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Friendship isn’t always easy. But there’s no doubt that it’s worth fighting for. | YOUTUBE: https://youtube.com/channel/UCGbEH3wUKo6S3rEqTudjDWQ
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Well, this was a surprise to find.
I do like the things added to this story. Misty’s extended dream no doubt has some foreshadowing. And we see more of the impact of Hitch’s words to Sunny. Regardless of intentions, there was no way they wouldn’t hurt.
I guess the only questions I have, besides obvious what comes next, would be if the finale is going to be rated M too? And did you forget to mark this as complete, or is there more coming?
Man, after hearing this pathetic excuse I applaud Hitch for maintaining some of his composure.
Hitch should tell them to piss up a rope. They could of easily just ignored Sunny and not given in to the filly four's instigating. Nopony forced them to become an angry mob out for blood.
11461790
The finale might be rated M as there will be a lot of violence during the confrontation and subsequent battle. And also, yeah, I forgot to mark it as complete. Thanks for telling me.
I'm a little bit confused about the Izzy/Skystar bits.
The Filly Four likely as not had well-off foalhoods, and grew up to think that they were better than others by dint of fame/fortune/connections. That said, perhaps instead of playing on the Spoiled Rich attitude of "I can do whatever I want" you could have played it as them (or at least one of them) not understanding what they did wrong. They might have approached Sunny and someone said something and Sunny got annoyed or FF got annoyed, and it escalated out of control rather than coming in after the fact where it feels like how in the movie "Insta-mob".
Perhaps somewhere else in the crowd a pie could have flown, and like in a lot of cinematic fight scenes it hit the wrong person who then attacked someone else who then attacked a third person and Sunny got caught in the middle of a full town scuffle.
Opaline IMO wasn't around Sunny long enough to do the same amount of damage to Sunny as she was Misty, so I don't think Sunny has to worry about going evil. Robin Williams once said that the happiest people often have the most pain (or something like that) which could apply to Sunny and Izzy, they act so upbeat to cover pain. Hence in the movie when Sunny seemingly gave up it actually hurt like I wanted to reach into the screen and hug Sunny so badly.
Overall you have some great ideas, but this story did seem to jump around rather quickly trying to cover a lot of ground.
11462190
Thanks for your feedback. The Skystar/Izzy bits will be explained further in the next story. It will be a crucial plot point going forward in the saga that I unfortunately can’t spoil, though if you read the first two installments in Izzy’s multiverse trilogy, you’ll understand how she and Skystar know each other. There’s a reason why I cut a lot of the dream sequence in the original edit, especially the Skystar bit, as I wasn’t completely sold on that plot point until a couple days back. As for the Filly Four, I see where you’re coming from, but if you remember in the episode “Ali-Conned,” they were being really manipulative towards Sunny, so there is no way in my opinion that they would not know what they were doing here. To be fair though, I think at least one of them is just a follower. Still not sure if it’s Lily or Rosedust though.
I do agree with you about the pacing though. I ended up cutting a lot of material in order to keep the focus on Misty and Izzy, as well as Sunny. This is just the full uncut version. Both of them are equally canonical to the Misty Saga as this edit is mainly just for those looking for more from the original or had lingering questions. Thank you for your comment.
11462202
You are quite welcome, it's been a while since I saw that episode hence my wanting to figure out how we went from "Hey guys! Solar power" to "BURN THE WITCH, GET HER, KILL HER".
I read the story immediately before this called "worthless" so I am probably not entirely in the know with this multiverse thing.
11462214
I completely understand. The two multiverse stories so far are called: “Izzy Moonbow In The Multiverse of Randomness” and “Izzy Moonbow Across The Multiverse of Randomness” respectively. I’m sure you’ll really love them.
11462217
I'll be sure to give them a look, I have a metaphorical TON of stories on my TRL list both here and in physical books.
Poor Sunny
Seriously, that was their motive for assaulting somepony? I mean, I know Sugar Moonlight isn't the nice girl we all expected her to be before Chapter 2 came out but this... I don't even know what to say about this...
The Skystar stuff confused me. Izzy was alive during her time now? Well let's see where that goes, shall we? But I'm very happy about more Skystar stories. I finally caught an airing of the MLP movie recently and now I'm very much planning on including her in my story as well. Looking forward to that one!
Until then...
11462600
The quest for fame and virality can drive you to do abhorrent things sometimes and for Sugar Moonlight and the Filly Four, that is no different. It’s a shocking motivation and one that isn’t easily digestible, I’m sure, but it wouldn’t be out of character for them to be driven by petty revenge like this seeing as they had Sunny right under their control and she just had to REFUSE to play along with their shallowness. That’s like the ultimate blow to one’s ego as you can get and I always imagined that they would be looking for some sort of payback after this, which is why I had them do this.
As for the Izzy and Skystar stuff, yeah this is shaping up to be a head scratcher, isn’t it? Sadly, you’ll only get how she and Izzy know each other if you read the first two installments in Izzy’s multiverse trilogy seeing as all the stories from “Worthless” onward are connected in some way to each other. The Skystar story’s bonus chapter will explain more of this plot thread and I hope it makes sense. Izzy isn’t actually alive during Skystar’s time as that would just be ridiculous. Instead she accessed G4 through one of Pinkie Pie’s fourth wall portals (again, read the Izzy crossover stories to make sense of this plot device) in order to talk with Skystar.
I promise it’ll make sense with the next entry, trust me. I see the confusion and I completely understand it. See you then!
I'm kinda curious about what Izzy was gonna do here.
11553246
Izzy was definitely angry in this situation, but she’s too kind to actually take it out on Misty. Basically what would’ve happened if Misty hadn’t spoken up like she did was that Izzy would’ve just lightly scolded her along the lines of: “You lied to me” or something and then walk off. I don’t consider Izzy to be the confrontational type.
AI review: https://www.fimfiction.net/group/217075/ai-reviews/thread/520719/forgiven-extended-cut
11640416
Praise be to the AI! I really appreciate the reviews on this story and Worthless. I really like how detailed they are. What kind of AI do you use for these reviews if I may ask? I’m quite intrigued.
11640538
Answered in the review, but Claude is the one we are asking.
Oh, Sunny. If only you could've remembered that later.
Did Izzy indirectly put this whole chain of events into motion?
11659456
Well, that’s definitely one way of looking at it.