A large, flippered marine mammal native to northern arctic regions.
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Long ago, when the Mare in the Moon still hung in the sky, the Everfree Forest was far larger and far less forgiving. When a supernatural force lures his friend into the ancient forest, threatening to steal her away forever, a young foal must venture inside and confront a terrifying evil.
This story is loosely based on A Short Trip Home by F. Scott Fitzgerald. If you enjoy it, I encourage you to read the original.
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Review: https://www.fimfiction.net/group/217075/ai-reviews/thread/526260/night-of-the-autumn-moon-by-davidfosterwalrus85-10
This story deserves more views.
A vengeful ghost of a horrid beaky who prolly ATE that filly all those years ago!
Can't trust them dang beakies, I tell ya! Even when they're dead!
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Thank you very much! I appreciate you reading and boosting it, and the review was great!
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If you have questions/thoughts/etc, don't hesitate to comment on said review.
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Certainly. I did have a couple of follow-up questions I posted in the thread. This is actually a really neat tool, I might make a habit of submitting some more stuff to Claude in the future.
This is a really good horror. Excellent case of atmosphere and unease over shock. Nicely descriptive and hits the "old classic" tone well.
As to the story, I have a hypothesis.
I think the gryphon probably wasn't a murderer and was likely friends with the missing filly, who succumbed to the forest by happenstance. "Extracted a confession and dealt with" can easily equate to "tortured until they said what we wanted to hear, then murdered". The resulting bad feelings all around and restless spirit probably caused the curse with the gryphon trying to seek revenge. With the careful treatment of his remains later it feels like an apology, almost.
Whether I'm way off the mark or not, it's a great read!
Great story. Really liked the eerie atmosphere created in the hut scene. Nice pacing and good work having the story develop naturally.
Wow..... This story has the quality of a book in a New York Times bestseller list. I knew that this story is special when I saw the cover art and I wasn't wrong. I am breathtaken. The choice of words, excellent and always supporting the mood, the subtle horror, that feels like it's crawling under your skin. I have seen some incredible writing here in the last 10+ years, but this story surpasses everything I've read here before.
You are up there among the greatest authors in history with this story. I wish I could favourite this story twice.
I enjoyed this. Oddly enough, I don't have a bunch of in-depth critique to offer (hence the late comment), and whether that's a result of the story being overall quite solid or my sick-addled brain being dull, I can't say. I'm not familiar with the source material, so I don't know how derivative this piece is or isn't. Either way, it stands just fine on its own, which is important for this kind of thing. The story being set in the past works well within the series canon, and I felt the choice of narrator was successful. The diction and tone felt appropriate for a character who I felt was middle-aged or old, recounting a story from his youth.
The fun part is you can speculate if the supernatural stuff actually happened given the setting, or if it was his and Amber's childish imaginations manifesting this. I like to think something regarding the latter half of this speculation is true, and even if he still doesn't truly believe it, that's how he'd tell the story to children. A couple of touches I liked was his an Amber's connection/relationship that persisted after the story's conclusion, and is a nice bittersweet note to end on. The random detail that jumped out at me was burs. I used to live right by a forest when I was a kid, and I remember needing to get burs off my dogs' coats after walks. Do burs cling to horse hair like they do with dog fur? I genuinely don't know.
Anyway, I had fun reading. Thanks for the recommendation.