Chapter 3: A Letter
Dear Princess Celestia,
Unfortunately this is not a Friendship Report proper, as I have yet to learn a full lesson on friendship since my last missive. I do have some thoughts on the matter, so I hope you don’t mind my discussing them with you.
Yesterday, your sister Luna came to visit me and ask my advice about something. I believe I was able to help, and I’m happy to report that I think she has an excellent chance of success now!
The point, however, was that during our discussion, I pulled out a chalkboard so that we could write up a list (stop snickering Princess, lists are very helpful!) and that made me think about Pinkie Pie. Pinkie has the incredible ability to pull seemingly any object required for her wacky antics out of thin air, with no discernable preparation. If she requires a ball, or a triangle, or an armoire for her visual gag, she simply has one.
In contrast, in order to ensure that I have chalkboards available for my explanations, I had to actually go out and buy several boards, and chalk, and erasers, and hide them strategically throughout Ponyville. Not only that, but I also have to check them every week or so to make sure that they have not been moved or damaged, and to replace used chalk. Obviously it’s worth the effort, or I wouldn’t do it, but still.
So, I found myself briefly feeling jealous of Pinkie Pie. I thought back to my investigations of her premonitory senses, however, and realized that being jealous of Pinkie was like being jealous of the ocean; she is a grand force, vast and implacable, and I could no more be like her than I could lift a mountain, or breathe on the sun. I must simply accept that she is, and find joy in her friendship.
And then I thought: Wait. What if that wasn’t just an amusing metaphor? What if she really is a vast cosmic force? A shard of primordial chaos from beyond the Celestial Spheres, ensconced in neon pink flesh? She is, after all, possessed of amazing and ridiculous powers, and it is only her true and unending love for ponykind that prevents her antics from becoming dangerous (like another being of chaos I will not name here).
So, that’s where I’ve become stuck. It’s not much of a hypothesis, since I have no feasible way to test it. I did think of one method that might work, but since I have no way of reassembling Pinkie Pie afterwards, I had to reject it.
Also, don’t worry, I haven’t forgotten rule 18: Never perform a science experiment on anypony without their express permission. That was an extremely embarrassing three days and I have no wish to repeat the experience.
I’ve just gone back to proofread my letter and find I must apologize for being somewhat ‘rambly’. I’ve been in a really good mood since yesterday and that always seems to affect my writing that way. Regardless, I’m looking forward to hearing your thoughts, Princess. Until then, I remain as always,
Your Faithful Student,
Twilight Sparkle
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hmm short sweet 2 chapters of TwiLuna goodness and then a 3rd Chapter I can't place, like what happened with the TwiLuna.
overall I like TwiLuna approved.
I'll make a full statement later since I have to go but know that I liked it!
I'm with justwannaread on this one. Where does the 3rd chap fit in? Nonetheless, great fic^^
2157626
(Nice Troll)
Same here for me, there is something missing between C 2 / C 3 to bring this two together, and something at the end of C 3 to end this Story.
Well you could say that you have started two story at the same time, first the TwiLuna *which is quiet nice and a little bit wired for me because Luna get school from Twilight how to Love her..* Well Ok I could imagine that Twilight would do this..
And than a Letter conversation between Twilight an Celestia which refers about Pinkie Pie’s, well Chaotic nature and Twilights worries/thoughts about it. ... ok
(this dosen't fit in there for me, without a transition to this chapter)
I would like to see a response from Celetsia about this mater.
Ok your mention Lunas visiting yesterday in the Letter but this could also be totally out of another story.
My Opinion:
I would suggest that you split this two because both of them would be a good and interesting Storyies.
The Twiluna doesn’t need anything more if you separate it from your C 3
But your Letter needs another Chapter.
For the first time not bad.
For Grama and Errors ask sompony else.
Oh and btw I totally like your Style of the First chapter (Old English speaking Luna is best Luna)
This is just my opinion.
justwannaread, Mr.Market, KibaWR, and Raitythunder, thank you all for being kind to me. *bows*
2157626>>2157896>>2157906
As far as the third chapter not fitting in, I thought that it would be amusing to show Twilight dropping hints to Princess Celestia about what was happening while talking about something completely unrelated. I guess it must not come across though.
This is what happens when you try to do your own editing.
Regardless, the story is complete and will not be changed or added to beyond correcting typographical or grammatical errors. We all must live with what we have done.
2157960
Only the following line did indicate to me that Luna made a succesful approch on Twilight and Twilight accepted or is about to accept the confession.
"Yesterday, your sister Luna came to visit me and ask my advice about something. I believe I was able to help, and I’m happy to report that I think she has an excellent chance of success now!"
But then it all gone
talk and I was a bit lost.
2157960 ahh I see^^ great idea^^
Now have Twilight and Luna accidentally reveal their budding relationship to Celestia in a somewhat embarrassing manner!
You can never have enough TwiLuna! This little piece has me itching to add chapters to my own ongoing TwiLuna story.
Luna's dialogue in chapter 1 was spot-on without being overdramatically Shakespearean, while Twilight's lesson in chapter 2 was both perfectly in character and worth a good laugh. The letter about Pinkie almost threw me; I had to re-read it to make sure it was in continuity with the others. Maybe it could have done with dropping a hint or two more about the "help" Twilight gave Luna.
Thumbs up and a gold star for you. Keep it coming!
2160330
I've been pretty well convinced at this point that chapter 3 should have been written completely differently, if at all. I think I got way too excited about the phrase "a shard of primordial chaos from beyond the Celestial Spheres, ensconced in neon pink flesh" and let it overrun the entire letter.
“Whenever you feel an impulse to perpetrate a piece of exceptionally fine writing, obey it – whole-heartedly – and delete it before sending your manuscripts to press. Murder your darlings."
Also, I'm a huge fan of yours, so I'm holding in such a "squee" right now.
Neat.
I like it. It starts with Twiluna then rambles a bit about Pinkie (possibly a distraction for Celestia's sake) then goes back to Twiluna with the last line about Twilight being happy after her conversation with Luna.
Oh, Twilight is an Awesome Troll (albeit a nice one) ...
2163099
I like to think she's playful.
Thank you for your kind words.
meh... 3rd chapter kinda ruined this one for me...