Rape, sexism, racism, vile acts and views that humanity looks at with deepest of loathing. But Equestria a magical world inhabited by ponies, have no such issue openly embracing it.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Awe-some! That is the only way I can describe it!
OH SHIT
Nice chapter
HOLY SHIT! Dude almost killed Big Mac. Now they think he's a monster? That's messed up. Great Chapter though.
Nightmare's probably preggers or in love and by god I'm pissed off at Ponyville. And now I'm gonna have to wait a month for Demo to get the
Halo out of his system long enough to continue the fic..... shit.
wow poor bastard
Those meany pants!
All he did was an act of rage because the one he loved got hurt! He is not a monster, but rather Big Mac is the true monster.
Now look where that got the human, in the hooves of Chrysalis and Nightmare Moon!
1552191 Do you read the Story "Man of War" or "My Better life" ? because i have seen your name before
im sad now
update and make me happy
So Chrysalis looks like this:
Dark grey fur, green dress, sharpened fingers, long dark green hair with holes in it, a sharp horn partially hidden by the hair, thin arms and waist compared to her chest and thighs, and natural green chitin armor on her back.
Does that about cover it?
1552455 i feel a disturbance in the force, as if millions of hopes were crying out and silenced.
1553530
i.qkme.me/3po3hx.jpg
So, I'm not the only one who felt it
1553570 it seems not my lord
Well... We all know where this is going.
Hmm, you made this quite interesting now, to my suprise. You have shown the barbaric and cruel side of humans with Lachlan acting out on Big Mac whcih the citizens of Ponyville were shocked as much as to avoid being him do to his human nature, really showed who were truly friends with Lachlan to begin with (oddly enough only Big Mac can be considered as his true friend). This chapter has shown internal struggles as how our poor hero is overwhelmed with isolation and bitterness (due to him being a sociable creature after-all), making it surprising dark and tragic.
So I have to say to you, kudos my man, fricking kudos indeed. You have pressed this fic into new territory where no mere HiE would dare to go, thus having me more hooked into your story due to change of atmosphere (quite a refreshing change). Besides format errors and grammar, really good work. I'll be favoring this fic due to such development you have done. Best of wishes man and hope you have a good weekend. Best regards.
Some parts made me laugh. I liked it, over all. The little fear, HiE exploration, and conflict. Will wait for the next one.
They all fear him and hate him!? No love for him anymore.
Still.....Richard.....
i605.photobucket.com/albums/tt133/jjholt_2009/Memes/yougonnagetraped-spongebob.jpg
You gotta be kidding me! ⊙.⊙
Very interesting turn in the story. I find it unexpected, that all ponies turned away from Lachlan. Especially Dash, it's against her element.
I have also question the further development of the story.
1. Divert Chrysalis, Lachlan into changeling´s hive? I am interested in the possibility of meeting with changeling´s mares.
2. Will in story females of in other races? For example gryffins or diamond dogs.
1554547 yes and the reason that the girls have left him is because of nightmare moon she has leaked foul magic amplifying there fear and prejudge views
this chpter made my cry becus ive ben in his situation just with out ponys and sex
thay just stoped liking me still cant think of why but thi is going grate chapter 6
9 out of 10 so far
Let us hope that Zecora saw Nightmare Moon and Chrysalis kidnapping Lachlan. She can warren Mane 6 what has happens and reminds that they should not judge a book by its cover as they did to her, reminding them of all the good things Lachlan did and they should not turn their backs their friend because he can eat meat.
Zecora lived Everfree Forest and knows allot about many different creatures that live there, she can also explain to Mane 6 what an Omnivore is and some Predators are highly protective of their mates, willing kill or even sacrificing themselves to protect their mate from great harm.
1554589 That explains why they dont run around like idiots when a Griffin is around cause technically he's an Omnivore and Griffins are carnivores so they have more reason to fear Griffins than they do him
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This is what the mane six look like but far bigger breasts XD>>1554782
Sadly no they are not. In this fic Griffons are not carnivorous and are more accustomed to eating fish and berries which is not a big deal as Fluttershy feeds a couple of ferrets fish in one episode
K can we see the main character become (gasp) EVIL
1554589 So, speaking of non-pony females and griffons, does this mean our hero is going to eventually tap Gilda?
1554978 yeah prob
I hope it's some magic influence that amplified his strength to the point where he could beat a giant work horse. It would make sense, since it's also outside influence that makes them afraid of him now. The alternative - that, for some reason, he's just that powerful on his own - makes very very little.
you can't just pack up and not post another chapter until you get halo out of your system. that will take for ever
1554547>>1554589
Well It is not surprising if one thinks about. Look at "Fall Weather Friends" where Applejack wasn't being "honest" about racing in the "Running of the Leaves" race as how Rainbow Dash herself wasn't completely "Loyal" at that time. I would like to think they aren't necessarily the embodiment of The Elements of Harmony, but rather Holders of Harmony at a given time. I can list other episodes that can help support this case but it'll stretch too long.
