merriment, or whatever emotion, their actions would produce. Which reminds me, you won't need to do anything... untoward to feed yourself, if you hadn't figured out such already."
Twilight blushed just noticeably "Oh, that's what all this is in the air, I can see emotions, neat." with a giggle and a smile, "And now that I know I don't need force them away from myself, they taste amazing!"
"Uh... taste? don't you mean feel Twi?" asked Spike "Though I guess you don't ‘need’ food, so that answers my other question." and gave a plate to Shining "Basically, I don't need to make more batter."
"Yes Spike, taste, and no, you don't need to make more just for me." she then turned to Celestia "Now, what about emotions like annoyance, or even anger?"
"The way I've been told it works, positive emotions will be both more filling and better tasting the stronger they are, and the closer they are to love, and negative emotions will likewise be less filling, and at worst taste revolting as they are closer to hate." Spike delivered a fresh plate "Thank you."
"You're lucky Twilight, I can only see them, do they look like strands and dust clouds for you too?" Cadence chimed in.
"That... doesn't surprise me as much as it maybe should, it makes sense you would have studied any magic you could with a connection to love, and yes." Twilight remarked, had a sip of her coffee, then rather suddenly "Wait a second, even with my ‘put-at-ease field’ and checking my memory, why did nopony freak out, almost entirely?"
Celestia finishes a bite before speaking "Ah, a good question Twilight..."
"Wait, not as important but I just noticed; just "Twilight", not "my faithful student" ?" a slight frown crossed her face.
"Well, you are fellow royalty now, being a changeling queen, and while we're on noticing such things; you don't seem so apprehensive with me now." smirking as she has more coffee.
"Fair enough on both, sorry about interrupting." and under her breath "I didn't catch myself on that."
"That's okay Twilight, you actually reminded me; you'll need to come up to Canterlot in a few days, there are some things that will need to be properly officiated to go over. Now, to answer why the freaking out was barely existent, the full version of The Changeling History, not the short-short version I told you" nodding to Shining, Spike bringing Cadence her plate and she licked her lips "since their creation, changelings have always stayed near ponies, from the nomads they started as, though the tribes, and the villages, through the unification that became Equestria as we know it, but life changed after a good few centuries of myself, Luna and Discord ruling the lands. When Discord went mad, and started calling himself king, after a hard month of the chaos he caused, we finally trapped him as a statue, this is when the first queen was made from the best suited to lead them all, she decided to stay close to the established royalty and as such little changed, even at her death and transfer of power to Starswirl the Bearded, marking the first and only known changeling king, things only changed after a millennium, when Luna became Nightmare Moon and was subsequently sent to the moon, the queen of the time wanted she and her own to be a nation within Equestria, a cycle started, and ever since every third or fourth generation has gone from wanting to be close or far from Equestrian rule and public knowledge, to the other, the worst being Chrysalis' ‘grandmother’, and her decisions that, eventually, led Chrysalis to her recent actions."
"Wow, Starswirl, a changeling?! Oh uh." she shook her head to refocus herself "Two questions though; don't the history books place Luna's becoming Nightmare Moon and Discord's imprisonment in the same year, and what was the ‘short-short version’ Shining got?"
Shining chimes in, finishing a bite "Hmm, when the history books were translated from a translation, of a translation, of the originals, only about fifty percent stayed accurate to what really happened, at least from what I was told soon after I became captain." he had a sip of coffee "And all I got as a briefing was ‘before Chrysalis, changelings have only been neutral at worst, and your sister has just told me she's the latest queen’ the rest of the way to the barracks were spent getting me to calm down, agree that I would only get hostile if things went south, and stop hyperventilating." blushing near the end.
Celestia finished her cup, and refills it "Since we're on the subject, why didn't you seem to panic about yourself changing Twilight?"
"Ah, well, after going through ‘lesson zero’ with Smarty Pants and everypony, and looking back on the wedding and realizing I could have far more tactful, I did everything I could to not panic, though I do think part of the process helped with that too, or it felt like it at least." she then absentmindedly levitated an apple to herself and takes a bite "Hmm, interesting, I just got emotions from that, A.J. really must grow these with love, odd that I can't see it though. Oh, before I forget I wanted to ask, and if you don't mind telling me, what sort of things do I need to go to Canterlot for?"
"I would have told you before leaving anyway." She said with a sweet, motherly tone "What you'll be in Canterlot for is putting how you wish to run, structure, and build your hive, or swarm if you prefer, the only difference being the word used."
Spike returned with his own plate, and puts a generous quantity of syrup over his waffles "Hey Twi, do you know how you started becoming a changeling in the first place?" before starting to eat.
"Well... no, but I'd have to guess Chrysalis managed to stealthily cast a spell just before Shining and Cadence cast their spell." she had a sip of coffee "That said, she could have done something to me nearly any time nopony was watching, I'd like to think I'd have noticed though."
Having finished her cup, Celestia looked at the clock "Oh, sorry to eat and run, but I'll need to get back to Canterlot for day court soon. Sirs Steel and Hooves." the guard ponies snapping to salute "Until further notice, you're to keep Twilight safe, just in case some crazy pony tries something." they simply nodded and put their back hooves down
"Princess," Shining asked "Will you need Cadence and myself to return to Canterlot as well?"
"I'd take guesses as to why you ask, but I'll keep this short and just let you two take two weeks." then simply teleported away.
