Angels in Equestria

by ArguingPizza

Chick Flick

In an age long past from Equestria, mages renowned for their skill and power dotted Equestria. In those wild days, it was seen as much more important for Unicorns to cultivate their gift; as the only pony species able to openly wield magic, they were often looked to in the darkest of days for the solutions to early Equestria’s problems

However, even mages have off days. Days where everything seems to go wrong, and not even the most basic of things will cooperate. Days when doorknobs seem extra slippery, when cups seem to kiss the floor with the passion of long-lost lovers, when you just can’t find your favorite pair of shoes. Days that just piss you off from dawn to dusk.

During those times, the powerful spellcasters would exile themselves until their minds returned to calm and balance. Unicorn magic is vulnerable to emotional currents, and the wrong thought during the wrong spell could have dangerous results. The more powerful the mage, the more remote the exile. Eventually, it became a point of pride how far away one’s refuge was from civilization. Star Swirl the Bearded’s refuge, though never definitively uncovered, was rumored to be the Moon itself. Luna’s blessing allowed the arcane master to keep himself from harming a soul during his, thankfully few, bad days.

After my encounter with the Element Bearers, I considered following in his hoofsteps and stepping through Reality to touch the white surface of the satellite. It was certainly calm and peaceful, perhaps more so than anywhere else in Creation, bar the Heavens themselves. Stewardship by and Alicorn tends to have that effect.

However, I realized halfway through that thought that ‘Calm’ and ‘Peaceful’ were never really my style. Too boring. So I chose something a little more….me.

Literally.

“Hello, Uncle.” Celestia’s voice cut through the raging Plasma Storm that was the surface of the Sun. I opened my eyes and glanced over across the roaring fires.

Celestia stood in a circle of controlled chaos. Fire hotter than the radioactive furnace of a planet’s core bent to her will as if it were a dog being taught to fetch. Solar Flares burst to life and died at her command as she strode calmly across the six thousand degree surface as if it was no warmer than the grass in a shady meadow.

“Hello, Celly. Come to scold me for not befriending your little minions?” I snarked. Celestia ignored my quip and simply lowered herself beside me. I decided not to push myself up. I was on my back with my arms behind my head, and there was a nice little micro current of heat under my back that felt like a jet on a Jacuzzi, so I was reluctant to give up my spot.

Celestia said nothing for a few moments. As I watched her, she looked at the boiling surface we relaxed upon with a motherly smile. Her hoof toyed with a microflare like it was an infant’s hand. The superheated gas rolled across her pristine white fur as a puppy’s tongue would.

“I was going to, at first.” I raised an eyebrow.

“What changed?” With her free hoof, she gestured around lazily.

“You came here. I talked to Twilight, and when I felt your presence here I connected the dots. I would have brought Luna along as well, but….” Celestia trailed off and glanced sheepishly at the sun.

“Ah, yes. Never did like old Lulu, did she. Moody little brat,” I said as I patted the sun warmly. The star rumbled at my words, but the current on my back didn’t waver.

“Well, you know how stars are.” I did. The balls of fire were just as moody as their nature suggested. Not to say they were cruel or monstrous, just that, being the biggest things in the universe short of their big brothers Black Holes, they tended to have a bit of an ego. Still, Celestia’s was usually quite the sweetheart.

She never did like Luna though.

We sat together in silence after that, simply basking in the radioactive heat of the sun. It was refreshing, and at one point I caught myself dozing. I smirked at the thought. Of course a normal bed wouldn’t have sufficed; oh no, I apparently needed an entire star to fall asleep.

It was Celestia who broke the silence, because of course it was.

“What happened?” she asked.

I didn’t open my eyes. “What do you mean?” I asked innocently, and could almost feel her roll her eyes.

“You know what I mean. If you came here to deal with Discord, you would have done it the moment you arrived instead of piddling around while he broke his bonds. You may have Luna convinced, but I know Discord was just a side note to your visit.” Damn girl. Always was too smart for her own good. Too perceptive, too much like her mother. “So I’ll ask again; what happened?”