Also it seems that Ponies will run from everything, from stampedes of Cows to a stampede of little bunnies, but hey if somehow Nightmare Moon is all behind this then I'm cool with it (I guess). I bet my money that the Hero will go back to Ponyville, but things wont be same as they were before.
1555542 don't worry everyone as we speak I am writing another chapter and with me having college means that aI can use most of my breaks to continue this story so Never fear when the christmas breaks hit I will be able to post more regularly but at the moment one chapter every couple of days K
holy shit!! I wasn't expecting ponyviile to abandom him, even fluttershy!!...still I can't wait to see else you have in store for him, maybe a daring escape and shacking up with Zecora, since they both are shunned, and she wasn't there when he tried to kill big mac? either way I can't wait for another chapter,so you rock, woohoo
Next chapter, the first fail of Nightmare Moon and Chrysalis when Zecora enter to the rescue.
Also, their something that I keep asking.
1) Why did he didn't go to Zecora strait a head? He said she was a very good friend.
2) Is Nightmare Moon pregnant? In the chapter you said she almost get knot out but she manage to stop the sperm before reacher her. But in this chapter she continue to act like she is pregnant. I confuse.
3) Why didn't Big Mac talk with her sister or any other mare? He clearly see that Lachlan is fine. I know, I know, the spell of Nightmare Moon, but still I pretty sure he will start notice something strange is happening with her sister.
And finally and this only a suggestion, I think I will be kind of funny if Chrysalis and NM reach multiples orgasms but Lachlan never release anything, and when he is about to come Zecora rescue him and they both escape, while NM and Chrysalis can barely move and can't cast any spells
Just a little observation I have made:
The intercourse scenes are to short. The build up to the scene is good, the foreplay okay, but when the fireworks then are surposed to starts, its over before the first rocket reaches the sky. Try to be more discriptive even though he's the strongest in the battle of the sexest he must still feel somthing.
"Xenophilia" and "Gentleman for Mares" are good refrence points. Of course if he dosn't really feel anything that's okay, but the story dosn't give us any indications of this.
Al that been said keep up the good work and I'm looking forward to see how he and the ponies become friends again.
1560556 being honest mate sady ponies in this are pretty shit in bed and whilst this is a clop fic i don't want to bore people to death with ike 3000 words about the sex scene as the story progresses there will be longer scenes
1560789
It's more that a lot of the chapters are building up to that, and then when we get there its a frw line. Its a bit like a story were we really spend time building up to a great confrontation and the when we get there it just says "and the hero won.".
But this is your story and looking at the likes and views it has your not doing to shaby.
Just whanted to point out a weakness as I saw it.
Keep up the good work and looking forward to the next chapter.
1560983 i'm glad you did I am always trying to improve and people showing me where I go wrong is how I get better thank you and the next chapter will have a far longer clop scene though it will continue on from chapter 5 with nightmare Moon also sadly no clop scene with Chrysalis = ( this chapter
1555290
Not so much, a severe burst of adrenaline plus a triggering of basic survival instinct can contribute to his abnormal strength. Adrenaline can push the human body to another level of strength and agility, then when pure survival/hunting instinct kicks in, certain limitations are removed, the body is simply fighting to survive with as little injury as possible and diverts away a certain amount of pain from the overexertion of muscles or the over-extension of joints. Basically, get a person angry enough, and they can do just about what lachlan did.
Demorgorgon can lachan become a bad guy because that would be cool and that would allow you to link royal wedding episode by chrisalis wanting a royal wedding
1552371
He didn't go to the hospital. They should really tell him that they're more afraid of how he was trying to beat Big Mac down.
1554589
Huh, I didn't see a hint of that.
Well that was totally a Wham Episode and Mood Whiplash for me, I mean first it was wacky hiijinks of the mares that want some human dude. Now all of this drama happens when he lost when it was Big Mac that attacked him. I guess I can understand why Nightmare Moon is making them afraid, I guess she was lying about him coming to her when she was pretty much on her way here to get him. This is a very good story so far, I wonder how the latest chapter will go now.
That is my name WTF!!!!
I am so I don't even know?
1554785 Link please
Chrysalis, eh?
Anybody recognize this song?
-
Still has issues with punctuation.
1554785 *looks at picture* O.O
*Distrubance is felt in my pants* XD
Was I the only one thinking this while Lachlan was chased and fought Big Mac?
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1823732 nope i had a very similar thought although i was thinking more along the line of the hulk
The punishment for beating up a stallion death by snow snow which is man on man
OH NO OH GOD NO WHYYYYYYYYHYYYYYYYYYYYYY
2370622 Or Poontah, Poontah is an exceptable punishment too, lol
the spirit is willing, but the flesh is spongy and bruised.
Man I was thinking this right before i read this. Fukkin hilarious. was wondering when it would come into play cuz it would be impossible not to have this line in a fic like this.
Well.
Shit.
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