• Member Since 16th Jun, 2023
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(they/them) writing about ponies kissing and hugging and making terrible mistakes (pfp by evelili! https://evelili.tumblr.com/post/731980670351622144/free-icons-for-u-nd-ur-partner-in-crime )


There's no way that the eternal student, Twilight Sparkle, would ever just walk up to the object of her affections and confess her love without preparation, right? So when she shows up at Rarity's doorstep, frazzled and out of sorts, to ask about love of all things, Rarity knows what she needs is to be taught. Of course, Rarity's no Princess, but she knows a thing or two about romance, so what else can the Element of Generosity do but offer lessons?

A couple pretend dates and some pretend kissing will give Twilight the knowledge and confidence she needs to ask her prospective special somepony out... But who is this mystery mare, anyway?

Chapters (5)
Comments ( 66 )

Very interested in this - you've written Rarity & Twilight's dynamic really well and I like your use of metaphor.

Enjoying this so far. Your writing style is fun to read and really helps to bring the scenes alive. :twilightsmile: Looking forward to more.

Interesting start. Will keep an eye to see where this story goes.

I’m immediately in love with this. I want more. I hope things go well for the both of them. (Secretly wishing, Rarity pls pls pls actually take Twi on a date, I can just imagine her getting flustered at “kisses to gentlemares”)

Also, hello, your writing??!!! The words? I’m so in love. They just flow across the page and they are so enriching and enchanting. You write Rarity’s character so well, and Twilight’s personality perfectly compliments it. I read the Fluttershy fic you wrote, glad there’s more from you.

Hmm. This story is in the sinbox, and also good. It's nice when both of those things happen to the same story.

Rarilight, on my fimfiction.net? It's more likely than you think!

Neat so far. The surprise, eager teacher, and the reluctant but "oh no it's actually what I want but not how I planned TWILIGHT.EXE HAS ENCOUNTER A CRITICAL ERROR" student. Eager to see how this plays out.

This is gay.

I approve.

Pls write more.

Wanna know the best part?
It's going to get even gayer.

That is truly the best part.
(I’ve recently fallen in love with Rarilight b/c of Monochromatic’s works, never knew it was a ship before. Why is it so perfect tho?!!!)

Honestly, Twilight can work well with anypony else from the mane six. Maybe we should call her ship-horse instead of book-horse.

Maybe we should 🤣. Seriously though, she works with everyone. I never knew Twijack and Twishy were a thing but some people can write it well, and I knew TwiPie only after seeing fics because of the Trivia Trot episode. I had a Twidash phase, and ppl can write Rarilight romance so good, it’s jaw-droppingly amazing in execution. Every fandom and franchise has its flaws, and some people may get a bit too crazy about ships, but damn, one thing we can do pretty damn well is write ships.

LOL, I went through a TwiDash when I first found this site. Still one of my favorite ships in the fandom.

Definitely still one of my favorite ships. Purely from nostalgia. It literally shaped me into who I am. I started getting into fanfics in middle school, and I was a sucker for the Twidash Scootadopt fics. (RD my childhood fave, and Scoots my fave CMC because I saw myself in her a lot and related to her). I dreamt about the fics and made my own versions of that concept (me dreaming is how I got the ideas for 90% of my fics after all, and this was the start of my fanfic writing journey rabbit-hole among dreaming fanfics for other fandoms). A couple years later and I turned those dreams into written fanfics, posted them on AO3, and writing helped me heal over irl problems throughout the years. So I can pretty much say Twidash helped save my life.

Glad to hear. I might get very, very frustrated with this fandom from time to time, so it's always nice to hear the good its done for people.