I sighed and sat up. I definitely wasn’t going to be able to relax until Celestia was satisfied, so it wasn’t worth the effort to even bother trying.

“I was with the Second Host, guarding the River of Souls. Panamay was called away so I had taken his spot on the rotation. We were nearing the end of our century long deployment, and the Third Host was preparing to relieve us. It had been relatively quiet, not too many assaults on the River and not for nearly a decade. I don’t know how, but the Hellspawn caught us flat-footed. Somehow they bypassed our sentries and detection wards. Before we knew it, they were among us.” I shook my head to keep from falling into the memory. Celestia said nothing beside me, preferring instead to place a white wing over my own for comfort.

I stopped and took a breath. “There were so many, and they were drunk on bloodlust, far more than normal. Even the High Demons were going berserk. We were outnumbered and out of formation. I haven’t seen fighting so desperate since the First Day. There were Hellspawn in the River, snatching Souls and tearing them apart. Their screams…my God Celestia their screams….” The wing tightened around me and I smiled sadly at my niece’s attempts to sooth me. I put my arm over her withers.

“Angels were falling left and right and leaving mountains of monster corpses as memorials, but they didn’t stop. If Gabriel hadn’t personally intervened, we’d have been overrun and I’d be dead right now. Most of the Second Host is gone as is.”

Celestia remained silent. There was nothing to say. I gripped her tighter, taking solace in the feeling of her against my side.

“Afterwards, I had to get away. I needed to see you girls, make sure you were safe.” Celestia rested her head on my shoulder, and together we stared into the starry abyss. And for a while, I was content.

…

But then I got bored.

I know, I know. Way to ruin the moment, right? But what can I say, I love my nieces more than anything, but I still need something to keep my mind occupied.

“Okay, chick flick emotional moment is over,” I said as I stood up and stretched. Celestia rolled her eyes and snorted.

“You always know how to kill a mood, don’t you?” I flashed her a mischievous grin as I popped my back. Celestia shivered and I laughed; she always hated it when I did that, which was of course the only reason I did it in the first place.

Then a thought crossed my mind.

“Hey Celly…” I asked in my sweetest voice. Celestia froze and looked at me with distrustful eyes.

“What do you want?”

I grinned.

---

The Badlands are the desert wastelands that span the continent south of Equestria. Past the most isolated Buffalo settlement, the climate is so hot and dry it essentially renders the geography uninhabitable.

At least, uninhabitable to most creatures. One species that thrives in the wastelands are the Changelings. Insectoid and weak fighters, the heat and desolation protect them from their enemies, and their large underground complexes protect them from the heat.

Deep underground, in the center of the Hive, there is a massive, opulent chamber. Green-tinted magic torches give off warm light, and the rough dirt walls are surfaced with gem-encrusted stone. What pleasures Changelings desire adorn the room in spades, and a steady stream of servants ensure the lone occupant need never want for anything.

To say that Queen Chrysalis lived a life of luxury is to say that a volcanic eruption is mildly startling.

The Queen’s first warning of my arrival was the flicker of the torches. They pulsed in unison, their sickly green flame morphing across the color spectrum before settling on white. The fires then seemed to evaporate, breaking apart into tens of thousands of individual specks that floated off their wicks. The lights swirled and danced in an intangible wind. Their graceful waltz slowly brought them together to form a geyser of sparkles.

The frothing pillar rose from the floor to form a roughly bipedal shape. As the sparks churned and settled, details began to appear. Two distinct arms, a hood overhanging the head, smooth armor plating.

The final motes faded to nothing around me as I gazed upon Chrysalis who sat frozen on an overstuffed cushion. Her mouth hung open and her eyes were wide. I raised my hand to my face, and with a snap of my fingers, I collapsed every tunnel entrance that led into the chamber.

