The Scientist

by TwizzleDragon

The things I don't regret.

The Scientist
Written by TwizzleDragon
Inspired by: None of your business

You are in a daze, confused where you are, what you are, who you are, yet you know all about this place... this magical wonderland, Equestria.

You find yourself clenching an object in your hands.

What is it? You wonder, unhandling the object to find that it is nothing other than a plastic figurine of Twilight Sparkle, your favorite pony, your pretend waifu.

You rub your fingers across the plastic pony, taking notice of all its features and beauty. You feel the hair, fake and unauthentic, yet so... so... meritorious. Something you had nothing akin to.

You get up from the spot where you had lain. You look around, dotting all the caricature features the land beheld unto your sight. The ground moistened to an extrinsic configuration. You know the land is not of your contour.

Finally, you start walking along this beaten, yellowed road. The leaves fall off the trees aligning this perfect path. You can see down it far enough to take notice of a small, stone bridge uniting your path with what looks to you as a cupcake city, a russian city be it a cartoon.

You get closer, and closer, to the point where you are finally stepping on this bridge. You notice all the ponies, remembrance of your fandom to a cartoon world flushes back into your sweet little mind.

You now recall your times; reading fics about ponies, the late nights staying up to watch the show, the secrets you had made latent to all about your secret fandom, the stories of clop you... you enjoyed with a thrusting passion, and the pony clothes you hide under that baggy clothing, you know, all the sweatshirts and sweatpants just as a rous to hide your awesome clothing. Rarity would not be happy with such fashion hidden!

With your newfound realization, you continue into the town, determined to visit your favorite pony. Who else, other than Twilight?

Fluttershy? And what would a brony do with Fluttershy? Well, I could... No... She would run away as soon as it rose...

You run through the streets of Ponyville. The scores of ponies stop and stare at you while you skip like you’re a child again. You look down and notice you’re naked.

Who cares? They’re just admiring!

You start sprinting again down the street. You hear a familiar noise coming towards you, a scooter. You look back to see the chicken. Only to see that she’s not there. You turn around, still looking for the penguin.

WHACK!

The Dodo slams into your genitalia. But you are so excited about Twilight that you ignore the pain.

The kiwi is screaming, disgusted and terrified of what she had slammed her face into.

“What was that!? Wh-wha...?!” You hear the kea scream, ignoring her confusion to see that sexy pony you’ve always wanted to see.

Oh, What’s this? So.. intriguing... No books? I must experiment...

Why hello there... What do I do with you...?

Finally, after sweating off a pound running through this pastel realm, you arrive at your destination. The library! You stop in front of the door, catch your breath, and prepare to have your mind blown. After a minute of rest, you knock on the door of your beloved unicorn.

You wait for a bit... a bit turns into minutes... minutes turn into hours... hours turn into... Oh wait, Spike’s opening the door.

“Who the buck are you?” said the snail.

You ignore the spider and push him out of the way, bending over to get through the door. You head straight up the stairs, which you can clearly just jump up in barely two steps because of the size difference.

How would people convert these together? You think, directed at the Conversion Bureau stories.

You arrive in her room, your waifu, your hoofbuddy, your sweetie, your clop interest. You look around for her, the room is empty. Angst, you struggle down back to Spike, who looks at you like your a jerk.

Come on, it was just rude. Get over it lizard.

“Where is Twilight?” you ask with determination.

“What’s it matter to you? What are you anyways?”

“There’s no time!” you grab and shake his arms.

“Ah! She’s... She’s... Uhhh...”

“Where!”

“Downstairs...” Spike gives a subtle look, turning away from you as soon as your grip loosens.

What the hell is his problem?

You walk gingerly down the stairs, admiring the fine wooden steps clearly carved from a great pony woodworker in the depths of the Canterlot dungeon, where all the orphans go.

“Spike! What are you doing? I told you not to-” Twilight frets as she turns around to meet your eyes, to know that you are a creature never before in a book. “What... What are you...?”

You stare deep into her eyes. They sparkle and glare back at yours. It was to you as the world had languished itself just for this moment.

After a brief moment of awkwardly staring at each other, never bothering to introduce each other, you cough, ruining the moment.

Fuck...

Twilight giggles, she walks up to you and starts examining your features. You hope she will take more notice in a feature that is at her eye level. The tattoo of her cutie mark on your thigh.

She starts sniffing you, and you can’t remember if you took a shower today or not.

Will she find me repulsive if I smell bad? How do you arouse a pony anyways...? Why is she sniffing me anyways? Ponies are a bit odd...

You jump to an odd feeling... a feeling you did not expect yet. The feeling of a tongue.