Thank you for taking the time to read my comments and reply :twilightblush::twilightsmile:
Yeah, I’m very grateful to this fandom. I’ve had really bad years and some fanfics that ended in ppl/ponies not ending themselves and healing really helped me. I still revisit them from time to time as thanks.

thanks for the comments everyone! i have to resist the temptation to just post the next chapter immediately... gotta be strong so i can build up more of a buffer

WHO TOLD YOU. who's leaking my plot plans

big monochromatic fan too, i've actually got a wip fic for TEL i wanna sling up here in the next couple weeks!
also re: twidash i HAVE been playing with the idea of writing some raridash. specifically because i've been craving some messy comphet rarity...

Oooh some more interesting story ideas ~
Yesss Mono Rarilight is so good, I can’t come up with enough words to praise it.

Rarity's narration here is amazing. You captured her voice and mannerisms soooo well. Absolutely fabulous, darling :raritywink:

excuse my fangirling
Can I inhale this writing
can I kiss it like rarity does

Mmmmm the descriptions
So good
Mmm need more horse words
Ahhhhhatshshgshsh I need to know how Rarity feels

No you can’t do this to me, you can’t just leave it off here, not now, no no no…

I must have more, this is one of the only ship fics where:
A. The relationship had weight and tension that I personally cared about.
B. The relationship isn’t forced at bucking all, unless you count the off-screen crush but I don’t. This actually feels natural, and the awkwardness feels like it was cooked to perfection. I literally can’t find words to describe this fic, it’s too good, deserves a ‘featured’ like yesterday.

Okay, I need to take a deep breath and let the inner Dipper out of my system, because fanboying is pretty exhausting(?) it turns out.

But all I’m going to say is that this is one of the best fics I’ve ever read, standing by for the rest of the story.:raritystarry::heart::twilightoops:

You write Twilight so well I'm starting to get jealous.

No, in this case fangirling is quite appropriate.

You know what, yep, I will actually say, DO NOT excuse my fangirling, pls accept it :twilightsmile:

I knowwwww, the way Twilight is written here is so good :raritycry:

Gloamish you wonderful word person :heart::pinkiegasp:

I wonder if Rarity is starting to suspect something... :trixieshiftright:

:heart: bless yall for the comments, i really appreciate it

ty! i love writing horse words. we WILL find out how rarity feels................................. next week

that's high praise, thank you! writing natural rarilight is EASY they're made for each other. i'm just letting nature run its course

i love writing twilight i s2g. she's such a little freak and i can only show my love by making her suffer ^_^

Ahhhh we have to wait a whole ‘nother week. But it’ll be worth it cuz I know it’s gonna be amazing!

That’s good to hear, honestly this somewhat reminds me of one of my favorite songs, Fly Me to the Moon by Frank Sinatra. Pretty similar vibes.

Ugh my heart. Well at least Rarity finally figured, well, one part out. I swear if my heart gets broken next chapter and they aren’t together, I’m going to have some very choice words for you, author! :raritycry:

Back to this chapter. I want to drink the words. That is all I am able to say after reading the emotional journey this story as been so far. Thank you.

I know, right? It's taking all my mental fortitude not to leap into the screen and make them kiss already.

Milk crates? Really?

Rarity, you are so dumb sometimes.

What do you mean? It’s not like they’ve had passionate make out session or anything…

Great work, most romance related stories I read never went so far with the make out session so it was a surprise to be sure, but a welcome one. Honestly, at this point Twily should just tell Rarity she likes her, I mean there’s no other true way I could see this ending in them together.

Only negative about this chapter that I could muster is that I have to read another one to finish the story, but it isn’t because this is bad, but because I’ll have to wait another week for it to come out.

Cheers, waddling on. :trixieshiftleft:

listen i may be cruel but if a romance story ends in heartbreak i'll use the tragedy tag

really the angsty tone this has kinda ended up with has been mostly an accident as a result of the alternating perspectives. when we lose the pov of one character i want to leave the reader with the impression of the gap between them, to frame their unspoken thoughts for the next chapter, so i guess that's kind of ended up with this miserable mutual pining. we'll get through it folks
they are kissing that's the problem
yeah this one kinda got away from me in terms of risqueness, i hope it wasn't too much. i really wanted to display how twilight can get kinda carried away - rarity's half-right with her concerns, twilight's going fast half because she's applying her analytical mind (and the other half because there's a time limit)

thanks everyone for continuing to read my story which is basically this tweet but with romance instead of therapy

Oh don’t worry, I had no problem with it going far, just a bit of a surprise. Btw, for any future endeavors of mine, how much did you pay to the moderators? Or were they completely okay with this?