“How dare you! What manner of beast are you? To storm into my own Palace and demolish my-“ I clenched my hand and sealed her mouth tightly. The anger that had been rising in the Queen was quickly replaced by panic as she ignited her horn to no affect. She pushed herself to her ragged, hole ridden hooves. I scowled and forced her back to her stomach.

Moving for the first time since my entrance, I approached her with apathy. My armored boots echoed on the cold stone tile as I circled her with disinterest. I could feel her struggling against the invisible chains I had placed on her, but I gave no indication. I wanted her to stew for a while.

As I walked, I picked up a few trinkets and knickknacks from around the room and examined them with disinterest. A decorative lamp, a bowl of fruit I’m almost entirely sure was decorative. On the far side of the collapse, I heard the faint sounds of scraping. The Changelings trying to dig out their Queen. I was sure Chrysalis couldn’t hear it, not yet, but just to be safe I threw up a sound buffer around the tunnel exits. I didn’t want Chrysalis anything to focus on except myself.

After a few minutes, I stopped my self-guided tour and squatted down in front of Chrysalis.

“We’ve got a problem, you and I,” I started off calmly, as if I was about to lightly scold a child. “See, you recently made the grave mistake of fucking with a pair, or I guess a trio, of alicorns I’m rather fond of.” Her eyes swelled, whether in shock or fear I don’t know.

“Yeah, now you remember. I bet you thought you were pretty clever, right?” I asked jokingly, “Replacing Cadence’s fiancé and infiltrating the capitol. I mean hell, you fed so much you overpowered the Princess of the Sun! Pretty impressive. But,” I held up one finger, and all my joviality disappeared.

“You didn’t know you were pissing me off. And that’s a very, very bad mistake to make. So I am giving you exactly one warning. One.” I stood and took a step back and snapped my wings out aggressively. Light poured forth from my body, filling the room with brightness and unbearable heat. From under my hood, two bright blue eyes shone out of the dark, the only darkness left in the room. I drew Nameless and put the tip to her throat.

“If you ever step a single, disgusting hoof in Equestria for even a second, I will come back here and flay alive every single one of your bastardized species. I will make you watch as I tear the chitin from them, and when the last of their screams have drifted away on the wind, I’ll turn to you.” It took a bit of concentration, but I was able to open a small portal.

A three inch tear in the Mortal Membrane opened, and on the other side was Hell. The one-way window allowed Chrysalis a view into the darkest corner of Creation, and the look in her eyes became unmitigated terror. The images she was seeing were filtered, I didn’t want her committing suicide the moment I released her bonds. What she saw was just enough to surpass anything her imagination could have thought of in a thousand lifetimes, but not quite enough to destroy her will to live.

After only a few seconds I closed the window and released the bonds holding her. The Changeling Queen didn’t move, she was frozen in absolute horror. I slowly and deliberately leaned down and whispered in her ear.

“If you even think of so much as touching my nieces again, I will make the rest of your existence a thousand times worse.”

I stood and Feathered out without another word.

When I reappeared in Luna’s bedroom my laughter blew out every window in the castle.

Comments

[ArguingPizza]

2965730
I wanted to post this as soon as I read your comment, but I couldn't get it right until now. Hopefully the longest chapter so far is a good consolation prize

And yep, there is a mobile version.
Fourth down on the FAQ

[vinilscratchedmynose]

Soooo! Gud!.......Nuf sed.....!LoL!

[Spiderman here]

Well since the author is dead time to move on! i.imgur.com/17qKlBT.gif

[ArguingPizza]

3186440
Nope, not dead. Not focusing on this story at the moment, but not dead and still active. I haven't marked this story as 'On Hiatus' for a reason

[Spiderman here]

3186447 Taco bell is the place where men can cry mainly tears. encrypted-tbn1.gstatic.com/images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQXJwvWwRdRNAPN2lR6KOHu2F2hi9kehscxwirs_lwBcyAu_j9s

[Alpha777]

3186447 Why did you cancelled it?

[Bronzer]

Now that is a threat!