Twilight reverts to her pad, using her magic to write down some notes. You stare deep into her flank. Your sick mind thinks of many fantasies of the past you had with Twilight.

And it rises.

She turns around, frightened of embarrassment, you attempt to cover your area with your hands. She only bares sight towards it even more, thinking you are hiding something, which you are.

“Oh!” Twilight says, staring at your crotch, looking passed your hands. “Phthirus pubis, such a rare species!” She looks up at you, you shoot back with a confused look, knowing not what she is talking about. “You won’t mind, would you?” You nod your head in agreement. She walks closer, inching her head closer towards your area, thinking of the pleasure you are about to receive.

You feel strange, as if she is trying to eat your hair as if it were like hay.

Umm... Okay...?

You feel her bite down, stretching your forestation with her mouth.

“These will do great with my collection!” Twilight places the sample into a jar. “Now, what are you? I’ve never read such a book about a creature like you. Where do you come from? Are you not Equestrian?” she sputtered out many more questions.

“I’m... I’m a human...”

“Human?”

“Yes, we’re not from this place... Are you sure you want to just ask me questions? I sort of figured we could do something... special...”

“Special? Oh, I suppose, before we experiment with you.”

Experiment? Oh she wants me!

“What do you have in mind?”

“Uhh...”

Dumbfounded!

“Oh... I suppose we could just skip to the experiment.”

Dam, she must be horny as hell.

“Where would you like me to be?”

“Over there on the slab looks fine.” She points her hoof at the odd contraption. “Spike, get some restraints down here!”

“Well... this is getting even better by the minute” you mumble to yourself.

Spike brings down the straps.

“Oh.. could you...?”

“Yea yea” Spike starts tying you with the restraints to the cold metal slab.

“Thanks Spike.” She leans in and kisses the dragon on his cheek. As he leaves, you excite yourself to have her finally to yourself.

“So... what shall we start with?”

“How about a littl-”

“The saw!” Twilight levitates a tray of tools over your head, settling them down on a cart next to you.

“Wait... what are you doing, Twilight?”

“Experimenting for science!”

Author's Note:

This may be one of them.

Comments

[zel]

What... Did I just read?

[CanterlotGuardian]

I love it. Like for serious. I love it.

[TwizzleDragon]

1971040 The Scientist.

[Dusty Sage]

Usually a rous is spelled "ruse," but maybe you did that to throw us off.

Upward thumb for sheer audacity.

[Neko-sama]

Come up to meet you, tell you I'm sorry
You don't know how lovely you are
I had to find you, tell you I need you
Tell you I set you apart

Tell me your secrets and ask me your questions
Oh, let's go back to the start
Running in circles, coming up tails
Heads on a science apart

Nobody said it was easy
It's such a shame for us to part
Nobody said it was easy
No one ever said it would be this hard
Oh, take me back to the start

I was just guessing at numbers and figures
Pulling the puzzles apart
Questions of science, science and progress
Do not speak as loud as my heart

But tell me you love me, come back and haunt me
Oh and I rush to the start
Running in circles, chasing our tails
Coming back as we are

Nobody said it was easy
Oh, it's such a shame for us to part
Nobody said it was easy
No one ever said it would be so hard
I'm going back to the start

Oh ooh, ooh ooh ooh ooh
Ah ooh, ooh ooh ooh ooh
Oh ooh, ooh ooh ooh ooh
Oh ooh, ooh ooh ooh ooh

[TrevorLaneRay]

Well that was a refreshing detour.

[GeodesicDragon]

Well that was random.

... oh wait, I like random.

[Harmonic Revelations]

Note to self: When you click on something tagged "Random" you never know what you're getting into.

Luckily I like what I got into.

Fav + Liked it.

[octavia1997]

I am scared. Why would you make this ct

[sharpshadow]

Vivisection!

[Monkey3000]

Crazy twilight is best twilight!

[themultiversewatcher]

Here's Pony Waifu.

I know it features RD, but I suppose you could imagine its Twilight.

[Multitraveler]

1998968
Just yes.

[Multitraveler]

This is pretty creepy. I kinda like creepy. Good job. I'ma just sit here and listen to coldplay now.
EVERYBODY DO THE CLOP!!! asdf references. asdf references everywhere. ALL THE REFERENCES! I don't always do references, but when I do. They look like this. Bro, do you even reference?

[octavia1997]

hold the fuck on. you wrote this twissle?! oh my fucking god. didn't even notice that at all

wow all the mind fucks.

you should make more like this, but less, "SEX!" and more like (he wispered) "my pinis is ready. prepair your anis"

[afterceasetoexist]

wut