Sorry if this is a double reply. Fimfic sometimes just doesn’t send my comment through. I have no problems with what you did, just to clarify in case :twilightblush: (I’m bad at reading tone online). I actually think what you’re doing is cool for the type of story you’re writing.

We will get through it. I’m enjoying the pain. thanks for the clarification

This has been fun as hell to read, looking forward to more!

This is soooo good, I was really impressed by the Rarity perspective last chapter and I loved the Twilight perspective this chapter just as much! You are very very good at writing these gay horses.

Woooonderful chapter, I'm really looking forward to the conclusion! The misunderstanding, the two trying and failing to communicate what they actually want to, hurts so good lmfao, you've written it excellently.

laughing off my concerned inquiry like she hadn't been champing her teeth down to nubs not five minutes ago.

Ah, horse references done well.

"Darling, I don't mean to sound conceited, but I've known you crest to croup practically since you first set down in Ponyville."

Oh yeah, I'm feeling the old tiny horse show magic now.

Ah, how the emotions of Twilight Sparkle rear against the ill-fitting harness of logic.

My little pony, my little pony... ahhh-ahhh-ahhh-ahhh-AHHHH!

you have no idea how much i love horse words. i've spent multiple showers wondering what lexical gap "everypony" occupies - everybody or everyone... also i'm probably on a watchlist for the amount of times i've googled 'horse anatomy' to get horse body words. i need to print out a poster or something

This is soooo good! I need moooooore, their tears are tasty.

I kid, I want them to be happy.

After Rarity gives Twilight tongue, her state of mind is totally unsurprising and we hardly need to see it. What we need to see way more is Twilight's thought process right after that moment and then on until after this morning.

Has Twilight worked out that Rarity now has the hots for her but she feels guilty about how she made that happen? Or does she think that Rarity just got really worked up in the moment? It seems very unlikely that Twilight failed to notice that Rarity did it.

I can't see ANY reason for her to ask for another date and dragging it out. It seems cruel to herself, cruel to Rarity, and of course excessively abstemious.

So, switching PoV right at or immediately after that critical moment seems important. We know just what Rarity is thinking; Twilight's a mystery that I'm not sure we want deferred. If you already wrote the scene up from both PoVs and chose Rarity's, I'd consider Frankensteining the two halves. If you haven't written it, then never mind I guess? You said getting it working was hard, so I hardly want you to do half a rewrite.

A few minor other points:

"I have every confidence your feelings are reciprocated" -> direct indication that I do not think Twilight would miss if phrased just like that. If on the other hoof you shove 'I have every confidence' to the end of the sentence, then Twilight could miss it.

> Twilight's expression flattens into confusion again. "Uh... And why would I need to know that?"

Rarity's missing this is odd. Maybe if you were to have Rarity reply that she doesn't think Twilight can count on Princess Celestia being sitting or lying down - at least mentally - that would smooth it over.


also i'm probably on a watchlist for the amount of times i've googled 'horse anatomy' to get horse body words. i need to print out a poster or something

horsewords anatomy list
the best kind of watchlist to be on, or the worst kind to be on
depending on your reason for being there

Just caught up, and this is a really cute story. This newest chapter brought both a sweet kiss and some nicely done drama. Hope they figure everything out quickly!

Hooray update! Goodness, all the feels in this one. ;_;

I’m glad I read that authors note- definitely didn’t want to wait again to see it wrap up.

This was a very good chapter. Your stone-squeezing skills are unmatched.

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