Angels in Equestria

by ArguingPizza

Accidental Invasions

Canterlot was probably in an uproar. Maybe.

Now, I understand it might be hard to understand why I wasn't completely sure. It sounds like it would be easy to tell when an entire city is going bananas. But, considering the fact that I've spent most of my existence covered in demon blood on the Battleground Plain of Purgatory. I think my unfamiliarity with judging the emotional states of ponies is excusable.

I was completely sure that they were excited over something, with all the running around and yelling. I was just having a bit of difficulty determining if it was the good kind of excited or the-

A pony threw a spear at me. A pony. Threw. A spear. At ME.

Probably the bad kind, then. Was it something I said?

“Halt! Foul creature, submit yourself!” cried one of the golden armored stallions. I couldn't help but think that their armor was probably a lot less durable than mine.

The guard's shout seemed to invigorate his comrades, and almost immediately I found myself surrounded by a dozen white and gray armored ponies, which led me to believe that it was, in fact, something I said. The fact that I hadn't said a word since touching down and deciding to take a stroll through the city was irrelevant.

At that moment, the idea that I was surrounded by a dozen, gilded, completely serious pony soldiers struck me. The long, riotous laughter that I unleashed seemed to unnerve them. Apparently, near seven-feet tall Shining Heavenly Warriors dropping in and rolling around on the ground laughing wasn't covered in their training.

Its not really their fault. Had I been almost anyone else, their little show of strength probably would have intimidated me. A dozen burly, stern-faced stallions is, objectively, a very compelling sight.

But, taking into account the whole 'Soldier of Heaven' thing(another perk of being an angel; all your titles kick ass), and the fact that even the tallest guard barely reached my waist, the whole thing seemed more adorable than anything. Like a swarm of kittens who try to attack a puppy, armed only with hugs.

Sadly, my laughter was brought to an abrupt end when a unicorn guard worked up the courage to try to subdue me through magic. What followed is exactly what you'd expect from anyone with combat reflexes honed through innumerable years of war. The fact that the guards survived at all is a remarkable show of restraint on my part.

When the light faded, I stood and looked around. Everywhere around me, the streets were littered with ponies who had been caught up in my......not quite attack, but something close. They were all alive and laying unconscious on the ground. I sighed sadly. All I wanted to do was take a pleasant stroll through the city. These ponies really need to get out more, learn not to panic at everything.

I realized the same thing would probably happen all the way through the city, so I unfurled my wings and took to the air. Faster than lighting, I soared through the sky. Less than a full second later, I touched down gently in the center courtyard of the Palace. The door guards snapped their eyes to me and tensed to attack, but before they could move an inch I appeared between them. I gently rested my hands on their foreheads and passed a thought through their heads, commanding them to sleep. With two identical thumps, both slumped to the floor. Just for kicks, I made sure their dreams would be about each other and of a type not to be discussed in polite company.

I strode forward and willed the doors out of my way. I realized I had used a bit too much force when the doors exploded off their heavy hinges and shattered against a pair of support columns. Another cool thing about being an angel: the epic entrances.

The chamber I entered was empty except for another pair of guards who quickly joined their comrades in dreamland, though this time without the awkwardness-inducing scenarios. A single gold-trimmed red carpet led directly to another set of almost identical doors. I stopped in front of them for a moment to gauge my own strength. Although it looked cool, ripping doors off hinges in someone else's home was generally considered rude, and considering who I was coming to see, I would have preferred to avoid that.

Before I could resume my journey and open the door, I heard voices coming from the other side. They were muffled, but they seemed rushed, and maybe a little bit panicked.

I decided waiting would only make the situation worse(also I was getting bored, which is never a good thing for me), and I gently pushed the doors open, this time with my real physical hands. However, it seemed Fate wanted me to appear as rude and intimidating as possible, and the doors once again snapped off their hinges. At least the second time they didn't shatter completely.

On the other side of the doors was a long room with an extremely high ceiling. Stained glass windows made up most of the walls, each depicting a different scene. In the center of the far end of the room there stood a dais topped with a large throne. In front of the dais a half dozen ponies whirled their heads around to look at me.

And every single one of them looked terrified out of their fucking minds.

All six suddenly bolted towards the far end of the room, where they immediately tried to hide behind a larger, white-

“UNCLE CORNELIUS!!!!!” Before I could even take a step into the room, I was tackled to the ground by a white blur. I found myself on my back looking up into a massive smile and a pair of sparkling magenta eyes.

I sighed happily. “Hello, Celly. I take it you missed me?” Celestia didn't answer, but proceeded to give me a bone-crunching hug. After a few moments she released me and began to hop in place. All of this took place with her still standing on top of me.

“OHMYMOMYOU'REHEREYOU'REREALLYREALLYREALLYHEREFORREALLYREAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!” What followed was easily in the top five most adorable squee sounds in the history of my existence. I simply couldn't help myself when I grabbed her in a hug of my own and jumped to my feet. Celestia giggled as if it was a carnival ride, just like a foal would.

After a few moments, Celestia seemed to remember the other ponies in the room, and her stark white coat blushed a furious red. She coughed a few times and attempted to straighten herself out before taking a step(mind you an extremely small one) away from me.

While Celestia was trying to compose herself, I looked towards the half dozen ponies who had attempted to take shelter behind her. They were all standing stock still and staring at the two of us like we'd suddenly grown Demon heads out of our chests and started singing Brittney Spears.

Celestia shuffled her feet a bit. “Um.....girls, I'd like you to meet my Uncle Cornelius.” Celestia gave a nervous smile, clearly embarrassed about her behavior. I gave a small wave.

Apparently, the combination of an earth-shattering explosion, a(completely unintentional) storming of Canterlot, a large and heavily armed Angel, and their regal Princess acting like a foal on Hearth's Warming was too much for the poor little ponies.

All six fainted, and I swear I tried to catch them. I just didn't try very hard.

So, tell me what you think of this chapter and, as always, constructive criticism is always welcome.

Comments

[end my life]

This is awesome!

[Aizen]

4.bp.blogspot.com/-6DPlY40DLE8/TekC9DSPXTI/AAAAAAAAAVY/JeW-PVtljVA/s1600/moar_23.jpg

[ArguingPizza]

1599901
Yeah unfortunately I can't see what that image is.

[Aizen]

I have some problems with net. Later i will try to chang it. what i wanted to ask was: "Can i have some more??"

[SomeRandomTwat]

MOAR!!!!

[WOWtrooper]

media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mcnf4lxRLa1r993fw.gif
i like it so far but Cornelius seams a bit OP
also that reaction from Celestia she was all likemedia.tumblr.com/tumblr_mdc6t2qMIC1ryk98i.gif

[Mysterious Stranger]

Surprise! They're related. I really like the comedy in this story. Being inside of Cornelius' mind is fun.

[Dergmann]

I feel the need to split a few hairs. Now, this angel here is apparently seven feet tall. With a forty foot wingspan. That seems, to my humble self, a tad excessive. I know you were probably trying to shoot for the impressive, but my poor will can only suspend so much disbelief. Other than that, Ive had a few chuckles at these first two chapters, and so shall continue reading.

[1st Lieutenant Dave]

All six fainted, and I swear I tried to catch them. I just didn't try very hard.

Wow that sounded really lazy, but eh Im lazy to

[InfinityHunter]

I loved it.

[Bronzer]

Had I been almost anyone else, their little show of strength probably would have intimidated me.

Now I know you're just trying to be polite.

Just for kicks, I made sure their dreams would be about each other and of a type not to be discussed in polite company.

You're sure you're from Heaven, right?