"For the record, it feels like it's been a forever since I've really gotten to visit with my little sister." he said to the now vacant space.
Giggling at his antics, Twilight then turned to the two guards "I'll be keeping my being a changeling quiet until that official paperwork's done, so if you could be without your armor to help with that, I do want to let the girls know about this, we'll also need to get food for all six of us." and then went to the door as they undid their armor.
"Well, since we're here to visit," Cadence chimes in "we might as well go with"
"Yep, everypony all set?" then seeing her wings, gave a light hearted sigh "Except me." a plume of purple flame later "Much better, OK, first: Sweet Apple Acres."
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You've got your google drive comments pasted at the end of the chapter.
Fun so far. One thing struck me as odd, though. The revelation that Twilight is not just a changeling, but the queen of the changelings, seems like not nearly enough of a revelation. I think it would make sense for Twilight to realize she's a changeling but have to be informed that she's actually the queen, with at least a little shock on Twilight's part about that.
3029341
Oops.
fixed, and thanks.
3029370 What (s)he said.
good so far, only problem: They seem to be lacking emotion entirely. I can understand them not completely flipping out, but NO ONE/PONY can be that calm during that entire reveal.
Celestia: Twilight, changeling Queen, hmn... could be worse, though nothing to worry about.
I like how everypony is so calm in here, in any other fanfic it would end up in huge conflict. but Twilight managed to stop her panic attack and prevent it.
Interesting, if a little subdued.
Keep up the good work. Deus tecum.
More
Better....
Like the history
Update asap.frend...
4380888 I'd ask why you say that, but I know very well why.
I do have story in my head, just need to get it out.
4417121 good. Good. Hurry frend, hurry. Need more changling stories like this.
nice start, would love to see more!
4812331 I am (slowly) continuing, it's been difficult to get it out of my brain and into a word processor.
is this dead??!!
4852916
No, just very very very very very slow in terms of getting out more of it.
4854039 OK!!
Are there any plans to complete this story? I ask because I am going to favorite this because the plot behind it sounds interesting. HOWEVER, until it is completed, I am going to give it a thumbs down. Because while I may approve of the plot behind the story, I DO NOT approve of the fact that it has been 1 year, 4 months, 4 weeks, and 1 day since the last update. I mean, I understand that greatness can't be rushed, but needing 516 days in order to update the next chapter means one of three things. A: You've given up on the book (this is the most likely scenario). B: You’re too busy to write any more (this is understandable, even if highly annoying). Or C: You're dead (this is a scenario with a 50% probability chance, seeing as how people die every day.) If option C makes you feel uncomfortable than that means two things. You are obviously not dead, and I am sorry for having that as one of the three possibilities. Also, don’t give up! Your fans deserve better! I, of course, meant that in the best and most encouraging possible way.
5483747 It's not any of those reasons, I have been trying to get mare story out of my brain and onto digital paper, but it's been VERY slow going due to a lack of my creative energies.
And being honest, I'm a little disappointed in myself for taking so long to put out more of this story.
5483884
Thank GOD! someone who actually took the first comment the way that it was meant to be taken! As a motivational comment! I was afraid that it, for whatever reason, was failing to achieve the desired effect across the board! You, my good sir, are a breath of fresh air compared to the other 4 replies that I got to this comment. I thank you from the bottom of my heart for actually being able to take the first comment the correct way. Also now that I have gotten that out of the way,
Well except for those other four replies that is.
It's a little creepy how well everyone is taking this.
Flat. Flat flat flat. The dialog is flat, the characters are one dimensional, the plot is smoothed over. Flat.
5732625
That won't help me improve as a writer.
how is it flat? how are the characters one dimensional?
I want constructive criticism, not just criticism.
5732685 Whuf. Um, let's go with an example. Celestia and Shining meet up with Twilight at the end of your prologue. You spare a couple words to tell us that there's an emotional context to their actions, but you don't give us any sign of it. They just walk in, stand stock still, and get right down to business.
A moment later, they've confirmed Twilight is who she says she is. The tone doesn't change.
A moment later, Twilight has taken changeling form. The tone doesn't change. Her appearance isn't detailed. Spike, having no idea what's going on, guesses the details correctly and accepts it with one sentence and a bare-bones apology. The tone still hasn't changed.
In short, you wrote the scene where Twilight reveals her new body to her brother, her mentor, and her oldest friend with all the emotion and detail of a couple strangers talking about the weather.
And the entire story is pretty much the same.
5732709
Thank you, that actually helps me.
So far this is really cool. And the concept sounds AWESOME!
Here have a moustache
Hmm. This could be something really good, but as of yet, the current chapters need work, and the obvious 'it only has two short chapters' problem needs fixing. I'd like to see this grow into a great story, but it's not there yet.
Perhaps this comment is just echoing others' statements, but I thought it make it anyway.
This amuses me.
To short need more chapters.
Interesting
good story but it need moar, and how relax everyone was during everything was kind of odd but different, I like it
5732685
will there be more of the story?
8476419
I have more story thought out, but I've been having trouble (for way too long) getting it out of my head and into a word processor.
I'll hopefully get more chapters out, but I've marked the story "on hiatus" just for how long it's been since I have, so don't hold your breath.
8476666
alright if you say so
More?
8476666
Has anypony offered to help you write it down?